@_@

[askerian]

holy fuck.

Friend of: 404

404 of you. 404 people watching me.

... wow. *is dead, yes* i'm having some trouble wrapping my mind around that. it's. yeah. a lot. omg stalkers everywhere D:



*puts on festive hat*

I DECLARE THIS A SPAM POST. Go wild, peoples. questions and discussions and rants and happies, pimp your stuff, other people's stuff, funny links, squee about icons and whatever you want. Make my inbox feel the rough, down and dirty, animal passion love~

... 404. *#@____@#*

Comments

[cerusee.livejournal.com]

First comment!

[askerian]

*snerk*

[aishuu.livejournal.com]

So my computer crashed and I lost most of my draft, but....

I have the most difficult job in Konoha - and no, it's not Hokage. I'm the psychiatrist who gets to decide if a ninja is too crazy for a mission. Not if they're crazy - if they're too crazy. They don't actually call me a counselor. Instead, I'm on the payroll as "shinobi evaluator." Whatever. I'm the last line of defense between the village and yet another ninja going over the edge, and I'll do the job to the best of my ability.

There is a direct correlation between the strength of a shinobi and how insane they are. Granted, to become a shionobi requires a certain amount of insanity, but someone needs to know when to draw the line. I get to decide if their insanity is acceptable. Basically, do they still know how to hold a kunai, and can they be pointed in the right direction. If they become fixated on porn or peeping, big deal. Having a jounin go completely crackers is bad, though. Really screwed up Orochimaru, but I was still new at the time.

I've done better since, though there was a rather unpleasant episode with Uchiha Itachi. Still, my efforts are why Idame Ukyou isn't a village-wide name (when a ninja starts obsessing with fire, it's never a good thing) and why Morino Ibiki is still considered active-duty personnel. It's a delicate balancing act, and I often don't get cases until it's nearly too late.

Doesn't mean I always enjoy it, though. Shinobi tend to be the paranoid type, as the series of kunai marks in my wall can attest. It's always the ones that need help the most that are the most disagreeable. When I heard Uchiha Sasuke was spotted in town dressed in drag, I took a handfill of asprin, knowing the problem was somehow going to land in my lap.

[a-white-rain.livejournal.com]

Really screwed up Orochimaru, but I was still new at the time.

I've done better since, though there was a rather unpleasant episode with Uchiha Itachi.

When I heard Uchiha Sasuke was spotted in town dressed in drag, I took a handfill of asprin, knowing the problem was somehow going to land in my lap.
Genius.

[askerian]

Yeah, I almost made one but couldn't think of any. *sucks*

/spam

[flusterdance.livejournal.com]

At breakfast the next morning, my Dad was quiet enough that I knew that he and my Mom had had a Talk about what he would and would not say to my new friend. Andy poked nervously at his plate of eggs and toast, occasionally glancing up at the rest of us.

“So, did you boys sleep well?” My mom asked brightly. I heard my Dad choke on a mouthful of food.

“Um. Fine, thank you,” Andy said, staring at his plate.

“I slept on the floor,” I reminded the table at large, looking at my Dad.

“As your mother will no doubt note, I did not, in fact, say anything,” he said stiffly.

Mom kept her smile pasted on. “So do you two have any plans for today?”

“We’re going to see Andy’s sister,” I said. We’d talked it over the night before; we would go out to Andy’s house and make sure his sister was all right, and then try to get her to come back with us to town. If nothing else, we could at least have a doctor look at her. I wasn’t exactly sure what to tell my Dad yet. While lying on the floor thinking about it, telling him that my new friend’s sister was a babbling lunatic seemed less and less like a good idea.

“Oh? Won’t that be nice,” Mom said, loading Andy’s plate up with more food. “You should eat more, dear, there’s a good boy.”

Andy’s ears were glowing with embarrassment. “Mom,” I said, trying to spare him from my mother’s mission to make everyone on the continent clean their plates. “Please. We’d better get going.”


It calls to you. (http://leviathan.nerdnet.org/eclipsehome.html)

Re: /spam

[askerian]

Oh hey. Original fiction? What is it about? ^__^ (the excerpt helped a bit but -- needs more details! XD)

[crazy-toffee.livejournal.com]

*slips in, licks yer nose* Puuurrrr *slips out and back to work*

[askerian]

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

[reimars.livejournal.com]

Surely someone is going to make an "error" crack about this....

[askerian]

YOU DELETED YOUR ERROR POST. ;__;

... IRONY.

rants

[a-white-rain.livejournal.com]

why do people think that Naruto is an innocent angel and the ultimate uke?

