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Monthly Word Count - April
TOTAL: 31 358 words.
Less than I was trying for, but how dare my brother get married there in the middle. >__> The lack of big chaptered multipart update is annoying ( a lot of this total is ficlets) but I am still quite satisfied at the total. Good job, self.
POSTED:
-30-th Century Night sequel - four weeks in, Dave POV (3 329 words)
-two 30-th Century Night daemon AU ficlets (1 421 words)
-Crash Standing Daemon AU ficlet (509 words)
-Three Battlefield Terra daemon AU ficlets (5 246 words)
-FF7 Daemon AU: Breon settles (833 words)
-Midnight on the Demon Patrol, Rose prequel, Scourge Summoner (961 words)
-A Troll Not Named Fuckass - DaveJade & Karkat, pet Karkat AU fluff (7959 words)
WORKS IN PROGRESS:
-Three complete pesterlogs for Covalent'verse (2 905 words) (not posting them outside tumblr yet cause i want to write a few more and post them all as a complete narrative.)
-Covalent'verse - chatlog snippets, some spoiler and some to be deleted (418 words)
-Battlefield Terra, main fic (1 119 words)
-Midnight on the Demon Patrol, chapter 16 (3 759 words) (a lot of it porny)
-Midnight on the Demon Patrol snippet that went nowhere (71 words)
-Jade/Dave/Karkat/John/Terezi fluff-porn (2 455 words)
-Attempt at a sequel to Gotta Go Fast Beat'er 2000!! (96 words) (orz)
-Attempt at a daemon AU to Midnight on the Demon Patrol (170 words)
-Attempt at a daemon AU to the karkat gangbang fic (116 words)
--
Covalent 'verse
--
-- twinArmageddons [TA] is no longer idle! --
TA: gue22 what ii found.
AC: :33 < boy tg-or-tt's place? *ac guesses*
CG: IT HAD BETTER BE A DOUCHE IN SHADES.
TA: iit'2 ...
TA: iiiiiit'2 ...
TA: two douche2 iin 2hade2.
AC: :33 < lucky!
CG: YOU INCLUDED OR...?
TA: har har har, kk.
TA: ran iintwo dv on the 2treet, he'd 2een dr'2 hiive two. met a few block2 off iit.
CC: 38D Conc)(gratulations!
AC: :33 < mew? *the kitty says confused* conscratchulations about what? *she asks scratching her head*
TA: yeah thank2 ff, all ii wanted for twelfth periigee'2 eve.
TA: the good new2 ii2 they're *defiiniitely* each other'2 crew.
TA: the bad new2 ii2 2o am ii.
CG: HOW TERRIBLE. I FULLY SYMPATHIZE WITH THE IMMENSE TRAUMATISM OF HAVING AN OBNOXIOUS NOOK PIMPLE IN STUPID EYEWEAR AND A REGRETTABLY BIASED APPRECIATION OF HIS OWN VOICE AS A HATEFRIEND.
CG: HOW WELL DO I KNOW THIS TERRIBLE PAIN.
TA: bluh bluh 2hut up. anyway we're all three 2afely at dr's atm and...
TA: ii am wiitne22iing the mo2t *pornographiic* cuddle2hoo2h *ever* we're talkiiing mutual no2e iin neck and everythiing
TA: almo2t enough two get me all flu2tered, iiyaan
AC: :33 < *ac's gaze sharpens and she stalks through the bushes, nostrils flaring to catch the scent of her prey*
AC: :33 < *in her clawed paw is held THE PALE CRAYON!!*
CC: I t)(oug)(t for )(umans it was more of a genetic close matc)( t)(ing. Maybe as an adaptation to kelp t)(e spread of t)(eir genome, it wouldn't )(elp if t)(ey krilled eac)( otter rig)(t and left, rig)(t?
AC: :33 < aw, you're taking all the fun out of it. :(( *ac regretfully lowers her crayon hand*
TA: huh, dv'2 purriing
AC: :33 < :DD !!!!
TA: 2omeone 2ave me.
