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(naruto/HP) crack crossover drabble~
HOHOHO.
"Say, Sakura, could I borrow your -- well, I'll be damned."
Sakura wiped the foam off her face quickly, tilting her hair back a little to make sure that her shampoo wouldn't get in her eyes, and looked questioningly at Mandy Brocklehurst. Her Housemate was blinking at her over the top of the shower stall door.
"Yes?"
"Oh, sorry!" Mandy turned around, laughing a little too loudly, and Sakura squirmed nervously and washed the shampoo off as fast as she could.
"Lisa! It's not a dye job after all!"
Sakura's hand slipped as she was turning the water off and she ended up drenched in cold water. She turned the knob too hard to compensate; it snapped off in her hand. She burst out of the stall, wrapping herself in her towel quickly. "What!" She couldn't have understood that right.
"Well, you know, your hair. Unless you also dye your -- you know, down there?"
Giggles erupted from a few stalls, and two girls peeked out over their doors.
Sakura turned red and pulled the towel tighter around her body. "I certainly don't! and -- will you stop gaping, where's the main faucet-thing, you know -- wait, it would cut off every shower, would it?"
Padma rolled her eyes in amusement and pulled out her wand, pointing it at the broken knob. "Reparo! Seriously, you're such a Muggle sometimes."
Well, damn, there went her diversion.
"Mandy," Su Li intervened, "you seriously lack in observation skills. If she dyed her hair, the water would be tinged pink. It can't be something physical."
"Topical, maybe not; you're right that we would have noticed her applying it -- but it doesn't mean that she hasn't got a potion to drink. That wouldn't have to happen in the shower room."
"Wait -- wait a minute here -- a potion to change my hair color?"
Su, Mandy, Lisa and Padma gave her a strange look. "What's the problem with it?"
"Well, apart from the fact that I'd have to brew it in secret, and it would probably taste nasty... Doesn't that seem -- I don't know -- frivolous to you?"
Lisa coughed. "About that, I'm going to need my book on Love Potions back."
Sakura turned even redder, if that was possible.
"Maybe it's a charm."
"Oh, yes -- or maybe even a transfiguration."
"It's NATURAL, I tell you!"
Lisa waved her down. "Oh, Sakura, we understand that you like the color, and I agree that, while unusual, it does look very pretty on you, but..."
"But what?!"
Behind her, Mandy, Su and Padma were still chattering.
"Are you positive that it wasn't... you know?"
"Well, I didn't STARE, but at first glance, there were no visible roots."
"Hm, yes, probably a transfiguration; a charm would only stay attached to the part of the hair that existed when it was cast... And unless she casts it every morning..."
"Well -- no offense, Sakura -- but it can be a pretty delicate spell, and it shows that she hasn't had much training in subtle wand manipulations..."
"Oh! Is it a botched spell, Sakura?"
"Is that why you didn't want to tell us? It's alright, really--"
"It's not a botched spell! It's not a spell at all!"
The girls gave her a disappointed, admonishing look and kept throwing more and more arcane possibilities at each other, eventually drafting in a few of the other years who had a Muggle background for added possibilities. Sakura groaned, and decided to get dry and dressed, since they didn't seem to need her input.
It was surreal. Here she was, in a shower room with four other girls in varying degrees of nudity, and they were debating potions and charms with the seriousness of Interrogation specialists comparing torture methods. Why hadn't she asked the Hat to place her into Hufflepuff? They would have accepted her without question. Grr.
"I've told you it was my natural color!" she wailed a last time, throwing her hands in the hair. She was this close to tearing out a clump and telling them to run it through as many examinations as they wanted.
Su shook her head. "No offense, Sakura, but unless you're a Metamorphmagus, pink isn't a color you can ever be born with. It's genetically impossible."
"Gene-what?" Padma asked.
"Genetic -- Muggle term, basically all the information that's passed down from your parents' bloodlines at conception, through what's present in the gametes -- the father's seed and the mother's egg. The closest you could come to pink would be Weasley-red. Or maybe strawberry-blond... Say, you wouldn't happen to have Weasley blood, would you?"
Oh, they were addressing her again. She paused in the middle of buttoning up her shirt to look at the little group. "Um, no."
"Oh. Because if you had Fred and George in your family, it could account for a lot."
