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Sunlightverse - Definitely the Hunted (eridan/nepeta, karkat)
Sequel to the meme's previous Eridan/Nepeta.
--
-- caligulasAquarium [CA] changed his status to caligitaken! --
CG: WHAT.
-- caligulasAquarium [CA] is idle! Message: Mroww, mangy stray cat has clawws <3< --
CG: NO, SERIOUSLY, YOU NEED TO TELL ME WHAT.
CG: BEFORE THE GRUESOME EXPLOSION OF MY PAN SHOWERS THE WHOLE ISLAND IN FLAMING, PUTRID DEBRIS.
CG: ERIDAN? ERIDAN, YOU SAD LUSUS DIDDLER.
--
-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] trolled arsenicCatnip [AC] --
CG: NEPETA.
AC: :33 << *ac is surpurrised karkitty is pouncing her first and gasps a little bit*
AC: :33 << its a nice surpurrise though. hi!
CG: YEAH, WHATEVER, HI.
CG: LOOK, I ALMOST DON'T WANT TO ASK.
AC: :33 << *ac tilts her head patiently and purrs encouraging cg to share*
AC: :33 << *she offers a cushion for cg to sit on and kneads her own into a pleasant shape*
CG: I ALWAYS MANAGE TO BLOT OUT OF MY MIND THE MOST PAINFULLY RIDICULOUS ASPECTS OF TRYING TO HOLD A HALFWAY PRODUCTIVE CONVERSATION WITH YOU.
CG: LET US HOPE AMNESIA WILL STRIKE FAST THIS TIME AROUND.
CG: KARKAT SITS ON THE GODDAMN CUSHION AND WONDERS WHAT KIND OF ASSHOLE DOESN'T HAVE CHAIRS AND WHEN THE FLOOR WAS LAST SWEPT FOR DUST BECAUSE HOLY SHIT GRAY INDOOR SNOW SHOULD NOT BE A THING.
CG: IT'S ABOUT THIS GLORIOUS PIECE OF SPONGE-MELTING IDIOCY.
CG: caligulasAquarium [CA] is idle! Message: Mroww, mangy stray cat has clawws <3<
AC: :OO << ohhh!!! :DD
CG: TELL ME HE INADVERTENTLY GOT HIMSELF INTO AWKWARLY HITTING ON YOUR CAVE LIONESS OF AN ANCESTRESS AND THINKING SHE IS LAUGHING OUT OF RAGE AT HIS CUNNING PLANS.
AC: :33 << sorry cg i cant tell you that!
AC: :33 << *ac cant take a picture of her wall as the panel is still in progress but she is happy to reproduce the writing for her furiend*
AC: X33 << *it reads HUNTRESS SHIPPURR <3< LOVEBANE OTH FUREVER.*
CG: OH NO.
AC: :33 << *and underneath can be read in nice bright still drippy red:*
AC: :33 << CANON!!!
CG: NO NO NO. I REFUSE THIS REALITY. THIS IS THE WRONG REALITY. THIS REALITY IS BROKEN. I DEMAND A REFUND.
AC: :33 << its not broken! its purrfect.
CG: NO BUT SERIOUSLY, ERIDAN BROBACKSTAB HOPESLAYER DESPERATE AMPORA?
CG: BUT HE'S
CG: I CAN'T EVEN FIND THE WORDS.
CG: CAN YOU IMAGINE HOW CATASTROPHICALLY WEIRD SHIT HAS TO BE BEFORE I MISPLACE THOSE.
AC: :|| << selfish and loathsome and he cant f33l anything for anyone not HIS OWN DUMB SELF??
AC: >:|| << AND HE DOESNT EVEN HATE ME BACK HES JUST USING ME FOR A CHANCE AT A PAIL! >:((
AC: :33 << i hate him so much karkitty. its like everything he is is so wrong i just n33d to bite it into pieces!
AC: :33 << but hes also got a really nice butt. ://
CG: HUH.
CG: YEAH, POINT. A SAD, ASHAMED POINT WHO FEELS VERY DIRTY IN ITS LITTLE POINT SOUL, BUT A POINT ALL THE SAME.
AC: :33 << i guess ill just have to make him hate me!
AC: :33 << *ac says while licking her paw and cleaning her whiskers all the while smiling mysteriously*
CG: WELL, IF YOU GO IN WITH THAT SORT OF MINDSET.
CG: I GUESS YOU'VE JUST STARTED DATING, ANYWAY, THERE'S TIME FOR HONEST LOATHING TO DEVELOP.
CG: I SEE YOU'VE GOT A PLAN FOR THAT ALREADY, AND BOY DO I KNOW HOW ANNOYING YOU CAN GET WHEN YOU PUT YOUR MIND TO IT, SO... GOOD LUCK?