CG: CHERUBFUCK ON A CELESTIAL POGO STICK. WILL YOU FUCKING LAY OFF THE SALACIOUS LIVEBLOGGING ALREADY.
CG: WE GET IT, THEY'RE ABOUT TO SWOON INTO THE CLOSEST PILE AND TENDERLY TAKE OFF EACH OTHER'S SHADES. NOW STOP VIOLATING THEIR PRIVACY AND THE SANCTITY OF OUR THINKPANS BEFORE I VOMIT MINE OUT.
CC: )(a)(a)(a)(a 3XD T)(eir s)(ades, you say?
AC: :33 < *cc is right ac can't help but notice that karkitty has VISUALIZED it*
TA: you got a fanta2y you wanted to talk to u2 about, kk ?
TA: iif 2o plea2e don't.
CG: I HATE ALL OF YOU IN AN ENTIRELY PAIL-FREE WAY.
AC: :33 < okay that's furry depurrved.
CC: I conc)(curr. 38O
TA: le ga2p
CG: NOT THAT W OH YOU KNOW WHAT, JUST SHUT UP. BREAK THEM UP, ASK THEM FOR A STATUS REPORT, GET THEM THE FUCK ONLINE. CHOP CHOP.
TA: aww you'd want me two iinterrupt 2uch a 2weet dii2play, you heartle22 mon2ter
TA: dr ju2t vowed two hunt down and murder the creeper that dared two profane dv'2 iinnocent tu2h, subvocal 2narl and all
AC: :33 < X333333333
CG: WAIT, SOMEONE DID *WHAT* TO DAVE.
TA: ...
TA: none of your bu2iine22 and iit'2 handled.
TA: dv'2 ru2t ii2 all.
TA: and liive2 iin my town
TA: creeper2 happen.
AC: :33 < DD:
CC: You mean t)(at t)(ere really ARE people like t)(at out t)(ere??? I thoug)(t it was anc)(omovie t)(ing!!
TA: ...
CG: ...
TA: ff honey you liive iin the miiddle of bumfuck nowhere, where would you even *meet* creep2
CG: LET US NOT MENTION THE GILLS EITHER, EVEN IF YOU WENT AROUND HEMOANONYMOUS. WHO THE FUCK WOULD GROPE A SEA TROLL.
CG: APART FROM SOMEONE WHOSE ONLY POSSIBLE PATH TO FAME WOULD BE TO GET THEIR UGLY MUG ON BEST 50 MESSY DEATHS OF THE SWEEP.
AC: :33 < :((
CG: IT'S NOT THAT BAD, I'M SURE HE'S FINE. DON'T YOU DARE KEEP UP THE SAD MEOWBEAST EYES.
TA: yeah ii agree. ju2t
TA: could you guy2 pretend ii diidn't tell you, ii'm pretty 2ure he won't liike knowiing we go22iipped about iit.
CC: Alrig)(t, I promise.
AC: :33 < purromise too. i won't tell. cross my heart and hope to die. *the huntress says furry seriously*
TA: gonna era2e that part of the log2, brb
CG: WELL. WHO'S STILL MISSING? APART FROM JOHN DOUCHEWAGON EGBERT. ANYONE SEEN KANAYA?
CC: Yea)(, s)(e was online six )(ours ago. Pretty swamped in undead, but it's not like s)(e wouldn't go straig)(t back to rainbow drinkerhood if s)(e died again.
CG: MAYBE SHE WOULDN'T, ACTUALLY. WHAT IF IT WAS A FUNCTION OF THE GAME, LIKE SYLLADEXES AND STRIFE SPECIBI, AND NOW THE GAME IS OVER IT'LL STOP WORKING?
AC: :33 < im furry sure rainbow drinkers have nothing to do with games and programs and technology stuff, and efurrything to do with very fleshy gut and nerves parasites :XX
CG: ... OH URGH.
CG: YOU SURE?
AC: :33 < there's still zombies prowling outside and it's kind of the same thing so...