"Well, I didn't," she growled out through clenched teeth. No one was listening. The Fred-and-George explanation had thrown them onto another tangent; she huffed and turned away. She had a puddle of icy water to mop up.
She was in the process of packing up her things when the sudden hush made her turn around. The girls were stealing glances at her; Su had a hand over her mouth and Padma seemed somewhat chagrined.
"What, now?"
"...Did your parents..." an apologetic wince, "experiment with weird spells... You know, before you were born?"
...Had her pregnant mother been used as a guinea pig for the creation of unnatural hair colors. Huh.
Sakura gave them a stony look and picked up her bag. "... yes. Yes. That's what happened." Maybe now they would stop mentioning it.
"Oh, poor thing! What kind of spell was it? Does it alter color-changing charms? Because I'm sure we could come up with ways to fix it, if you want--"
Okay, that was enough. Cracking her fingers threateningly, she advanced toward the pack of half-naked girls, eyes flashing in anger.
"I happen to like my hair color EXACTLY the way it is, THANK YOU VERY MUCH. Is that a problem for anyone here?"
Mandy looked like she wanted to say something, for a few seconds, and then Sakura's broom snapped in her hands, and then Mandy didn't.
Sakura stomped off before she felt too tempted to stab them with the biggest splinters.
+
"Sasuke-kun...?"
Sasuke grunted, glancing down at her from his seat on the tower's parapet, then turned back to watch over the grounds.
"Does my hair look weird to you?"
Sasuke blinked, and gave her a good long look, disgruntled at being bothered for something so inconsequential. He couldn't see anything out of the ordinary. It wasn't going to turn into one of these classical 'I just left the hairdresser and you didn't even notice!' situations, was it? He wanted to say that it looked like it always did, but -- argh. Maybe random sarcasm would sidetrack her.
"...Not compared to Naruto's. He looks like a chick exploded on his head."
"HEY!" Naruto protested from his perch, two battlements away. "You got a problem with my hair, asshole?"
"No problem, no. I just find it ridiculous."
"You wanna talk ridiculous, duck-butt?"
The two boys jumped on their feet and predictably started fighting on the parapet. Sakura sighed, and turned to face Kakashi.
"Um, Kakashi-sensei... You've traveled more than us... Do you think my hair color is odd?"
Kakashi stared at his book, as if he was contemplating the likelihood that Sakura would believe him if he pretended that he'd been too engrossed in it to hear. Eventually, he shrugged. "For Europe, it's certainly original, though I've seen non-magical people with flashier hair."
He gave Sakura a smile, visible eye curving up, and swept the boys' feet from under them in one kick.
"They just have to accept that our country has more biological variety than they do. Fifty percent of our team has hair colors that are considered unnatural in these parts, after all."
Naruto gave Kakashi a pouty glare and rubbed his smarting butt. "Sensei... For your information, I just think they think you're old."
Kakashi's smile turned a little strained. They could tell, even through the mask; his eyebrow was twitching.
"Why don't we vary the patrols; Naruto, Sasuke, you'll circle the grounds from four AM to eight -- don't be late to class."
"But -- that's the same time as breakfast!" Naruto protested, heartbroken.
Kakashi's smile was now downright sadistic. It wasn't the eyebrow this time; it was just the vibes. "It is, isn't it?"
Growling in annoyance, Sasuke kicked Naruto.
"What is it you're saying, Sasuke? You would love to help Hagrid-sensei feed his pets?"
"... No, sensei," Sasuke muttered reluctantly as Naruto snickered under his breath. "Can we get going now? I'd like to train sometime before tomorrow's patrol. Sensei."
Sakura sighed as she followed them across the roofs. Men, all of them. They really didn't have a clue about how she felt. Oh well, maybe they were right, it was just hair.
Weird hair.
Perhaps a version of the school robes came with a hood.
"Um... Sakura-chan?" Naruto fell back to her height, scratching his neck embarrassedly. "I don't know 'bout your hair being weird, but, um. It's pretty."
She blushed, stammered, and hesitated between hitting him for hitting on her and hugging him for being so dorkily, cutely nice.
"So... How did your Housemates figure out it wasn't a dye job anyway?" he added with a huge, hopeful grin. And then waggled his eyebrows.
