random teamwork sillies + bleach

[askerian]

-A random Teamwork behind-the-scenes thing:
Kakashi and Anko, being both very fucked up, broken people with NEEDS thank you, are friends with benefits. Except they're not even really close friends, so their relationship is mostly benefits. Good! That's the best part anyway.

Alas, Gai thinks it is, or should be, an epic!!romance.

Cue Anko developing a... crush-like thing? on *Gai*. Mostly to the tune of WHAT THE FUCK AM I THINKING D: but he can match and follow her manic bursts! And he doesn't judge her. And oh god that BODY. Just. I dunno. Stuff his head in a paper bag or something. STAMINA FREAK. TAIJUTSU MASTER = AMAZING COORDINATION. the curiosity is eating her alive.

But they both can already guess that if he was told, he'd go all "while you are very charming and womanly and likely a great person very deep down, I would never betray my best friend like this sob sob how tragic."

Cue Anko suggesting a threesome.
(but sex only because relationships = hahahahaNO)

Cue Kakashi mentioning that he likes how his one remaining eye out of the original set isn't blind yet and he'd like to keep it that way. D:

Then Anko blames Kakashi's kids for the wave of threesome attempts going on in the village right now*, and then Kakashi mentions he might feel obligated to cut her off from benefits, now, hint hint. Then again, she can still go and actually, oh, ask Gai out. After a year of "I APOLOGIZE MOST SINCERELY FOR STEALING YOUR HAPPINESS, KAKASHI" he might even propose!

Anko: ... okay, fine, shut up, put down your porn and come right here.
Kakashi: u.\\ yes, yes. *winz!*
*cue benefits*

*Later*
Anko: Oh yeah -- harder -- harder -- oh GAI.
Kakashi: ... DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDX *wilts FOREVER*
Anko: >:D~~~~~


*(the only other threesome attempt so far is temari/shikamaru/ino and it doesn't end up well, so Anko might be exaggerating a bit here. XD)


Read Naruto and Bleach here! (and even One Piece if that's your cup of tea.) (ahaha naruto isn't up yeeeet aaaaa.)



askerian: bleach is up
sarolynne: Oh, Bleach. I don't know if I want you.
sarolynne: I just don't know.
askerian: it's ridiculous how long their legs are getting
askerian: mulletkiiiing
sarolynne: Pfffft.
sarolynne: Yeah, Bleach seems to be doing it's best to mimic sort of stereotypical BL art conventions.

askerian: kubo tite: hey, aizen isn't hyped up enough. i know! let's make the ... um. What else can we use who hasn't gone WOW at the size of Aizen penis yet... I KNOW! the train-thing that eats people if they come without a hell butterfly, and make it a SPECIAL monsterthing that doesn't get affected by reiatsu and is thus out of reach of, like, everyone... AND HAVE AIZEN DEFEAT IT ANYWAY."

askerian: ... i do love ichigo's dad.
askerian: countdown to him getting killed to awaken ichigo's badassery... 10... 9...
sarolynne: Yeah, something like that is probably on the way.
askerian: also, kubo is dropping hints that creepysmile guy might not be 100% evil after all!
askerian: but AIZEN IS ON TO HIM.
sarolynne: XDDDDD
sarolynne: OF COURSE HE IS.
sarolynne: Because he is AIZEN.
askerian: ...oh, a training arc.
askerian: because the inbetween time apparently is in a bubble and doesn't happen anywhere! huh.

askerian: oh man, ichigo's dad is about to teach him his ultimate technique. he's so dead.

askerian: k-keigo D:
sarolynne: ...Oh, damn. Now I'll have to read it.
askerian: he just has one panel at the end
askerian: read next week's XD
sarolynne: XDDD

sarolynne: ...A part of me wants to be interested in Gin. Like. It really does. And Ichigo papa. But. Aizen. God, you mullet wearing motherfucker.


... pfft oh saro. ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥


it's crazy how much Aizen from behind reminds me of Orihime. That long flowing ginger hair as he walks to the senkaimon! GASP DID I GET THE NEXT PLOT TWIST

AIZEN IS ORIHIME

I MEAN HER SON. FROM THE FUTURE.

... it would make as much sense as everything else in recent canon. What can I say.

Comments

[nobody-famous.livejournal.com]

I would totally read a fic with your Anko/Kakashi/Gai. Anko needs more fandom love. And that tidbit would be hilarious. xD;;

[askerian]

I'm very tempted to write it before/during/after the marriage thinger. it would be really fun if I went with a series of "snapshot" drabbles with all the guests having something from their POV

... okay maybe not ALL the guests but... oooohh. *O*

*commences flailing* OH MY GOD BUNNY TSUNAMI.

[nobody-famous.livejournal.com]

*cackles* Doooo it!

[kirai-akuma.livejournal.com]

Everything is better with Anko... in other words hell yes! DO IT! So funny...