-- gardenGnostic [GG] joined the memo! --
CG: OKAY, GOOD, KANAYA BOUGHT HERSELF YET ANOTHER EXTRA LIFE SOMEHOW. SOME PEOPLE HOARD ALL THE LUCK, I SWEAR.
GG: hi guys!!!! any news? :D
CG: HARLEY. STILL ALIVE SINCE YESTERDAY, I SEE.
AC: :33 < gg !! *the huntress yowls in gr33ting* it's nice to s33 you!
GG: *the she-wolf trots up to the cat and licks her nose in greeting* :)
AC: :33 < h33 h33
CG: OH PLEASE, SPARE ME THE SACCHARINE PREDATORBEASTS. I HAVE A PRETEND-ROLLED UP NEWSPAPER AND A SPRAY WATER BOTTLE AND I WILL PRETEND-USE THEM.
CG: ... WHAT HAVE I BEEN REDUCED TO.
GG: dont make me pee on your leg, mister grumpypants
GG: hi feferi, hi sollux! :D so did anyone else get online while i was sleeping???
TA: rx fiinally found a 2iignal, we're triiangulatiing two get her locatiion, and ii'm 2tandiing liiterally fiive 2tep2 away from dr and dv atm
GG: OH MY GOD DAVE IS HERE???
GG: WHY IS HE NOT ONLINE?!! GET HIM THE FUCK ONLINE TWO MINUTES AGO, CAPTOR!!!!
TA: we're kiinda bu2y iirl riight now
GG: oh gee let me rephrase!!!!
GG: GET HIM THE FUCK ONLINE *NOW* BEFORE I TELEPORT TO WHERE YOU GUYS ARE AND STRANGLE HIM.
GG: i will totally strangle you next, dont try me!!!
CG: ...
CC: )(a)(a)(a)(a 3XD
TA: ... ye2 ma'am.
TA: p2 don't try two teleport two where we are that ii2 a really biig number of miile2 and al2o you wiill diie, ii'm 2eriiou2.
TA: no one know2 psychiic burnout liike ii do and you would explode your thiinkpan guaranteed
GG: ill give it another minute. >:/
CC: S)(oos)(, s)(oos)(, )(e's safe now. Just a little more patience, Jade!
GG: ... mnrgh. okay fine.
AC: :33 < :333333333
GG: if the huntress goes to update her wall the wolfess will hunt her down to bite her *right on the rump*!
AC: :33 < :OO
GG: crap! that wasnt blackflirting. no making shocked faces!! it was not blackflirting at ALL.
-- turntechGodhead [TG] joined the memo! --
-- timaeusTestified [TT] joined the memo! --
TG: sure it wasnt harley
TG: suuuuuuuuure it wasnt
GG: Dave!!! :DDDDDDDDDD youre okay!!!!
TG: all that belief infusing my body im about to barf communion wine no wait nvm thats from the hookers from last nights party
GG: and dirk, hi dirk!!!!
TT: Nice to see how I rate. Hey, Jade.
GG: :pppp
GG: now go back out of the room and when you come back in pretend you did not read that. :X
-----
GG: goddamnit landed on a rock in the middle of the sea AGAIN!!!
GG: i dont get it!!! i found you and john and terezi super easy, what gives!
AC: :33 < *ac wonders as well as this is purretty furrisome*
AC: :33 < *sadly she isnt even a lil bit psychic and has no clue to offur* :((
GG: bluh. im going back to my last landing, brb.
-- gardenGnostic [GG] stopped trolling arsenicCatnip [AC] --
-- gardenGnostic [GG] started trolling arsenicCatnip [AC] --
GG: and NOW im landing perfectly. >:/
AC: :33 < hmmm.
AC: :33 < *ac just thought of something*
AC: :33 < to pounce you have to know where you want to land, sure, but you have to know your own footing too! maybe you just dont know your area well enough.
GG: huh. so how do you explain how i found everyone else on the first try?
GG: your theory sounds kinda dubious. >:/
AC: :33 < i dont know! >:(( im just trying to help. dont snap at me!