AC: :33 << :DD
AC: :33 << *ac rubs the top of her head against her friends shoulder and purrs very loudly*
AC: :33 << *she is purry happy he believes in her!*
AC: :33 << *this deserves a grooming she says and starts licking cg clean*
CG: AND ON THAT SLOBBERY NOTE.
-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] ceased trolling arsenicCatnip [AC] --
--
-- caligulasAquarium [CA] changed his status to caligitaken! --
CG: WHAT.
-- caligulasAquarium [CA] is idle! Message: Mroww, mangy stray cat has clawws <3< --
CG: NO, SERIOUSLY, YOU NEED TO TELL ME WHAT.
CG: BEFORE THE GRUESOME EXPLOSION OF MY PAN SHOWERS THE WHOLE ISLAND IN FLAMING, PUTRID DEBRIS.
CG: ERIDAN? ERIDAN, YOU SAD LUSUS DIDDLER.
--
-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] trolled arsenicCatnip [AC] --
CG: NEPETA.
AC: :33 << *ac is surpurrised karkitty is pouncing her first and gasps a little bit*
AC: :33 << its a nice surpurrise though. hi!
CG: YEAH, WHATEVER, HI.
CG: LOOK, I ALMOST DON'T WANT TO ASK.
AC: :33 << *ac tilts her head patiently and purrs encouraging cg to share*
AC: :33 << *she offers a cushion for cg to sit on and kneads her own into a pleasant shape*
CG: I ALWAYS MANAGE TO BLOT OUT OF MY MIND THE MOST PAINFULLY RIDICULOUS ASPECTS OF TRYING TO HOLD A HALFWAY PRODUCTIVE CONVERSATION WITH YOU.
CG: LET US HOPE AMNESIA WILL STRIKE FAST THIS TIME AROUND.
CG: KARKAT SITS ON THE GODDAMN CUSHION AND WONDERS WHAT KIND OF ASSHOLE DOESN'T HAVE CHAIRS AND WHEN THE FLOOR WAS LAST SWEPT FOR DUST BECAUSE HOLY SHIT GRAY INDOOR SNOW SHOULD NOT BE A THING.
CG: IT'S ABOUT THIS GLORIOUS PIECE OF SPONGE-MELTING IDIOCY.
CG: caligulasAquarium [CA] is idle! Message: Mroww, mangy stray cat has clawws <3<
AC: :OO << ohhh!!! :DD
CG: TELL ME HE INADVERTENTLY GOT HIMSELF INTO AWKWARLY HITTING ON YOUR CAVE LIONESS OF AN ANCESTRESS AND THINKING SHE IS LAUGHING OUT OF RAGE AT HIS CUNNING PLANS.
AC: :33 << sorry cg i cant tell you that!
AC: :33 << *ac cant take a picture of her wall as the panel is still in progress but she is happy to reproduce the writing for her furiend*
AC: X33 << *it reads HUNTRESS SHIPPURR <3< LOVEBANE OTH FUREVER.*
CG: OH NO.
AC: :33 << *and underneath can be read in nice bright still drippy red:*
AC: :33 << CANON!!!
CG: NO NO NO. I REFUSE THIS REALITY. THIS IS THE WRONG REALITY. THIS REALITY IS BROKEN. I DEMAND A REFUND.
AC: :33 << its not broken! its purrfect.
CG: NO BUT SERIOUSLY, ERIDAN BROBACKSTAB HOPESLAYER DESPERATE AMPORA?
CG: BUT HE'S
CG: I CAN'T EVEN FIND THE WORDS.
CG: CAN YOU IMAGINE HOW CATASTROPHICALLY WEIRD SHIT HAS TO BE BEFORE I MISPLACE THOSE.
AC: :|| << selfish and loathsome and he cant f33l anything for anyone not HIS OWN DUMB SELF??
AC: >:|| << AND HE DOESNT EVEN HATE ME BACK HES JUST USING ME FOR A CHANCE AT A PAIL! >:((
AC: :33 << i hate him so much karkitty. its like everything he is is so wrong i just n33d to bite it into pieces!
AC: :33 << but hes also got a really nice butt. ://
CG: HUH.
CG: YEAH, POINT. A SAD, ASHAMED POINT WHO FEELS VERY DIRTY IN ITS LITTLE POINT SOUL, BUT A POINT ALL THE SAME.
AC: :33 << i guess ill just have to make him hate me!
AC: :33 << *ac says while licking her paw and cleaning her whiskers all the while smiling mysteriously*
CG: WELL, IF YOU GO IN WITH THAT SORT OF MINDSET.
CG: I GUESS YOU'VE JUST STARTED DATING, ANYWAY, THERE'S TIME FOR HONEST LOATHING TO DEVELOP.
