Barbarians are srs bizness.

[askerian]

After a long study of the customs of the Common Barbarian, I have determined two laws:

-The more spikes, blades, and edges there are on your armor, the more badass you are.
Corollary: The more serrated the spike, blade or edge is and the more evil you are.

-The less armor you wear, the more badass you are.
Corollary: Fur boots do not affect your badass quotent, as long as they don't go much farther up than your knee.
Corollary: You may not wear zero armor. If you are naked or wearing only almost nonexistent fluttery veils, you are probably a slave.

Therefore I conclude that the most badass barbarians ever to walk this Earth (or other Earths) are those who embrace the badassitude of armored pasties.

The scariest motherfucking overlord ever rose to that position only after adding spikes to her nipple-guards.

(It turns out heavy steel is bad for pneumatic firmness.)




aaaaa i wanna sleep but i have a meeting this afternoon aaaaaaaaa.


"...And then there's this, which is incredibly embarrassing, and resulted from finding a book with a terrible 70's "woman-in-chain-mail-bikini-clinging-to-a-barbarians-leg" type cover." See? this is all saro's fault

Comments

[sarolynne.livejournal.com]

...I love my tag. XD

[askerian]

That's because you're a ho. u.u ♥

[joisbishmyoga.livejournal.com]

What about the ones whose sole armor is a teeny-tiny leather thong studded with spikes around the waistband and crotch? (Framing a very large spike with more spiky bits right in the lower center, perhaps? To add capslock TERROR to the terrified raepbait villagers?)

[askerian]

Hmmmm.

Maybe if they cut off a breast too. Like the amazons.Otherwise it's a bit, you know, sleazy. Nipple pasties would fix that!

[questofdreams.livejournal.com]

... what have you been doing now?! XD

Don't tell me you're going to write an AU about this!? >_>;;

[askerian]

oh god no. XD

It was all Saro's fault as usual. She's been drawing things.

[pegunicent.livejournal.com]

Serrated saw edges on the rim of the pasties and jagged twist horn type spikes denote evil warrior woman? Barbed wire thong.

[askerian]

... Man, serrated edges on the rims, that would REALLY prove you're hardcore. D: *protects boobs* I think i'm gonna go for the forces of good barbarianism... yeah.

[rushthatspeaks.livejournal.com]

Ahahahahaha.

In Berserk, which I have just been reading, there is a Scary-Ass Female Demon who literally only wears a thong shape made by the tips of her own wings crossed in front of her strategically. It's kind of amazing.

[askerian]

Aha, yes, i remember that demoness. Wondering why she even bothers. XD

Man, I love Berserk, but the plot's been going so SLOW in recent chapters, and it really doesn't help that the author posts like one chapter every six months; x_x

[sparklemagpie.livejournal.com]

jlskafj..... I.... you....

>_> May I metaquotes you on this?

[askerian]

#.____.# Oh my. Sure, go ahead!

[sparklemagpie.livejournal.com]

Sweet! Thanks! (http://community.livejournal.com/metaquotes/7153723.html)

[bradhicks.livejournal.com]

Here via metaquotes, and all I can add is to add to the second-to-last sentence, "... and her name was Wendy O. Williams."

[rochan01.livejournal.com]

LOL! I think you are right. I've never quite been able to figure out the steel spike high heeled shoes either...no way they can fight, so maybe these evil empresses rule and dominate by causing sheer sexual terror!

Hm, maybe this explains Madonna's (http://www.bbc.co.uk/totp2/ugotthelook/images/madonna.jpg) "look". Attempt at world domination!