Life and Times of Teh Asuka

Last month I was writing SO MUCH!!

We're 11 days into a new months and I've written, let me check... oh huh okay 5 000 words, that's not too bad, man it's crazy how my self-perception tends to only base itself on the last two days. If I haven't written in two days then I haven't written in AGES and I am FAILING HOMG but no pressure, self.

But still, hn.

One of them is the beginning of Jade's scene in Garden, yay, the other one is a brand new, silly sequel to the john/jade(/karkat) chatlog fic. It's another chatlog! :O This time Karkat really is in it.

Neither of them, you'll be surprised to learn, is Teamwork. :O

I have the file open right now. I'm staring at it. Sakura refuses to do anything interesting. When I try to make her go smart she goes "this is so dry and emotionless" and when I try to make her emotion-thinking she goes "why am I regressing to my Teamwork 1 self here" and, I don't know, mostly I keep going "aaaaa will i manage to write the naruto/sasuke interaction right i should have written it back when I ahd the scene in mind and it was still ALIVE aaaaaaaaaaa" and it's distracting me a lot from Sakura's scene, where the only hook is whether she'll win her match or not.

I'm hesitant to give myself an ultimatum à la "write 500 words of teamwork a day!!!!!" because sometimes that works and sometimes that backfires horribly, but at this point it seems obvious I'm not going to be brushed by the magnificent plumage of Divine Inspiration anytime soon and maybe I should just slog through it and just be DONE WITH IT and be able to get to the NEXT PARTS AAAA.


I've also been flopping around a lot wanting to write GW bondwolves, only I've been wanting to write HEERO and Mary, not Duo and Killer. Only the way the fic keeps lengthening on me there's still a whole two chapters at least before Heero pops up. Goddamn it. But at least I still feel like I'm progressing some on that fic, because even if I'm not writing I'm still watching the episodes while biking away, and nowaways what I do when I get off is write down how the plot diverged where and why, and where the wolves were at the time. XD

For example when Trowa was lost in space with amnesia he comes down to Earth with Quatre and Heero and Mary, and when Heero and Mary peel off he stays with Quatre (no space for two wolves in the compartment underneath the pilot's chair, no matter that one of them is a teenage bitch-puppy that's still half grown up.) Meanwhile amnesiac!Trowa is wondering what is missing so horribly, even though the obvious answer should be YOUR MEMORIES DICKFACE it never seems like that's quite it. I think when he sees Duo in the audience with Killer (there is no making a bondwolf lie down between the rows of seats so he'd be highly visible) he'd probably fall right off whatever he was balancing on at the time with the headache of the century, and then Catherine would *really* kill Duo. XD

Seriously with all the many times the boys were taken prisoners and their wolves taken hostage to ensure coperation and all the accidental separations (read: selfdestructs XD) it's a real game of musical chairs. I don't think any of the wolves has NOT been separated from his human for unreasonable lengths of time and a lot of incertitude re: how the fuck do we find each other again, which is not really how these things should go but then again gundam pilots don't really do things by the book, like, ever, anyway. Wait, Glen hasn't been separated from his master yet, but I don't think it helps seeing that Treize is going to kick the bucket on him at some point and is already loudly and repeatedly thinking about it and asking random pilots to please kill him. XD;



re: battlefield terra, I have a collection of ideas of what happens in this chapter and am now trying to tie them in a way that does not scream HOMG FILLER EPISODE. Actually it really shouldn't be fillery at ALL, I'm just not seeing it clearly enough to write. Hrrn. Must brainstorm more.

So the last child of Team Seven I have in mind is Uchiha Yukito -- a boy, then, born when Sakura is about 45 or possibly even later... yes, she's menopausal by then, advanced medical jutsu FTW! The kid is born via artificial insemination, because even though Sakura carries him, genetically, apart from her mitochondrial DNA he really is a pure Sasuke/Naruto baby. (basically they found a way to empty one of her ovums from her own DNA and replace it with Naruto's. Or maybe Sasuke's. I haven't decided yet who wins the battle for "No, YOU get to be Yukito's biological mom!")

This is what I know about him:
For someone who is made in equal parts of Uchiha Sasuke and Uzumaki Naruto's genes, Yukito's mild, laid-back disposition is nothing short of confounding. Sometimes Sakura entertains herself with the thought that her last child is so easy-going out of sheer perverseness. No doubt he would have inherited it straight from her, somehow.

Yukito has grayish brown hair, and also the sharingan, but he'll never develop it farther than the second tomoe. He's content with being average. Everyone in his family is extreme in some way and it's all very tiring, really. D:

But anyway.