CG: I SEE YOU'VE GOT A PLAN FOR THAT ALREADY, AND BOY DO I KNOW HOW ANNOYING YOU CAN GET WHEN YOU PUT YOUR MIND TO IT, SO... GOOD LUCK?
AC: :33 << :DD
AC: :33 << *ac rubs the top of her head against her friends shoulder and purrs very loudly*
AC: :33 << *she is purry happy he believes in her!*
AC: :33 << *this deserves a grooming she says and starts licking cg clean*
CG: AND ON THAT SLOBBERY NOTE.
-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] ceased trolling arsenicCatnip [AC] --
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xD Oh dear lord, this is just too rich. This is why I love this ship. It is the fluffiest blackrom ever.
*efur
LOVEBANE. I can't breathe. xD
Hmm, did you mean for Nepeta to type :)) instead of :33?
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huh, yeah, :33 is already a smiling face. HMMM.
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Yeah.
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thank you, dear. ^^
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In no particular order:
OMG HOMESTUCK (this is a refrain and should be stuck in between like every other word I say right now);
nobody ships my ships;
everybody seems to ship things I actively don't ship;
even the author has failed to notice how awesome my favorite character is, like, it's now canonical that Hussie didn't notice;
why is half the fandom I can find writing John/Dave in human settings or human AUs;
I should be the change I want to see but DEAR FUCK CODING CHATLOGS AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH not to mention typing the quirks;
your stuff is a blessed ray of HAVING TROLL BIOLOGY AND THE WAY THEY THINK in the middle of it all;
also OMG HOMESTUCK.
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WHAT DO YOU SHIP you must tell me. also your fave character. Yes.
I continue being fucking baffled at the human no sburb johndave. it's like, wow, shipping two normal white guys in normal school doing
clichenormal dating stuff THAT SO TOTALLY COULD NOT HAPPEN IN ANY OTHER FANDOM EVER.Also this: http://puppetfetishist.livejournal.com/4071.html
also this: http://miffthefox.info/trollme/index.html (not up to date on some characters but)
also this: http://edenfalling.livejournal.com/593075.html
The rest does require a lot of mass replace-all. But. Doable.
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My favorite character is Feferi. Because she has made AWESOME LIFE CHOICES. Feferi? Is not the Condesce. She has every reason to be. She is genetically identical, she has the political options, she is favored of the Eldritch Icky Thing, she has the bloodthirstiness, she has the lack of remorse when nastiness is what must go down (see: feeding other kids' lusii to her lusus). And she DECIDED NOT TO GROW UP LIKE THAT. Because IT IS A BAD IDEA. Feferi is a triumph of individual personality and choice over both nature and nurture. I mean even Meenah-- and Meenah's pretty awesome-- is actively trying to be the Condesce, but Feferi isn't. And Feferi is also a fascinating example of someone who is basically evil, just, that's the way she thinks, who has managed to change the way she acts enough that nobody notices she used to be evil until they trip over a reminder like the fact that she doesn't understand why the horrorterrors freak people out so much. You don't get characters like that in fiction very often!
Hussie failed to notice how cool that is. This was pretty much confirmed to me in one of the video game sequences. Sigh.
Stuff I ship:
John <3 Vriska. He brings out an actual good side to her! Also I would like to join the Society To Keep Vriska And Tavros Away From Each Other At All Costs They Make Each Other Worse Gah.
I am kind of with the fandom on Rose <3 Kanaya and Dirk <3 Jake but would like more complexity there because both of those are not going to be easy relationships.
Past Karkat <3< Future Karkat WHY DON'T MORE PEOPLE WRITE THIS IT'S PRACTICALLY CANON. I also like Past Karkat c3< Jade c3< Future Karkat which IS canon dammit. And I have a soft spot for Karkat <3 Meenah.
Gamzee <3< Equius. It's probably wrong of me, but dammit. Also the only people I've seen write this pairing have it as redrom for some reason and WTFFFFF.
Tavros <3 Jade. SO CUTE.
And the major thing I don't ship, even though it is canon, is Karkat <> Gamzee because we have seen them interact like not at all since The Great Shooshing. It's one of those things where it could be a great relationship if they put time and effort into it, but in canon I have not seen evidence of them doing that, so it looks to me more as though Karkat flung himself on an exploding clown. And I say this as a person who is quite fond of Gamzee.
Although also a person who has the terrible, mentally distressing ficbunny that since Gamzee is the Bard of Rage, and aspects in Homestuck include command over and are affected by their opposites, I should write a thing where literally anybody could have shooshed Gamzee, and he could literally shoosh anybody, it just doesn't occur to anyone to think of it except Karkat because he is like that. So it's not a moirallegiance, it's a metaphysical glitch. The problems are a) ow I don't want to write that and b) can't prove is not canon.
... thank you for letting me go on and on and on. I have honestly considered starting a tumblr just for this fandom, because, well. THIS FANDOM.