Hitting him worked just fine, really.
"Say, Sakura, could I borrow your -- well, I'll be damned."
Sakura wiped the foam off her face quickly, tilting her hair back a little to make sure that her shampoo wouldn't get in her eyes, and looked questioningly at Mandy Brocklehurst. Her Housemate was blinking at her over the top of the shower stall door.
"Yes?"
"Oh, sorry!" Mandy turned around, laughing a little too loudly, and Sakura squirmed nervously and washed the shampoo off as fast as she could.
"Lisa! It's not a dye job after all!"
Sakura's hand slipped as she was turning the water off and she ended up drenched in cold water. She turned the knob too hard to compensate; it snapped off in her hand. She burst out of the stall, wrapping herself in her towel quickly. "What!" She couldn't have understood that right.
"Well, you know, your hair. Unless you also dye your -- you know, down there?"
Giggles erupted from a few stalls, and two girls peeked out over their doors.
Sakura turned red and pulled the towel tighter around her body. "I certainly don't! and -- will you stop gaping, where's the main faucet-thing, you know -- wait, it would cut off every shower, would it?"
Padma rolled her eyes in amusement and pulled out her wand, pointing it at the broken knob. "Reparo! Seriously, you're such a Muggle sometimes."
Well, damn, there went her diversion.
"Mandy," Su Li intervened, "you seriously lack in observation skills. If she dyed her hair, the water would be tinged pink. It can't be something physical."
"Topical, maybe not; you're right that we would have noticed her applying it -- but it doesn't mean that she hasn't got a potion to drink. That wouldn't have to happen in the shower room."
"Wait -- wait a minute here -- a potion to change my hair color?"
Su, Mandy, Lisa and Padma gave her a strange look. "What's the problem with it?"
"Well, apart from the fact that I'd have to brew it in secret, and it would probably taste nasty... Doesn't that seem -- I don't know -- frivolous to you?"
Lisa coughed. "About that, I'm going to need my book on Love Potions back."
Sakura turned even redder, if that was possible.
"Maybe it's a charm."
"Oh, yes -- or maybe even a transfiguration."
"It's NATURAL, I tell you!"
Lisa waved her down. "Oh, Sakura, we understand that you like the color, and I agree that, while unusual, it does look very pretty on you, but..."
"But what?!"
Behind her, Mandy, Su and Padma were still chattering.
"Are you positive that it wasn't... you know?"
"Well, I didn't STARE, but at first glance, there were no visible roots."
"Hm, yes, probably a transfiguration; a charm would only stay attached to the part of the hair that existed when it was cast... And unless she casts it every morning..."
"Well -- no offense, Sakura -- but it can be a pretty delicate spell, and it shows that she hasn't had much training in subtle wand manipulations..."
"Oh! Is it a botched spell, Sakura?"
"Is that why you didn't want to tell us? It's alright, really--"
"It's not a botched spell! It's not a spell at all!"
The girls gave her a disappointed, admonishing look and kept throwing more and more arcane possibilities at each other, eventually drafting in a few of the other years who had a Muggle background for added possibilities. Sakura groaned, and decided to get dry and dressed, since they didn't seem to need her input.
It was surreal. Here she was, in a shower room with four other girls in varying degrees of nudity, and they were debating potions and charms with the seriousness of Interrogation specialists comparing torture methods. Why hadn't she asked the Hat to place her into Hufflepuff? They would have accepted her without question. Grr.
"I've told you it was my natural color!" she wailed a last time, throwing her hands in the hair. She was this close to tearing out a clump and telling them to run it through as many examinations as they wanted.
Su shook her head. "No offense, Sakura, but unless you're a Metamorphmagus, pink isn't a color you can ever be born with. It's genetically impossible."
"Gene-what?" Padma asked.
"Genetic -- Muggle term, basically all the information that's passed down from your parents' bloodlines at conception, through what's present in the gametes -- the father's seed and the mother's egg. The closest you could come to pink would be Weasley-red. Or maybe strawberry-blond... Say, you wouldn't happen to have Weasley blood, would you?"
Oh, they were addressing her again. She paused in the middle of buttoning up her shirt to look at the little group. "Um, no."
"Oh. Because if you had Fred and George in your family, it could account for a lot."