I was toying with the thought of a real threesome baby, though truly since a kid gets half and half from their parents it's a bit hard to have three parents, unless you pick and choose who gives which genes, and that would take CENTURIES. But maybe you could merge two sperm cells and get that one to fertilize the egg, and then the baby would be half Sakura and one fourth each Naruto and Sasuke. (no sharingan for that one.) But at her age, Sakura can't really afford to have more than one, very closely supervised pregnancy. Even that one wouldn't be great fpor her health, so two of them back to back would be too much.

.. Twins are hardly an easy pregnancy, but she figures they'd still tire her out less than two separate ones, especially ones as medically watched over. I'm just not sure which medical discovery would come first (the two father, no mother thing, or the two-fathers-merged-as-one, one mother.) Because the offer Sakura made was basically to let Sasuke and Naruto experience the one single bond they yet hadn't, which is all very selfless, but if they can make threesome babies... um.

Then again it might be easier to merge two sperm cells with medical jutsu and then use those than to do the ovum thing, so Sakura might mention it as a stepping stone on the way to the two-dads thing, and later they might suggest to use it as well, half as her "reward" for being so selfless, a kid who is more her than either of them, but also either of them, and half because omg threesome baby. Also, maximizing uchiha clan genetic diversity is always good.

But, I don't know. If they can do one, would they really do the other one. Both solutions make the other one a bit redundant.

Then again is there really a ceiling on happiness and empty nest syndrome. XD

But just in case, the threesome baby would be a girl called Kahen, which means petal, because Sakura's mom is Hana (flower) and Sakura is a specific type of flower, so she might as well go with part-of-flower for the third generation. (dunno what Kahen'd call her own kid, though. Chlorophyll cell? XD)

I have NO IDEA what her personality would be like, though. >___> I planned the other three around subverted Mary-Sue types to give myself a starting point (team seven children would veer close to Sue just by virtue of having the parents they have anyway), but I already have the FemmeFataleSue type and the PrettierAndBitchierThanYou!Uchiha type and the... well, first kid is still spoiler. What could I twist -- oh my god, a GothSue. XD ("Kahen? KAHEN??? MY NAME IS OOKAMI MOONRAVEN!!" pffff) okay um maybe not... Maybe not even a sue-type either.

Suggestions?


edit: ( ... okay so Goth sounds like too much fun to say not to, right now. XDDD )

I'd decided earlier today would be Teamwork Ploitting day, even if I didn't actually write anything. Save for sudden and random curveballs I have almost all of the plot for the tournament, but I still need to fine-tune the actual scenes.

So of course instead I got marriage bunnies.

And then they went and turned into bunnies for that AU 'verse where Sasuke is a girl and she and Sakura are both preggers. So now I'm writing the pipeline seal scene/ficlet. The bunny is making "this could totally turn into hothot sasusaku yuri sexx0rs" eyes at me. D:

Oh, and in the Haru and GirlNaruto Teamwork AU, Kyuubi is making disgruntled noises about how annoying Naruto's bitches are getting and next time he'll make sure to have her plumbing tweaked enough that she can have a litter with several different sires if she feels like it, and it's not his fault he didn't think to do it before, he's a man-fox okay. And naruto is all D: WAIT I DON'T WANT GUARANTEED MULTIPLE BIRTHS IT'S OKAY REALLY but oops, too late, but what are you complaining about, it saves time! also next time maybe you can go looking for other potential fathers and none of them will bitch/leave/try to eat the cubs because far as they know one of the kids could be theirs. XD

Specifically, your math help.

Do you know anything about statistics? If so, you might save the... um, couple of lines that I wanted Kakashi to say, except I figure HE knows about statistics so that the fact I don't is no excuse. I tried to muddle through with basic logic, but statistics being what it is I quickly got myself all tangled up in confusion and vaguely remembered school lessons from over a decade ago. Hrrrn. Curse you, Kakashi.

Anyway. 16 participants, 3 of which are members of Team Seven. They get paired up for matches. What's the likelihood of any two Team Seven members meeting each other?

Assuming they all miss each other and the next stage (8 participants) also has 3 Team Seven members, how much do the odds rise?


... this is all for the sake of two lines of dialogues that I might also rewrite, but let it not be said that I stifled Kakashi's self expression. >__>

HOLY FUCK IT'S BEEN SIX MONTHS SINCE THE LAST TIME I ADDED TO TEAMWORK PROPER

WHY DID NO ONE TELL ME

WHY DID NO ONE WHACK ME WITH SHARP STICKS AND CHAINSAWS

SIX. MONTHS. DUDE.

