askerian: Serious Karkat in a red long-sleeved shirt (Naruto_Kyuubi Rawr)
askerian ([personal profile] askerian) wrote2007-02-19 04:40 pm

OMIGAD IZZAT SUM TEAMWORK??!?!!1

I feel like it drags on a bit toward the middle, but that might be because i spent way too long on it. I'll see if I still feel like that later. ~_~ also suggestions spelling grammar blahblah plz thank u ♥



"Hey, Naruto... You're..." Sakura trailed off, but her meaning was clear enough, as clear as the way she was staring at his face -- fangs and slit pupils and widened whiskers marks, no doubt.

Naruto shrugged and smiled at her. "Foxy? Yep. It's alright." He stepped back, freeing them. "Okay, let's do it. ...Oh hey, Sakura-chan," he added, leering at her, and her hands, clenched on the edges of her robe, "I didn't realize you needed to get naked. Niiiice."

Sakura recovered enough to glare at him; he grinned back, approving.

"I'm not naked." Huffing, she stepped toward the middle of the dojo, muttering under her breath as her stiff fingers fought with her belt. "I couldn't take a naked ritual seriously, anyway. I would be too embarrassed to do anything but giggle."

Naruto followed, throwing his shirt in a corner and taking his place on the symbol that mirrored hers. "Whaaat? You'd look awesome. Like a priestess of arcane... stuff. Powers beyond man's understanding and all that bull. What do they call it, skyclad? Yeah, you'd look all kinds of nice, naked under the stars."

She rolled her eyes as she took off the robe, revealing a plain sports bra and her usual black biker shorts. They looked a lot nicer with no skirt to obstruct the view.

"I'm a bit out of date as a virgin sacrifice, you know."

"It's alright," Naruto retorted as he stretched his legs and leaned back on his hands casually. "We can sacrifice Sasuke. He's not a virgin either, but the way he acts, I'm sure no one will be able to tell the difference."

Sasuke scowled at him over the edge of the ink bowl where he was mixing in more of his blood. "Oh, go to hell. You talk like you're a slut, but you don't have any more experience than I do."

Naruto snorted, teeth bared in a hard grin. He didn't remember whether Sasuke had Sakura before or after Naruto took him, but Naruto had been Sasuke's first male; and knowing the misanthropic bastard, he was pretty sure he'd be Sasuke's last even if Naruto died tomorrow. "Sure I do."

"Porn magazines don't count as experience. If that were the case, every prepubescent brat raiding his parents' closet for a laugh would be a sex guru."

In that light, memories of Kyuubi's sex life probably didn't count either, even if he remembered way too many sounds, scents and feelings to compare simple photographs to them. He grinned anyway, with even more teeth. "I got a blowjob once. Top that, bitch."

Sasuke just stared at him, the brush he was using to mix the ink coming to a stop. Naruto's fangy grin widened.

"You can't, eh? Ha! I win."

Sasuke started mixing his stuff again. "I'm trying to figure out who would get anywhere close to your dick of their own will, but it's not computing."

Naruto snuck a glance at Sakura. She was sitting in her spot and biting her lip, and didn't seem inclined to say anything. Damn. Naruto had hoped she would interrupt them. He grumbled under his breath, "It was a prostitute, during a trip with Jiraiya."

Sasuke smirked thinly, like he didn't need to add anything to that.

Naruto growled. "Shut up, I still win."

"Um, guys, can we--"

"Like hell you win, you had to pay someone."

"Hey! I didn't ask her, she was the one who started it!"

"Because she could tell you were an easy mark!"

"Neither of you wins."

Silence fell in the dojo.

For a little while, at least. "... Uh. What?"

Sakura's cheeks were red, but she didn't back down; if anything, she glared even harder. "Neither of you wins, because I do. There, are you happy? I know I am. I always wanted to win a game of 'who has the biggest penis'." She didn't need to tack on an 'idiots' at the end; her tone came through clear enough.

