why Asuka can't write PWP to save her life:

[askerian]

Mental process of the Asuka:

-Get a scene bunny (locker room, after hours, mostly empty. Guy A, angry/intense/seme, drags Guy B under the shower, fully dressed. Shock, two seconds of struggling, kissing and grinding ensues. They're quickly drenched. Automatic lights go out, semi-darkness for the rest of the scene. Mutual masturbation through wet jeans => climax.)

->try to find guys the scene would fit.

->Decide that for once, Sasuke can be seme in my fics.

->Why would Sasuke be angry at Naruto and *molest him for it* instead of kicking him in the face?

->He might be angry because Naruto put himself in danger in a way he perceives stupid, or at least a way he can pretend was stupid, so he can punish Naruto for daring to worry him.

->What sort of settings might this happen in?

->Canonverse: too many things to justify as to when Sasuke came back and when the situation changed and when Naruto and Sasuke started getting physical. I don't like writing for established relationships. AU?

->Recall schoolfic 'verse where Sasuke was the outcast (for replying something like "not even if you had a dick" to a girl asking him out), and Naruto wasn't exactly popular but had a small crew composed of Chouji, Shikamaru and Kiba. Naruto thought of himself as straight but they kept ending up liplocking anyway. Random encounters in the shower would be justifiable.

->Okay, schoolfic AU. Everyone needs to write at least one, right?

->Right.

->Why is Naruto coming in the locker room after everyone else is long gone?

->He's had a rotten day, the teacher made him put everything back.

*Mental picture of weary!Naruto*

->He's had a REALLY rotten day.

->What could happen to make his day so rotten, AND make Sasuke not-worry for him so much he'd have to wait for him and kiss him like crazy for it?

->...

loading... loading...

->OMG I KNOW HIS FATHERS TWIN BROTHER KYUUBI THE SERIAL KILLER CAME BACK IN TOWN AND GRABBED HIM AND TOLD HIM HORRIBLE THINGS LIKE HE RAPED NARUTOS MOM AND HE MIGHT BE NARUTOS REAL DAD AND HE WANTED NARUTO TO COME WITH HIM BECAUSE HES A FUCKING POSSESSIVE MONSTER AND HE WANTS TO OWN AND WARP AND LEAVE HIS MARK ON EVERYTHING HIS SWEET ANGEL PERFECT BROTHER EVER HAD TO HIS NAME BECAUSE ITS SO FUN TO SEE HIM TRY NOT TO HATE AND NOT MANAGE IT

AND NARUTO HAD TO FIND A WAY TO ESCAPE AND CALL THE COPS AND HE ENDED UP AT THE HOSPITAL AND HES STILL REELING AND HIS PARENTS NEVER TOLD HIM ANYTHING AND HES PRETTY SURE ITS TRUE BECAUSE HIS DAD WOULDNT LOOK AT HIM IN THE EYE

AND THEN IT WAS IN THE NEWSPAPER, THE WHOLE SORDID AFFAIR LIKE HIS MOM WAS RAPED BY HER BROTHER IN LAW THE PSYCHOPATH, AND HIS WHOLE SCHOOL KNOWS

->...

-> and fuck, I'm not writing thirty pages of backstory just for a quick lemon in the shower. I'll lose the lemony mood ages before I get there.

Mood: already lost, actually.

-> go play jigsaw on Gaia.

Comments

[book-people.livejournal.com]

...I love you. No, seriously. <3

[askerian]

*loved yay*

*loves back* :333

[sarolynne.livejournal.com]

♥♥♥♥

So-cute. Seriously. I love the why you over think PWPs, seriously.

Though I'm not sure what this says about the fact I can just write them? I guess I don't think about it all that much. Ah well.

*loves all over*

[askerian]

nuh not cute ;.;

Now I feel like I don't take care of your writing needs adequately. u.u;;;;

[mandy347.livejournal.com]

This is why you're one of my favorite authors.

[askerian]

#.____.# ♥

[meritjubet.livejournal.com]

...ah, you want PWP with plot. Um. Forget characterisation and go straight to the sex? ;)

[askerian]

But if I'm not thinking about who they are and how they're different, how do I know what they DO during the sex? What they feel? It's boring cookie-cutter smut otherwise. D:

[windandwater.livejournal.com]

XD!

ilu Asuka. And your brain.

