Life and Times of Teh Asuka

Contains Pail-Free Xenosexual Relationships Between a Male Mutant Troll and Male Human for the Purpose of Exhibitionistic Sexual Gratification, Polyquadranted Individuals Presented in a Neutral or Positive Way, and Puppets Used in Several Perverted Ways, One of Those Puppets Depicting a Rad as Fuck Big-Nosed Allusion to Our Glorious Empress, Which She in Her Wisdom Has Allowed to Keep Existing Because Damn Straig)(t I Got Da Biggest One.

*eyes fic*

... Eh, I've written pornier.

I'm sure. Somewhere.

novidactyl asked: 1. Bro/Signless (my rarepair♥) 2.Flush 3.Pornstar AU w/ smuppets for Bro's website (humanstuck or normal species are both fantastic)
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"And really, in the digital age, with shit like tumblr and reddit around, what's going to touch the most people, boring long-ass sermons, or streaming free porn clips that fuck with hemocastist expectations and contain gleeful and unapologetic quadrant-smearing?"

On the other side of his bed, unzipping his pants, Signless laughed quietly. "Bro, I've already agreed to film this movie with you."

Bro shrugged, nodded, kept ogling. The guy's pants would be hilarious if he didn't fill them so well. Bro was also a fan of the zipper being placed on the side, from under the arm to the hip; the way it unveiled him as the cloth fell away was especially interesting.

( Read more... )

Anonymous asked: BT guys shower gangbang fantasy/embarassing wet dream?

(yay for fishing old prompts out of the abyss! weirdass floaty dream ahoy. contain vague dream porn, stealth angst and dreamy creepiness. also probably happens either during the first half of chapter 7 or before chpt7 entirely.)

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He's walking at a fast pace in the weird alien corridors of this weird alien hive (not running, the labs will get him if he runs), turning left and right and left. He's alone, it's weird, he should find John (he should enjoy being alone but being alone here isn't safe, the labs will get him). He doesn't know where John is though, but yes, he knows, John is where John always goes.

( Read more... )

For this kink meme prompt:
So, seadweller!Bro sees lowblood!Dave and it's pity at first sight. Maybe he's using weird seadweller rituals or maybe he's just being his strange self to court Dave. Unfortunately, Dave has no idea why this finface is constantly in his business. Show me how they become moirails, please. ♦

Contains: trollstuck human characters, pale ephebophilia/age difference issues, Bro being juuuust a little creepy.

Also background Dave/Terezi/Karkat shenanigans. Because I could. >__>

( ghastlyTrickster [GT] started trolling turntechGodhead [TG] )

Done spamming for today. Phew.
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Petstuck, once again for the kink meme though there's no sex at all in it. Petstuck AU, which means trolls are sentient-ish animals. This is not a fic about adressing everything that is wrong with owning sentient beings and activism to save their asses, those have been written already. It’s early days in troll ownership yet and not a lot is known about them.

Jade accidentally adopts a young, orphaned troll, much against the wishes of her long-suffering boyfriend. Horrible cuteness ensues.

( 'Bec,' Jade asks very patiently, like the totally understanding dog lady she is, 'why is there a baby troll riding you like a pony?' )

Background pairings are still Gamzee♦Karkat, Terezi♣Gamzee and Dave♥Terezi.

Any Dave♦Rose or Byrd♦John exist solely in Karkat’s fevered imagination okay.

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Chapter 7: Day twelve, evening

It is party time tonight at Casa de Strider, by which you mean on the roof which technically is not part of the apartment but fuck that noise.

It's also only a party if you consider a bunch of people sitting or standing around making small talk in between yawns a party. ( Read more... )

Chapter 3: day ten

You wake to a thumping noise, Dave going ow.

You don't want to be awake, you're warm and nice and cuddlysafe, but this sounds just too suspicious. Your eyes crack open.

Bro's face is about ten inches away from your own.

"--Ghhk."

He stares. You stare back. You hate how you don't sleep in your shades, even though sleeping in shades is stupid and a great way to get them broken and anyway iShades need to recharge too. He can see your naked face, which is even more embarrassing than if you were actually naked.

Well, fuck. Looks like he's not going to take no for an answer today.

He tilts his head a little. You cringe, brace yourself.

"Cute."

... The fuck?

You blink. Your hand twitches to grab the covers and pull them up, on pure reflex, and oh hey you're stuck. You look down.

You seem to have sprouted a growth in the form of a troll.( Read more... )

The Family You Choose ‘verse (fourth in the series, first being Awake at Night — click the tag). The first three dealt with culture clashes, and Dad Egbert adopting Karkat and Gamzee. This one is Davesprite-centric.

Post-Sburb on Earth, guardians are alive again, Dirk and Roxy get to live in the same time period as the other humans, all trolls who survived are being hosted by humans.

Pairing: Davesprite/Karkat, background Dave/Terezi and others.

It’s been eight days since the end of Sburb and Davesprite is not coping especially well.

( Once upon a time she got your best bro killed and your Jade died as a result and you had to leave your Rose behind to wait alone in a doomed timeline for a horrible end to catch up. It's been weird sharing an apartment with her post-Game, but then again everything's been weird. )</a

I started writing BT proper, and then Dirk and Dave’s Bro started being all “hey I’m talking to you” and I was like “okay sure I’ll do a drabble quicklike” and BAM six pages of prequel-fic.

3 000 words of Mr. Strider meeting his clonebabies for the first time. Also features Doc Lalonde.

Or: In Which The Characters Prove Exactly Why They Shouldn’t Have Kids Ever, But They Have Them Anyway And It’d Be A Pain To Return Them Now So Hey Why Not.

( 'They're not going to bite, you know,' Romy drawled without even turning to look at him, as she forced a sausage-like Harleybertian leg in a leg-hole. She was smirking, though, he could tell from her voice. 'Or projectile venom. Hell, even vomit wouldn't get that far.' )