"Well, I didn't," she growled out through clenched teeth. No one was listening. The Fred-and-George explanation had thrown them onto another tangent; she huffed and turned away. She had a puddle of icy water to mop up.
She was in the process of packing up her things when the sudden hush made her turn around. The girls were stealing glances at her; Su had a hand over her mouth and Padma seemed somewhat chagrined.
"What, now?"
"...Did your parents..." an apologetic wince, "experiment with weird spells... You know, before you were born?"
...Had her pregnant mother been used as a guinea pig for the creation of unnatural hair colors. Huh.
Sakura gave them a stony look and picked up her bag. "... yes. Yes. That's what happened." Maybe now they would stop mentioning it.
"Oh, poor thing! What kind of spell was it? Does it alter color-changing charms? Because I'm sure we could come up with ways to fix it, if you want--"
Okay, that was enough. Cracking her fingers threateningly, she advanced toward the pack of half-naked girls, eyes flashing in anger.
"I happen to like my hair color EXACTLY the way it is, THANK YOU VERY MUCH. Is that a problem for anyone here?"
Mandy looked like she wanted to say something, for a few seconds, and then Sakura's broom snapped in her hands, and then Mandy didn't.
Sakura stomped off before she felt too tempted to stab them with the biggest splinters.
+
"Sasuke-kun...?"
Sasuke grunted, glancing down at her from his seat on the tower's parapet, then turned back to watch over the grounds.
"Does my hair look weird to you?"
Sasuke blinked, and gave her a good long look, disgruntled at being bothered for something so inconsequential. He couldn't see anything out of the ordinary. It wasn't going to turn into one of these classical 'I just left the hairdresser and you didn't even notice!' situations, was it? He wanted to say that it looked like it always did, but -- argh. Maybe random sarcasm would sidetrack her.
"...Not compared to Naruto's. He looks like a chick exploded on his head."
"HEY!" Naruto protested from his perch, two battlements away. "You got a problem with my hair, asshole?"
"No problem, no. I just find it ridiculous."
"You wanna talk ridiculous, duck-butt?"
The two boys jumped on their feet and predictably started fighting on the parapet. Sakura sighed, and turned to face Kakashi.
"Um, Kakashi-sensei... You've traveled more than us... Do you think my hair color is odd?"
Kakashi stared at his book, as if he was contemplating the likelihood that Sakura would believe him if he pretended that he'd been too engrossed in it to hear. Eventually, he shrugged. "For Europe, it's certainly original, though I've seen non-magical people with flashier hair."
He gave Sakura a smile, visible eye curving up, and swept the boys' feet from under them in one kick.
"They just have to accept that our country has more biological variety than they do. Fifty percent of our team has hair colors that are considered unnatural in these parts, after all."
Naruto gave Kakashi a pouty glare and rubbed his smarting butt. "Sensei... For your information, I just think they think you're old."
Kakashi's smile turned a little strained. They could tell, even through the mask; his eyebrow was twitching.
"Why don't we vary the patrols; Naruto, Sasuke, you'll circle the grounds from four AM to eight -- don't be late to class."
"But -- that's the same time as breakfast!" Naruto protested, heartbroken.
Kakashi's smile was now downright sadistic. It wasn't the eyebrow this time; it was just the vibes. "It is, isn't it?"
Growling in annoyance, Sasuke kicked Naruto.
"What is it you're saying, Sasuke? You would love to help Hagrid-sensei feed his pets?"
"... No, sensei," Sasuke muttered reluctantly as Naruto snickered under his breath. "Can we get going now? I'd like to train sometime before tomorrow's patrol. Sensei."
Sakura sighed as she followed them across the roofs. Men, all of them. They really didn't have a clue about how she felt. Oh well, maybe they were right, it was just hair.
Weird hair.
Perhaps a version of the school robes came with a hood.
"Um... Sakura-chan?" Naruto fell back to her height, scratching his neck embarrassedly. "I don't know 'bout your hair being weird, but, um. It's pretty."
She blushed, stammered, and hesitated between hitting him for hitting on her and hugging him for being so dorkily, cutely nice.
"So... How did your Housemates figure out it wasn't a dye job anyway?" he added with a huge, hopeful grin. And then waggled his eyebrows.
Hitting him worked just fine, really.