[askerian]

;3 my brain luv u 2 ♥

[inane-romance.livejournal.com]

-headesk-
<3<3<3
[/delurk]

[askerian]

;_____; *emos at*

[jmercedesd.livejournal.com]

*snork*

*ROFL*

Good job. XD

[askerian]

yeah, MOCK MY PAIN. D:

[monique-27.livejournal.com]

...

...I do so love your thought processes. *^.^*

*loves on Asuka whut*

[askerian]

*loved on yay* ♥♥♥

[stripedpetunia.livejournal.com]

...See, Asuka, the POINT of PWP is that no one NEEDS a justification stated for why they're where they are and fucking.

But you're adorable, so please don't ever change. ♥♥

[askerian]

;_; but I need it. *sniffle* *is a mutant*

♥

[kohikari.livejournal.com]

XD

Like meritjubit said.

PWP is PWP because it has no plot. You tried to inject plot into pointless pr0n. (I do the same thing. ^^; Hey, plot is sexy too!)

(8D But if you wrote out the whole thing, plot and PWP and all, I'd totally read it and fav it-- *bricked*)

[askerian]

XDD;; Aw, I don't like schoolfic plots or I might. I like the Kyuubi backstory. But the school life side of it would bore me to tears...

... Unless I made it into a magic school. Or a psy powers school. Or a cyborg school. Or maybe a space pilots school. THEN it might be interesting... >_>

...

... NO. NO BRAIN. DOWN. I SAID NO.

[kohikari.livejournal.com]

8D Sounds interesting~

But I can wait until Teamwork/cyborg-thing/space-mermaids/etc. are done with to poke at anything else like that. ^^ Your stories are addictive enough already, we need you to be able to finish them so we can get our fixes without you spontaneously combusting from too many Fibonacci bunnies.

[edenfalling]

I love your brain.

[askerian]

u.u;;;; Thank you.

[yoscuuro.livejournal.com]

xDDD

I'll tell you something my grandma told me about writing; Murder your darlings.
The thing is, there -can- be plot to your PWPs. You just have to keep it to yourself. :3

[askerian]

Yeah, but I have to put some of it in so things make sense, and how much is too much? ;_;

It's great advice though. ^__^ too bad i've got that verbal diarrhea problem... >_>;;;;;

[yoscuuro.livejournal.com]

You could always have Naruto's thoughts drift towards the problem, hinting heavily, and then have him cut it off cuz he doesn't want to think about it. And you can always have Sasuke mumble a few corroborative things into his neck while he gnaws bites nibbles does stuff. *.*

*coff* just a suggestion, tho. ^^;;;;;;;;;

and yeah, seems like that's been going around lately; ended up giving my teacher three pages instead of five paragraphs, recently. <.<;;;

[askerian]

But if I HINT then it means there's a PLOT and I need to WRITE IT. except then my lazyitis takes over and i don't write anything at all. *loses* *really loses* ToT

ahahaha. ♥♥♥

[yoscuuro.livejournal.com]

xDDD
I know the feeling and I understand you need to write it; the trick is to not. ;3
Although, I get the feeling this is just one of those things you have to beat yourself into submission about. You know exactly how to, it's just that you choose not to in that weird level between subconscious and knowing-exactly-what -you're-doing. Just like me. xD

[askerian]

XD;;;; Turn it off? I don't know hooooooow.

bunny: *flatted* x___x
Thank you, dear. ♥

[(Anonymous)]

You too, huh? And everyone wonders why I take so long to update. I get this GREAT idea for a scene... but it's like five chapters in the future... so I got to write back story... but I want to get that GREAT SCENE... but all those pages- ah screw it. *loads up Age of Empires 3... for the eighth billion time*
Armina Skitty

[askerian]

Yeah. It's horrible, too many "what if?" all the time are really bad for fast writing. XD

[alexandrukas.livejournal.com]

And I thought I was the only one that happened to.... well except I load up the pr0n when I get frustrated with writing >.>

[illegal-goddess.livejournal.com]

PWP is often a scene torn out of context. And there is always the "they are already in a relationship and had a fight" trick. XD

[askerian]

;_; But I don't like starting with people already in a relationship. i'm obsessed with "how did it start?", both because it's shiny and because it says a lot about how they are *now*.