Naruto was still trying to decide whether to be jealous or ruefully amused when Kyuubi purred out an appreciative laugh. /And now your pink slut only lacks a set of balls to be manlier than your bitch./

Sasuke wasn't so amused. "Wait a minute here. You had sex before -- and you never said anything?"

Sakura sighed wearily. "Listen, it isn't that I'm not happy you're jealous--"

Sasuke twitched. "I'm not--"

"...But this really isn't anything we have time to debate now. All you need to know is that it wasn't anyone from Konoha, and he really, really doesn't matter anymore, didn't even matter as much as I thought back then, and hasn't mattered at all for years. Now can we please get a move on -- preferably before the sun rises? The moon isn't going to wait for us."

Sasuke closed his eyes, and then sighed, deep and slow. Naruto relaxed; Sasuke still didn't look very happy, but apparently the touch of urgency in Sakura's voice had reached him.

"Alright. Later," Sasuke capitulated.

Still on edge, Sakura nodded quickly, hands flitting nervously all over the place. "Yes, yes, afterwards, anything you want to know--"

"The length of his wang?"

"Naruto!"

Naruto grinned. Panic successfully avoided. "Gotta reassure Sasuke that he's bigger, after all."

Sasuke sneered. "I don't have your insecurities, nor your reason to have them."

"Oi--"

This time Sakura didn't need to say anything; her discouraged slump was obvious enough. Naruto sighed in irritation; but he would /fuck/ pummel Sasuke into the ground later.

"Okay, yeah, we're done. Let's get started."

Sasuke's eyebrow twitched at that, but only rolled his eyes briefly and didn't retort anything.

Sakura took a deep breath, and lay down on her back, squirming a little to make herself comfortable on the wooden floor before she went still. Sasuke moved from his cross-legged position to a more formal one, kneeling at her side, back ramrod straight, knees slightly apart. Naruto thought of samurais, and vaguely regretted the T-shirt Sasuke was wearing; formal kimono would have suited him better right now.

Sakura folded her arms to keep them out of Sasuke's way and smiled up bravely. "I'm ready."

"Alright," he replied, brushing his fingers against her arm discreetly.

Naruto propped himself up on his elbow, and watched as Sasuke leaned over Sakura and lifted the brush out of its bowl. Thick black ink dripped on her bare stomach; Naruto purred quietly when the tip of the brush dipped into the ink, and started to glide around her navel with deliberate slowness.

Sasuke started with a spiral reminiscent of Naruto's own, following it with lines of symbols that crawled their way down her hips and sides, connecting her to the array on the floor. The wet, glistening trail highlighted the gentle curves of her body.

"Naruto." Sasuke's tone was absent; he didn't look at the blond. "You should try to meditate. Make sure your chakra flows properly."

Naruto frowned. It was hard to mix his chakra and watch the scenery. But if they thought it would help... grumbling, he gave the tableau a last look and lay down.

On the ceiling, just overhead, there was a quickly penciled doodle of a man, with little schematics of how far apart he should put his feet and where his elbows were allowed to be; it surprised a laugh out of Naruto.

"Hmm?"

"Oh, Sakura-chan, you should be an artist," he teased as he obligingly copied the indicated position.

"What -- oh, that..."

She sounded like she was blushing. Perhaps she would have said more, but Sasuke shushed her; talking made her body move, and he was still painting. Naruto relaxed, contemplating the little fellow. He had a zigzag for hair and actual whiskers that poked out of the sides of his round face.

"Pretty sure my eyes aren't that beady, though."

Sakura stifled a snicker; Sasuke huffed quietly, though he didn't look up. "Naruto... Meditate. You need to be able to control the surge of demonic chakra when we make the connection."

"Yeah, yeah."

He meditated, making himself aware, first of the room -- Sakura and Sasuke's breathing, the soft slide of the brush, the scents inside the dojo, of old sweat and incense and ink, faded presences worn away to a few wisps he might have been imagining -- and then of his body, the slow movement of his lungs and the beat of his heart and the subtle, permanent tension in his muscles -- the way each living cell produced chakra. Slowly, he started channeling that chakra toward his center.