AC: :33 < im worried for roxy too okay? >://
--
Battlefield Terra
--
They only saw the tail end of it, a wild lunging slash and blood smearing from three scratches down Mr. Strider's forearm.
Dave went tense; John's hand clenched on his shoulder and he flipped on his side under him to see the scene better. Karkat had gone in a low, tense crouch and while John couldn't see his face it was obvious he was trying to circle so he'd stop being between John and Dave and Mr. Strider. The scratches weren't bleeding much anymore, but they went from wrist almost to elbow, cutting through a burn scar and narrowly missing that weird teeth-shaped scar on the inside of the man's forearm where it looked like he'd been trying to choke someone out and they'd bitten him really fucking hard.
Strider started smiling, a barely-there slash of thin lips.
John nudged Dave to get him off him and sat up to watch, all pretenses of sparring gone as the other pair circled slowly around the room.
Another pass had Strider avoiding two wild slashes of claws and hooking Karkat's nearest horn with two fingers to throw him to the ground; Karkat landed a bit hard but rolled off his back in a scrambling hurry, though Strider wasn't pushing the attack to axe-kick him in the stomach while he was down like he would have with Roxy.
(Mostly because Roxy, he would have missed. John only deserved that kind of follow-up when he was being a dumbass, and even then the man usually pulled his kicks.)
"Hey, we don't know how easily they break off," John threw anyway, maybe a bit worried. Karkat's tiny gold-rust horns weren't much of a lever, but out of all the masses there was only a single troll with a broken horn in Karkat's memories, so either they were really hard to snap, or really easy and therefore not to be targeted.)
"Actually, we do," Strider commented lazily, eyes not leaving Karkat's face for a second. (Karkat kept retreating around the room and he didn't look like he was having fun at all.) "Labs did a few stress tests. Structural integrity's about the same as thigh bone. Solid shit."
... They'd done stress tests on Karkat's horns. Neither of them was splintered (there was just that nail-sized bit shaved off the surface) so they had to have stopped when it started deforming under pressure.
John thought of sitting there as someone tested how far they could bend his fingers before they started threatening to come out of their sockets, and felt sick.
They'd slowly moved closer to Dave and John as they feinted and tried to grab each other, and John was pretty sure they should move, because Strider would totally kick them in passing for taking an unplanned sparring break if he got that close, but before John could move Karkat was breaking the standoff and running full tilt for him.
"Whoa, hey--" John leaned back, started to dodge -- those flying knees looked especially face-unfriendly -- but by then Karkat was already jumping over his leg.
Strider followed, slapping John's head in passing. Ow. John turned just in time to see Karkat vault over the arms of one of the running machine and slip underneath the next.
All the weight lifting machines and the gymnastic equipment had been parked to the side to free the middle of the room. It made a tangle of padded benches and bars and balance beams and vaulting horses. Strider came to a stop before it and then set his hands on his hips; Karkat had already negotiated his way through to the higher of the uneven bars, and the way he climbed -- the sense of balance he had, huh, by the time Mr. Strider caught up he'd already be exiting the mess by just about any other end, parkour style.
He was really not having fun. Crap. John climbed to his feet and joined Mr. Strider, winced at him. "I... don't think he gets the point of sparring. Like. Uh."
Strider sighed. "No fucking kidding." He stuck his hands in his pockets, tilted his head, it was like he was trying to telegraph harmless but in John's opinion he mostly managed 'still deciding whether to bother hunting you down.'
--
Midnight on the Demon Patrol chapter 16 (porn)
--
Seven AM. Dave is in the shower. At eight he's got to be at the station.
Today's going to be exciting, but he spent the last fifteen minutes thinking of Aradia and it almost put him back to sleep. Eyes closed, he stands under the hot spray.
God, does he like having his very own hot water tank. He should probably leave some for Karkat, though. Reluctantly, he straightens up, reaches for the soap.
"Hey," Karkat calls from outside the bathroom. Dave arches an eyebrow.