[illegal-goddess.livejournal.com]

I prefer to see the start, too -- but it's so much more complicated for the author. :)

:wibble:

[okamikaze.livejournal.com]

I guess The Night doesn't really count. It's a PWP backstory ish type thing that has a backstory (sorta) in the following chapters.

:plots ways to derail your backstory train of thought next time you feel PWPish:

Re: :wibble:

[askerian]

Yah, it really doesn't. Also, it does have context -- they're out as a team, and then they get drunk and have sex. It doesn't jump right in bed, it's still got some buildup.

Before "Kiss Me, Stupid" (which is borderline character-study-disguised-as-porn in a few places), the last PWP-ish story I tried to write was Crossed Wires, see how well *that* turned out... >_>

Re: :wibble:

[okamikaze.livejournal.com]

Yeaaaaah. You think too much about plot sometimes it seems. XD That should be your next challenge- write a PWP and not turn it into a fic.

OH! On a totally unrelated note- I'm finally getting my butt up and reading your Mermaids IN SPACE~! Fic. :heart: I love it so far.

[nev-longbottom.livejournal.com]

Dude, I read the first paragraph, thought, mmmmmm xxxHolic porn. There you went to Sasuke and Naruto and I lost you. But the backstory brought me joy?

[askerian]

Sorry, i'm not into xxxHolic. ALAS. If it inspires you, you can steal the shower-bunny. It's not like it's original enough in itself to bother me. XD

♥

[mydarkseclusion.livejournal.com]

*lurker* xD

And this is why you are my absolute favorite author ever. EVER.

BTW... can I be added to the porn filter? >.> My personal journal is already on there, I think, but I'm starting to use this one more than that one lately.

[askerian]

#._______.# ♥

re-added! ^^

[venia.livejournal.com]

*laughs!* ^^ That could help me go past PWPs. I can never write more than a oneshot, and even there, it's not convincing at all. For example

--Okay, schoolfic AU. Everyone needs to write at least one, right?
->Right.
->Why is Naruto coming in the locker room after everyone else is long gone?

me: Well...he DID leave with his group, but then got back because he had forgotten something. Yeah. He just remebered.
*imagines scene*
Naruto: Shit!if I don't get it back X will kill me!

->But why is Sasuke there too?

me: .____. err..he wasn't really waiting for Naruto, but once he saw him he changed plans. The real reason he over-stayed was...let's say HE had detention from class.

->for coming late? O_o Uchiha Sasuke, late??

me: fine! let's say he had a fight.

->Uchiha Sasuke, fighting?

me: ...-.-* you're starting to get on my nerves...YES, he fought, but it was for the idiot's sake and Naruto doesn't know it. And Sasuke is pissed for having gone out of his way to protect him indirectly.

There. LET'S WRITE THE LEMON NOW pX

[askerian]

LMAO. Oh man it would be so much faster if my brain worked like that. XDDDD ♥

[bootoye.livejournal.com]

Hey an AU school fic based on the last Shippuden ED video would be awesome!

Use the pics/doujinshi-scenes as backstory and continue from there! ^_______^


*don't hit me!*

[oxbonkus.livejournal.com]

B-but plot is so much hotter than PWP! D= Why can't people realize this? *sniffle* But you've seen the light, hee. This is why you're worshipped, woman!

[questofdreams.livejournal.com]

ROFL... damn that back story!! PWP without justification, especially an odd pairing, just doesn't sit right with me!

But your train of thought was the real story anyway, XD

[sara-the-lazy.livejournal.com]

*giggles* That was great.

PWP is the hardest thing for an author who always writes emotion/character/plot-driven stories. I love how even your "porn" has so much depth to it, and though seeing a PWP from you would be interesting, it just isn't the best use of your writing skills! If it's too hard, you don't have to try... but if you want to broaden your horizons you'll have to keep struggling with this :)

~Sara