The rasp of clothes and the bare feet padding toward him disturbed his concentration; he opened an eye to see Sasuke leaning over him. "My turn already?"

"Yeah. Shut up and don't move."

Naruto snorted, but the calm from the meditation hadn't entirely left him yet. He closed his eyes again, waiting for the first drop of paint.

It wasn't really cold, but it wasn't warm either; kind of thick, and a little sticky. But then, what had he expected? It was ink and blood.

Sasuke had lost a little too much blood today, between the paint and the barrier around the district, and Naruto knew that Sakura couldn't use her chakra to fix him. But he would hold on until the end; he was too stubborn not to.

"Put your palms flat on the ground."

Naruto obliged, and felt the brush travel up his chest and then down his arm in quick little flicks. It felt weird, ticklish and wet, and too light a touch to do anything but tease. He grinned anyway, eyes still closed. "Nice scenery, huh?"

Sasuke snorted. "Absolutely delightful. Let me concentrate."

Sasuke was soon finished; apart from connecting him to the array through his arms, there wasn't much to paint on Naruto; the bulk of it was going to be on Sakura. Naruto tracked his progress to the corner reserved to the spellcaster through sound.

There was a pause, where even Sakura's breathing stopped.

"... Let's do this."

Naruto chuckled. "Heh. We're waiting on you, bastard."

"This is the stupidest idea we've ever had," Sakura commented from her own corner.

Naruto's smile widened. It hadn't been Sakura's idea at all; but here she was, ready to gamble everything she had on it anyway. It hadn't been Sasuke's idea either, though without him it would have stayed a silly flight of fancy.

He wasn't going to let them down.

He sank into himself, with the sound of their breathing and Sasuke's whispers stretching behind him like a lifeline.

"...Dragon, Snake, Hare, Rooster..."

Sasuke's low voice buzzed in his ears, or perhaps it was the beat of his heart. Slow, but strong; heavy. His chakra ebbed and flowed along with the ancient rhythm, pooling at his center to mix a little red with blue, and then letting it spread along his spine, his legs, his arms, up to the tips of his fingers. It was easy, like the tides -- ebb and flow, ebb and flow...

The darkness under his eyelids slowly turned to green. He wasn't surprised. He took a step toward the cage, water sloshing around his ankles. Fiery red bubbled to the surface with each of his steps.

Their steps.

Mirror. Himself, standing behind the bars, at the edge of the endless dark. A blue glow highlighting a spread of deep grooves on his cheeks. Crimson eyes. A wild, reddish-gold mane. His face. His body, beyond which weaved and slithered nine shadows.

"-- Snake, Ram, Rat --"

They took a last step and paused, meeting their other's eyes, and for a few seconds weren't sure on which side of the bars they were, or even whether that mattered.

What mattered was when the tail -- the power -- snaked through the bars, seeped into his skin, mixed with his own life-force. And then it was his to control. And then a second; and a third. It was heady. It felt so right. A fourth -- and then he reached into the cage and pulled a fifth away from his mirror image. They growled at each other, fangs bared.

"-- Ox, Dragon, Ox, Tiger --"

But there was the child.

When the fifth tail passed under his control, the red eyes' pupils turned round and the scarred cheeks smoothed out.

He -- they -- walked away from the cage, and his footfalls rang twice, and two shadows followed on the green walls. A mountain of burnished fur, evil intent and raw chakra lay still behind him, half-swallowed by the darkness.

"-- Dragon." Silence. "Naruto."

There was a door now, on the opposite wall from the cage, where there had been none before; a human-sized door covered in scribbles that hurt his eyes when he stared. He opened it, watched the ankle-deep, chakra-infused water of his own cage-room flow, spreading down the new corridor.

There was a gate along the way -- a thick metal grill like one might find in a castle, that wouldn't let a human arm pass, never mind a demon's paw.

Somewhere beyond was his child.

He was at the gate before he even wondered if he should, his double-steps echoing like a stampede in the narrow corridor. But the child -- it had been starved of chakra for so long. Was it still growing normally? Was it weakened -- stunted -- dying?