Re: rants

[crazy-toffee.livejournal.com]

*lifts finger, opens mouth*


.... no idea.

[sailor-comet.livejournal.com]

::spams?::

[askerian]

::spammed!!:: D:

[miwa.livejournal.com]

Yay 404!

I'm trying to keep from making an 'error' joke.

[crazy-toffee.livejournal.com]

*reloads page anyway*

[aconite.livejournal.com]

You are so loved!

[a-white-rain.livejournal.com]

SPARKLES.

[na-no-nai.livejournal.com]

INBOX RAPE!! UNF! UNF! XD

Seriously though, congrats! :)

[askerian]

It's not rape if it's asking for it. The slut.

thank you! *dances*

[arabesque]

INBOX RAPE UNF~

[askerian]

MMMMMM.~~~~~ ♥

[a-white-rain.livejournal.com]

I just want to use my new Neji icon.

[askerian]

ohh HOT baby.

... and I have the perfect icon to reply, too. XD

Drabble Request!

[sarolynne.livejournal.com]

sarolynne: You know--randomly, sort of, because I just looked at that last picture you put up--somehow, it makes me think of like... a girl with a pair of monster dogs on chains. Oh, hey, they bite. But they love me.

sarolynne: I make no sense sometimes.

askerian: *_*

askerian: stop bunnying me

sarolynne: What? 9.9

sarolynne: XD

sarolynne: *innocent*

sarolynne: ...You know, I think it's Sasuke's look. It reminds me of a dog going, "You won't get anywhere near my person." ...That, and the collar.

--Drabble Request: Naruto and Sasuke as Sakura's vicious pet dogs. However literally or figuratively you want to take that.

OH YES SOMEONE DO IT PLZ ;___;

[askerian]

;______; plzplzplz someone drabble it for meeeeeeee

[shadowlilly.livejournal.com]

Congrats! You are a lovely writer and artist. It is easy to see how you have so many friends.

[askerian]

##^______^## thank you very much! *dances*

Is it rape or is it questionable consent?

[stripedpetunia.livejournal.com]

...

I LIKE KITTENS.

AND PORN.

...

THE END.

Re: Is it rape or is it questionable consent?

[a-white-rain.livejournal.com]

best story ever. plz update soon.

[complexphoenix.livejournal.com]

*Gets out appropriate icon*

*Jumps your inbox, whee!*

Yay for orgies with Asuka's inbox!!

[askerian]

hahaha XD

Mmm, orgies.

[telrunya.livejournal.com]

Wow, that's a lot of friends xD.

*Spam inbox with LOVE*

*runs*

[askerian]

*is spammed*

DDD:

*secretly likes it*

[smoking-panda.livejournal.com]

You're just that neat! ^-^ *bows*

[askerian]

##.___.## ♥

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

So, the other day, Naomi Watts was in our office because she was giving a press conference. I've decided that of the many hot celebrities we've seen in our office, she rates second on the Seriously Hot list. Yes, above Angelina Jolie and Nicole Kidman. Only slightly below Miss Universe... uhh, 2004 I think.

The point is, mmmmm, Naomi Wattalicious.

And, while I'm here, I'll pimp my own stuff, because I can. If you're looking for something funny on the internet, it might well be found here. (http://chaosvizier.livejournal.com/28989.html)

[askerian]

Hee! XD I so totally went through your list before. *stalks remorselessly, y0* Thanks anyway, there were some items I didn't check out yet... Mmm, internet. So many fun ways to completely waste your time.

[aurorn.livejournal.com]

You draw "purdy" pictures and write some awesome stories. That's why I watch, but don't usually say anything... *is a lurker, but not a stalker*

[askerian]

#^__^#

yeah, I remember you. It's your screen name, it's pretty. :3 (also at the top of the "friends of" list. XD) stalkeeeer. ♥

[dirtyoldlady.livejournal.com]

That's a lot of people! Your inbox may never be the same. :D

[askerian]

My inbox likes it rough. u.u;

[scorpionocean.livejournal.com]

SPAM. Congratulations yo

[askerian]

ohhhh sexay~ She looks so badass. XD

[windandwater.livejournal.com]

♥

That's all I need to say you huge attention h0r.

[scribe-protra.livejournal.com]

I am in the Danny Phantom fandom right now and you'll propably like the pairings I don't but *damn* do I want you to write hot gay porn for it.

[askerian]

Heee. #^^#

What's the story about? *doesn't know anything about danny phantom at all* XD