Asuka Theater!

Family reunion this weekend! Dubious asuka is dubious, but.

Yay! good food. Yay! playing with the kids all afternoon, so I get bonus points from keeping them busy AND avoid grownup talk on politics and soccer and shit. Yay, letting grandmother cut a few inches from my hair because they're starting to fray at the bottom again! That lets her feel like she's slowly winning the fight to make me into a real girl, and gets her off my *hah* hair. I mean, it worked fine the first time i let her do this!

Asuka: I am somewhat confused as to why we aren't doing this in the bathroom this time around, grandma.
Asuka's grandma: Pshh, no reason. Sit. You'd look very good with short hair.
Asuka: No thanks grandma. If I could my hair would be DOWN TO MY ASS. (alas it always frays by the time it's shoulderblade length boohoo.) Maybe an inch or two under shoulder length?
Asuka's grandma: hm hm hm. Shoulder length! It's only an inch or two, it would grow fast AND be more healthy for your hair!
Asuka: ... Well, that IS only an inch or two. Okay, shoulder length. Hm, but I find it somewhat frustrating that I can't see what you are doing on account of the lack of mirrors in the kitchen.
Asuka's grandma: Bah! It'll be a surprise.
Asuka: But shoulder length, grandma!
Asuka's grandma: Of course, of course. *clip clip clip*
Asuka's cousin: oh, haircut, how ni... um, grandma, that's a little short, isn't it?
Asuka's grandma: Pshh! Not at all. It's shoulder length! >__> Also it's not like I can glue it back on.
Asuka: *... um. glue what now*
Asuka's grandma: LOOK FORWARD AND STOP MOVING. *clip clip clip*
Asuka: ... >__>;
Asuka's cousin: ... well I think it looks very nice! really!
Asuka: ... >_____>;;; ???
Asuka's grandma: There! done.
Asuka's cousin: ... oh yes, it suits you pretty well! Um. It looks very cute.
Asuka: *turns her head* ...
Asuka's grandma: :DDD ?
Asuka: GRANDMA. WHY DO I FEEL AIR ON THE BACK OF MY NECK GRANDMA.
Asuka's grandma: :DDDDDDDDDDDDD Tadahh!
Asuka: *rushes to bathroom & mirror* ...
.......
.............
AAAA
I KNOW I HAVE A SHORT NECK BUT IN WHICH WORLD DOES SHOULDER LENGTH = JAW LENGTH
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Asuka's grandma: Hmph! you look much prettier in this style, which incidentally I've been badgeting you about for years. See, you should have stopped being all "no grandma i like my long hair just fine thank you" years ago!
Asuka: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Asuka's grandma: Oh, shush. ... Wait a second, this side is longer than the other side.
Asuka: oh fine, i do so like being symmetrica--aaaaaaa now i can barely tuck my bangs behind my ear aaaaaaaaaaaa I WILL NEVER TRUST YOU AGAIN.
Asuka's cousin: ... no, really, it looks cute! daughter-dear, tell her it looks cute.
Asuka's cousin's kid: ... :/ well um. i like long hair better. ... for me i mean, for other people it's um, nice i guess. i just. like it long. mine i mean. yeah. OH LOOK THEY ARE PLAYING WITH DOLLS BRB :DDD;;

Asuka: *GOES HOME HOMG* HEY BROTHER >:( *barges into brother room*
Asuka's brother's girlfriend: hey asukOMG WHAT HAPPENED D:
Asuka: ... HAH. >:E
Asuka's brother's girlfriend: ...?
Asuka: See, you're sometimes a bitch, but that's why I know I can trust you on this.
Asuka's brother: *knows nothing of fashion!* *doesn't give a shit about what people look like!* ... isn't that... a bit short... D:
Asuka: *VINDICATED DAMN IT* >:E >:E >:E ... T____T I am never leaving the house again.