The gate was heavy in his hands; but not heavy enough, once he used one of his tails to brace himself. He pulled, fangs bared. His child. His, his, his. Like hell he would let them make it some sickly little cripple.

He gave a last grunt of effort, the thick, heavy metal bars digging into his hands.

And then triumph -- and tearing, searing pain.

Naruto stumbled alone in the water; and when he threw himself at the falling gate, wisps of red chakra died in his empty hands. The green corridors were ringing with the echoes of Kyuubi's run, and on the walls, his shadow danced, fox and then man and then fox.

"No!" Naruto raged, throwing himself on the barrier. It didn't budge. He stumbled, fell on one knee; everything hurt and was off-kilter and he couldn't think right -- the baby, the baby -- his mate -- Sakura -- he could think enough. Lifting -- he needed to lift it. Enough, just enough -- he stayed on his knees, and when it was at chest-height he wriggled underneath and almost got a foot snapped off and he didn't care, he was hunting.

His baby. His mate. Couldn't let the demon hurt them -- how had he lied to Naruto? They'd been one, how --

Up ahead and all around, there was a woman's scream; and somewhere far beyond the green corridors, Naruto's partner yelled and fell silent.
ext_77486: (OH NOEZ!)

[identity profile] na-no-nai.livejournal.com 2007-02-19 04:26 pm (UTC)(link)
D: Guh, I'm sitting on the edge of my seat. Literally. My face kept inching closer and closer to the monitor with each line there at the end. AND YOU STOPPED THERE? DDD:


Oh, I can't wait to see what's next. I love all their interaction and the changes to the first part. ♥

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[identity profile] beachlass.livejournal.com 2007-02-19 04:31 pm (UTC)(link)
The way I started holding my breath partway through would seem to indicate that it doesn't drag.

*begs for more*

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[identity profile] scorpionocean.livejournal.com 2007-02-19 04:39 pm (UTC)(link)
NOOO CLIFFHANGER! sdfkljasfl, I don't even have an appropriate icon for this amount of horrow

[identity profile] azartti.livejournal.com 2007-02-19 05:42 pm (UTC)(link)
You are sooo mean!!! I need the rest and I can't cry out loud 'cause I'm in classes DD:

[identity profile] crazy-toffee.livejournal.com 2007-02-19 05:57 pm (UTC)(link)
...What? No! Evil!

Best cliffhanger I've seen this year, by far.

On a less fangirly note, I like how you managed to worm in Sakura's 'victory' without disrupting the actual focus of the events unfolding. I also like how Naruto continues to be a total goof, evenwhen he's serious, and he keeps getting a rise out of Sasuke. The interaction between the three of them felt natural, with just the right amount of strain concerning what they were doing, but not strained enough to reflect any lack of faith.

Me like. :D

[identity profile] hakkai-duo.livejournal.com 2007-02-19 06:08 pm (UTC)(link)
ack cliffhanger!!! *looks cute and waits for more* Really good, didn't seem to drag on at all to me... Like you said could be just cause you were looking at it for so long. I just wanna know what happens... @.@

The only thing that seems a bit odd... is the last bit.. took a wee bit of rereading to understand exactly what was going on.... I got it, just took a second so it is probley just me...


Also I never did thank you for looking at my piccy I apreciate it ^.^ *huggle glomps*

[identity profile] silverkiiri.livejournal.com 2007-02-19 06:08 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh what the hell. You are so evil. -_-;

I... I need more. I will fly to france and bring you cookies. I will. But you probably have better cookies. Mine would be cold by the time I got there. International flights will do that. And I would probably get hungry and eat them on the way.

But. virtualCookies. For more. Yesplz.

[identity profile] silverkiiri.livejournal.com 2007-02-19 06:11 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh God I just read the last few paragraphs again.

EVIL WOMAN.