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I have bunnies for a few more, but I don't know if i'll ever find the right mood to write these. It just kinda hit me over the head... ^^;
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I love Sakura. It figured that all the Ravenclaw girls would be insanely curious about the hair. And, being Ravenclaws, it's not like they could just let it go. ^^ And Naruto's little leer at the end was just to cute. I admit, I'd have to wonder too. >.>
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...
*wonders with* O:3 ♥
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Furuba plotbunnies.
Re: Furuba plotbunnies.
Re: Furuba plotbunnies.
Re: Furuba plotbunnies.
Re: Furuba plotbunnies.
Re: Furuba plotbunnies.
Re: Furuba plotbunnies.
Re: Furuba plotbunnies.
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When Sakura says, "What, now?" I think you might want to take out the comma there because it sounds dijointed with the comma.
Also, Kakashi smiling. There's no mention of his mask or his forehead protector. Did he take them off for Hogwarts? If not, a mention of his face could better the piece.
This is an interesting idea, especially the experimenting parents bit. :D
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Kakashi without his mask WOULD merit a mention, but for me, his face pretty much comes with the mask and that's it. XD
I thought it was pretty clear that they read his expressions from the ... seventh? eightth ? of his face that they can actually see, what with the mention of the eyebrow and all. In the manga we have no trouble seeing when Kakashi smiles; his eye curves up. I guess I could mention it, even if it seems a little redundant to me ^^;
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I kept wonndering when something like this would come up!
And: Kakashi's smile turned a little strained. They could tell; his eyebrow was twitching.
... So much love. :D
Write more of these!What? Huh? What subliminal message?no subject
*loves back*~
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Though, in the two places you have George mentioned, you write his name as "Georges"--I think that might be off.
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In french it's always Georges ^^; I shall check the HP lexicon.
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Thank you!
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And come now. Sekritlee, Sakura's hair is in search of it's own identity. It stayed pink because it heard pink was the new pink, and when someone said black is the new pink, it got jealous and manipulated Sakura into an obsessive following of Sasuke, with his beautiful black mane. In the event of their copulation, the pink would overtake the black to prove it's dominance, and thus, Sakura will always be on top and...
I'm shutting up. Having crack-thought-trains makes me a bad bad girl. ^__^;
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... XD XD XD I like that line of thought. *plots fic where Sakura tops Sasuke thoroughly* *and naruto watches. u.u;*
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#^___^#
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Poor Sasuke, trying to figure out if it was one of those trick questions...
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hehe. Can't you just imagine him trying to be tactful, though? and then realizing that he's never going to manage and why the hell is he even trying. XDDD
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And Harry thought *he* had a bad hair day. =D
So much love for this ♥
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♥
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thank you for the comment~
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Whee, Sakura!ness- ..I was just watching the episode where she cuts off her hair and then I read this; today = good.
=)
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and virileof course. *__*hee! that's one of my favorite episodes ever. It's so awesome *^___^*
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I'm glad you find it believable. ^____^
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http://www.fanfiction.net/s/2573257/1/
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omg I was seriously starting to believe you may never get another bunny for this crossover! *running tackles you* squeeeeal!
Oh Sakura, you know we love your hair just as it is. Don't listen to them. XD
Though why I keep getting the image of someone swiping at her hair clips accidentally to see if it's a charm in the hall, or attempting to be discreet as they swipe some of her pumpkin juice in the morning for tests, I do not know. But they make me giggle so it's okay. :P
Poor Sasuke, trying to understand Sakura but failing. It's not your fault she's a girl and has a mind incomprehensible to any guy. *pats him awkwardly*
And OMG that is the first time I've ever heard that comparison of Naruto's hair. *laughs insanely* A chick exploded? zomgluvwhut *dies laughing*
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... oh god, now I can see it, her house trying to steal hair from Sakura and Sakura turning downright paranoid as a result. XD
The comparison isn't my fault, sadly. It's
you're dead!!! O_O
...
*steals your body and drags it to the fridge*
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And, hey, you write what and when you feel like it, durn it! I often wish people respected that more often, because I would really like to be more lazy about my writing. >.< Then again, if I don't force myself to write, nothing will get written. *L*
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yeah, that's the problem. XD and when you leave a bunny too long, sometimes it dies ;_;
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A.S.