( bitchings and whinings therein )

Okay, done. As you were. >__>

... and on top of the weekly stuff there's a Chibi Lee and Team Gai chapter! I am torn between total WTF and total squee. The squee might be winning, but the WTF is still there. It's awesome. XD CHIBIS. CHIBITENTEN AND CHIBINEJI AND CHIBIGAI AND CHIBILEE. ngggggghsocute. It's totally outside of continuity, so you can read it whenever.

I can't wait to see all the many icons this will produce in fandom. XD

( quick babble about the last shippuden filler episode X3 )

Today was a good day for Naruto-related crack.

( Manga! )

So I kind of have a month's lag before the tournament stage of the chuunin exam, and no real plot to stuff in it. But, er. I think the Kyuubi/Akatsuki combo kind of skewed my view of what "plot" means.

There's the potential Gaara scene, which is plot-relevant even though it introduces stuff that'll have to wait until teamwork 4 (oh my god kill me now) to be picked up again. But that's damn short for a chapter, and apart from that I just have vague ideas of of team being cuddly or training or whatnot. I can't decide if that's bad and fillerific and should be cut out (or at best relegated to the sidestory files,) or if people want it? Also, are there issues I should probably bring up during the lag? I'm open to all comers suggestions right now.

*cough*

Anyway, so far it gives me the feeling it's in Naruto POV, but that can certainly change if better ideas come along.

... I know I still have replies to write for the "give me a female character and i'll tell you why I love her" meme, but i'm stalled on them. (is anyone still waiting for a reply anyway? I'm horrible about replies, if it's more than two days later I tend to think "well, surely they've forgotten and it will be weird to reply so late, no one cares anymore" and so more often than not I end up not replying at all. Okay, half of it is my laziness looking for an excuse... then again I don't think I really can reply to *everything*, I might explode a little bit. x__x *actually kind of antisocial irl*)


But anyway.

* Gimme a character/pairing/threesome I've written/fangirled about, and I'll give you a bit of my personal headcanon for them. (their childhood, their secret hobbies, their sex life... haha especially their sex life. /perv)

* Comment with a story I've written, and I will tell you one thing I knew, learned, or wondered about while writing the story that didn't make it onto the page.
(if asking about teamwork, restore, or some other big 'verse, please try to narrow it down a bit because there are too many choices and I could have no clue where to start. XD; As for crossed wires, please no questions about it.)



¤ Will write a weekly naruto post later. (or maybe not. ehh. Depends on my laziness.) Chapter's up at mangastream, though.

¤ I still owe ten ItaSasu AU snippets, but my itasasu curse has hit again. Half the ideas I have are more brotherly than pairingly, and none of them are solidifying very fast. But they're still on my to-write list at the moment.

So Jo and Monique helped me with this list, but I'm not sure if we're forgetting people there... Also once i'm done I'll have to separate the people invited to the ceremony and the people invited to the meal and party afterwards! But, that can wait. >__>;;

( List (work in progress) )

I'm still planning to write more Team Seven drabbles/ficlets at some point! Some of the promts are very prrt. And you guys are still welcome to give me more suggestions. (or comment on the three ficlet-things I already did post. Yes. You may do that, indeed. u____u.)

But well, I haven't written more yet because I've been writing Sasuke's Teamwork chapter. I suppose you guys totally hate me for this. u.u~

Frankly I'm not sure it's much better than the previously written thinger (which I ended up reusing a lot of anyway.) I decided to go EXPERIMENTAL and non-chronological and for a little bit the timeline keeps flipping between two different moments. I'm still trying to work out the kinks, because so far both Jo and Saro got confused at it, so...yeah. I suspect my in-prose timeline markers aren't obvious enough. Maybe some big - LINE BREAK - BEGIN FLASHBACK - would do the trick... XD

Maybe nothing short of a big BEGIN FLASHBACK would do the trick. DX

... Well, if my experimentation fails I guess I'll have to put everything back in chronological order, which will have the added benefit of saving my inbox from three dozen WE DUN GET IT from ffnet, but poo. Not as shiny for me.


I'm bad. For a couple of reasons! but the only one that's not too spoilery to share is this one. When I was writing this little bit of Sasuke POV I couldn't stop cackling.
Sakura was safe enough for now -- anyone who got within a half-mile of her wasn't going to survive Kyuubi long enough to cause her any trouble.
Pffffhahahaha YOU KEEP TELLING YOURSELF THAT.