/dies a little

[identity profile] book-people.livejournal.com 2007-02-19 06:45 pm (UTC)(link)
What? NO! It can't end there, it's not allowed! *cries*

Adi

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ext_2686: (Office - your biggest flan)

[identity profile] stripedpetunia.livejournal.com 2007-02-19 07:11 pm (UTC)(link)
The pacing is good and the meditation part doesn't drag. I think you have just enough description there. The drawing on the ceiling that looked like Naruto was cute, too. :3

One thing that bothered me a bit: It wasn't really cold; but it wasn't warm either, and kind of viscous.

It's just that I doubt Naruto has 'viscous' in his vocabulary. I guess he could, but that's not my personal opinion. :D

Well done, need more, plzkthx. ^^

[identity profile] libraire.livejournal.com 2007-02-19 07:25 pm (UTC)(link)
O___O

^THAT'S MY FACE RIGHT NOW. DDD: YOU ARE EVIL.

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[identity profile] bootoye.livejournal.com 2007-02-19 08:13 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah , yeah!! *dance of joy*

Now I'm gonna read it!!^_^

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[identity profile] gothicstargrl.livejournal.com 2007-02-19 09:48 pm (UTC)(link)
>:E

See that emoticon? That is me, desperately wanting to chew on you for ending it there, you evil tease of a woman. (Narutooooo~ ;0; Nothing bad happens to him, right? Right??)

[identity profile] shiryu-yugure.livejournal.com 2007-02-19 10:30 pm (UTC)(link)
*squeaks*

T_T *slinks away*

The suspense. The suspense!

*killed dead of squee and drama*

I want to scream into a pillow but my mom's in the room and I can't do anything but scroll down for the non-existant scene.


Naruto was still trying to decide whether to be jealous or ruefully amused when Kyuubi purred out an appreciative laugh. /And now your pink slut only lacks a set of balls to be manlier than your bitch./


You kill me dead. TWICE. DD:

I think you actually don't have any spelling/grammar errors this time. :D

(Anonymous) 2007-02-19 10:31 pm (UTC)(link)
Can the seal trail over Sakura's hips and lower stomach, can it even mirror Naruto's seal if she's wearing bike shorts? Those things always went up to my navel.
And you don't get anything else until I get the end of this chapter. La bitch.

[identity profile] ina-noranaya.livejournal.com 2007-02-19 10:38 pm (UTC)(link)
Ooh, cliffhanger. I think it did flow right, though; the meditation part certainly wasn't boring. I like your description of what's going on in Naruto's head. And your dialogue is made of win, as always.

Let's see, grammars:
Sasuke was soon finished; apart from connecting him to the array through his arms, there wasn't much to paint on Naruto; the bulk of it was going to be on Sakura. Two semicolons in a sentence is a bit much here; I'd make the part after the second one a separate sentence.

Naruto tracked his progress to the corner reserved to the spellcaster through sound. "reserved for the spellcaster" And "through sound" is a tad awkward--perhaps "by his sound." (Or something even more wordy, like "by the sound he made;" I'm not sure if there's a succinct way to express that in English.) An edit: Thinking about it some more, "through sound" doesn't sound too bad--it's a bit different, but I think I'd keep it.

and for a few seconds weren't sure on which side of the bars they were, or even whether that mattered This could use a little rewording; I'd say "and for a few seconds they weren't sure which side of the bars they were on, or whether that even mattered."

The green corridors were ringing with the echoes of Kyuubi's run Hmm. I'm not sure if "running" would be better here, or if "run" could slip by unnoticed. But "Kyuubi's run" sounds a bit peculiar here--I'm curious as to what other people have to say about it. If no one agrees with me, I'd advise leaving it alone.

I have a tendency to think aloud, so to speak, when I'm typing on the Internet. I'm sure you can see where I've gone back and contradicted myself. Please forgive me if it's confusing; it really did make sense in my head, I promise.

[identity profile] mitsuhachi.livejournal.com 2007-02-19 10:59 pm (UTC)(link)
Shit. I cannot believe you stopped it there. I want to know what happens next!!!T.T

(also, the detail about the ink being mixed with blood rather than water? I really really liked that for some reason. Also the observation about sasuke having lost a lot of blood.)