[nobody-famous.livejournal.com]

I agree with this so much. Anko is wonderful. (Though I'm not so fond of the food anko...)

[joisbishmyoga.livejournal.com]

Aizen: ORIHIME, I AM YOUR FATHER. *air hiss* Or grandfather, give or take a few generations. Though I might be your evil half-twin once removed who time-traveled to the past, spawned our line, and died, thus moving to Soul Society and working my way up the ranks. YOU WILL NEVER KNOW, BECAUSE I AM THAT EVIL THAT I ONLY GET TO TELL MY EVIL BACKSTORY TO ONE PERSON! And that is The Overpowered Dumbass Hero, Ichigo, my one true love buttboy enemy.

[askerian]

Pfft.

the worst is that I wouldn't even be surprised at this point. oh kubo tite why.

[joisbishmyoga.livejournal.com]

NO, I KNOW. He CLONED Orihime from himself. It's all part of his evil plot! He cloned her and programmed her to try to be in Ichigo's school, so that someday when a totally unforeseeable series of events happened (which were actually all done by Aizen, the Hollow that whacked Rukia in front of Ichigo, and Rukia breaking laws to transfer her power, and Orihime being attacked by a Hollow, and her chain of fate almost breaking) and activated her power, she'd be in reserve for his entirely planned move to Hueco Mundo...

... I can't go on. The Shounen Manga "Logic", it is killing me.

[askerian]

*d-ded*

... THIS READS ALMOST CANON ALREADY.

[joisbishmyoga.livejournal.com]

You know that she's got some sort of failsafe booby-trap in her, right? So that when Ichigo rescues her, he still has to rescue her?

note to self: ignore realism, remember soap opera sells

[askerian]

Sorry ichigo, your princess is in another castle =3

[(Anonymous)]

Yep, I'd read it.

And Bleach... man, Aizen really ruined that show. Well, okay, it wasn't perfect before that, but at least it was mostly internally consistent. He peaked in the Soul Society arc when he convinced the world he died (kinda like the devil's greatest trick, as they say), and he's just been getting stupider (yet, conversely, more all-powerful) since then.

-- Guile

[askerian]

God yes, by now he's nothing but a big caricature of a smooth-talking mastermind. He's NOTHING ELSE. And now, a penishead transformation and then a goddamn MULLET? Seriously?

... granted it's not like i was taking him seriously before that happened either. Then again before those chapters I was mostly going grrnnrrngh Aizen and now i'm AHAHAHA SO LAME! aizen, so. Maybe things did indeed get better. >__>

[(Anonymous)]

... You know, I would love to read Kakashi and Gai in bed together, as part of a threesome.

Gai: This will be my 52nd win, Kakashi! *thumbs up*
Kakashi: This would be so much better if you just didn't talk, Gai.
Anko: Best. Rivalry. Ever.

Incidentally, I subscribe to the fanon that Gai fucks like a God.

-- Guile

[askerian]

... oh god XD XD XD Anko would be SO HAPPY.

This is an awesome bit of fanon indeed.

[kitty11chan.livejournal.com]

Agreed. You should totally do it.

[flowerflute.livejournal.com]

Okay, Anko, go get yourself a decent ballgag and full-hood, remove the spandex and be rocked. Then henge around the village until either you die, gai dies or you're up for another fuck, because he won't. leave. you. alone!

[askerian]

...oh my god your icon. i stared at it for a whole minute before HAPPY PENIS popped up. XD


... this is a very nice suggestion. XD-b

[flowerflute.livejournal.com]

theqilin made it on request for me. Happy penis+gay rainbow background = awesome.

Y thank u.

[kitty11chan.livejournal.com]

I am amazed they haven't killed your icon yet.

[leahnari.livejournal.com]

Anko, Gai and Kakashi... this has the makings of AWESOME.

I would so read it *puppy eyes*

[flourite-roses.livejournal.com]

Thank you so much for making me laugh! ^__^ I needed it lol.

[uminohikari.livejournal.com]

I can't see Anko as particularly happy when Gai starts following her around though :P

[ithilgwath.livejournal.com]

STAMINA FREAK. TAIJUTSU MASTER = AMAZING COORDINATION. the curiosity is eating her alive.

...and now the curiosity is eating ME alive! XD

*Later*
Anko: Oh yeah -- harder -- harder -- oh GAI.
Kakashi: ... DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDX *wilts FOREVER*
Anko: >:D~~~~~

bwhahahah! Oh Anko. You so evil. XD *pats Kakashi on head* poor poor man.

[sara-the-lazy.livejournal.com]

That plotbunny is awesome. I would definitely enjoy reading it if you were to write it.

My favorite line of what you did write - "Cue Kakashi mentioning that he likes how his one remaining eye out of the original set isn't blind yet and he'd like to keep it that way. D:"

Bwahahahah.