Cliffhanger? Where?!

[identity profile] slamu.livejournal.com 2007-02-20 12:10 am (UTC)(link)
Ow. I just fell out of my chair.
On the one hand, I'm not suprised. (Kyuubi=Kitsune=trickster=Leave some poor schmuck holding the bag) On the other hand, he just went off to run an errand, right? He'll be back, there's one part of the ritual that he didn't mention to the others. He just went off to get a (beer) rabbit, stretch his legs, come back in plenty of time...
I liked the imagry in the cage/seal/roomthinie with Kyuubi. Rawr.
I like the bit with Kyuubi commenting Sakura's...'masculinity'. (Sasuke=prude) /fuck/ pummel = snerk.

[identity profile] animeprincess.livejournal.com 2007-02-20 01:13 am (UTC)(link)
AFNILGFNIGANRGNWELGAWLG'GBUH. You! EVIL!

*face into kitty side* DAMMIT i can't wait till you have the next part up. Looks great!

x_x *le death*

[identity profile] ktoth04.livejournal.com 2007-02-20 01:18 am (UTC)(link)
U R SO MEAN

O.O

i wanna know what is going on :(

[identity profile] ktoth04.livejournal.com 2007-02-20 01:24 am (UTC)(link)
omg... what is with the anonymous post? holy crap O.O

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[identity profile] phlegmaticphrog.livejournal.com 2007-02-20 01:30 am (UTC)(link)
Omg, I'm so freaked now. This is going to keep me up at night! /sobs

(Anonymous) 2007-02-20 01:22 pm (UTC)(link)
hi, i'm a new reviewer but i've always been a follower of your works from aff and ff.net.. In other words, i've been stalking your works.

I really dunno what to say. My brain is still trying to fix itself up from your evil cliffie. na no nai's icon totally shows what i looked like when i scrolled down and saw the "post comment" thinger. Have i told you you're evil? But i still heart you. Heehee.

About sasuke losing blood thingie, he didnt lose that much blood on the ink or on activating the tags,did he? Cuz, uhhhmm, people would only feel dizzy and weak if they lost about 1-2L of blood, which i think was too much blood to be lost on smudging tags with blood (that's how they activate it right?) or mixing it with ink. But then again, if sasuke hasn't eaten anything yet then... Errr... Right... Nevermind..

Have i told you i heart you? And that i think you're the goddess of all threesomes?(for team7 that is) and that i'll build a shrine in your name with lots and lots of cookie offerings?

-moochie

[identity profile] ryouseiteki.livejournal.com 2007-02-21 12:27 am (UTC)(link)
DDDD:
MEANIE. ;_____;

What haaaaaaaaaaappens? TT______TT
I'm like the first commenter lol, my face was like plastered to the screen. xD

One thing though, when I saw this line
...Naruto's partner yelled and fell silent.
I automatically assumed it was Sasuke becuase they're "partners" in the jutsu and such. But then I second guessed myself and was like, wait when I think of Kyuubi and Naruto the word aibou comes to mind and that means "partner" too. :(

So, I'm a bit confused.
Clear it up for me please? :3

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[identity profile] kane-shi-megami.livejournal.com 2007-02-21 03:25 am (UTC)(link)
HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO US! *falls over*

[identity profile] bookem-dano.livejournal.com 2007-02-21 03:39 pm (UTC)(link)
Naruto - Control of Demon + Sasuke + Lotsa Blood Loss = Dead Sakura and Kyuubi Madness. DDDDDD: Aha 'cept Kyuubi can't kill Sakura, right? Not if he wants teh baby~! :D! And, and! Sasuke can't die either, because... BECAUSE. DDDDDDD:!

*Stares at last line some more* DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD:! </3 Noooes. Eviiillll.

[identity profile] writergirld.livejournal.com 2007-02-23 01:03 am (UTC)(link)
You evil, evil woman.
MORE!

[identity profile] writergirld.livejournal.com 2007-02-23 01:03 am (UTC)(link)
please?

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