"Yeah?"
"That demon's pretty dangerous, right."
Dave snorts. They've managed to bring back one single victim to sanity so far, and he's fragile and cries at the drop of a hat. Another two have managed to commit suicide. Sounds fucking horrifying. "No kidding."
Karkat says something, which Dave doesn't hear; he grunts a question. Karkat cracks the door open. "I said, are you prepared, fuckface."
It's cute that Karkat is getting involved. Uh, not cute, it's... heartwarming? Encouraging? He's taking their duty seriously and being proactive about it, it's pretty cool. "Yeah, yeah. Gun's ready, Aradia's loaded." (She snorts in his head.) "Just gotta take a baseball bat to that nice mantel clock I've got for Damara, but that won't take long."
"Okay, I should probably do that too," Karkat says casually, and walks in.
Dave fumbles the soap, which squirts from his hands and flies gracefully over the cabin's glass wall. Karkat blinks dubiously down at where it glided to a stop between his hands.
And then he closes the bathroom door behind him.
"Uh. Karkat."
Karkat picks up the soap with one hand, sits up on his haunches, pulls the shower door open with his free hand. "Hm?"
He hands Dave the soap. Dave takes it without thought. Then he puts a hand on Dave's belly and pins him to the really fucking cold tiles.
"Holy shit, what the hell!" Dave glares down at his demon, spine arched off the wall as much as he can. His bangs slop in his face; he has to close an eye.
Pretty hard to stay angry when he has Karkat at crotch height and they're both naked. Not that Karkat is ever anything but, but... well. There's something about being in the shower that makes him nakeder somehow.
He can almost hear his sister arching her eyebrow at him about his language butchering. Shut up, Mind Rose, nakeder is so a word.
Pffhehehe.
Also shut up, Mind Latula, plz.
"Not that I want you to leave or anything but you probably shouldn't wear your badge under the shower, bud. The leather will--"
"Not taking it off," Karkat growls back, baring his teeth at him. "Anyway, if it's ruined then good, you can get me a red one instead. One Equius hasn't slobbered over, preferably. Now get down here, I'm not doing this standing up."
Karkat is the romantiquest.
Also Dave really, really likes that he doesn't want to take it off. Like... can I kiss you on the face everywhere levels of like. He gives in; lets himself slide down the cold as hell tiles so he's sitting on his haunches, lower back pressed to the wall, and cups Karkat's face with both hands. Derailed, his demon frowns, makes a puzzled little pouty moue.
Okay so Dave is totally kissing him. He leans in and presses their mouths together, a bit insistent, holds it a second and then two. No tongue, though. He -- he really wishes Karkat got what's good about French kissing.
(He wishes Karkat got what it tends to imply.) He breaks away from his mouth to kiss the tip of his nose.
"I thought you thought bathroom sex was too stupid to contemplate."
Karkat growls lightly and places his hands on Dave's thighs to balance himself, leans in until Dave is sitting straight with his head pressed to the tiles and Karkat is still right in his face, seesaw teeth bared at the edge. "That's why I want you sitting, douchenozzle, because your brain is somehow just smart enough to know it's stupid and yet stupid enough to want it anyway." A soft, soft snarl. "Tell me I'm wrong."
Karkat is really not wrong. Water is spattering his shell heartily, making it all sleek and bright, darkening the velvet of his face in long, slowly diffusing trails, droplets are caught in his hair -- he's getting all wet and Dave wants to explore how that feels all over.
He smoothes his hands up Karkat's arms; skin glides and catches in turn on their sculpted, hard planes. Karkat nuzzles his way down Dave's jaw, nips here and there, buries his face in Dave's neck and he can still feel the points of his teeth. It feels so nice.
Dave makes a note to apologize to Rose for all the time he mocked her vampire phase mercilessly, because wow would it be sexy to have Karkat's teeth in him right now... Only if they left tiny anchoring puncture wounds behind, mind; he's not really in the right frame of mind to enjoy having a mouthful of flesh chewed right through his jugular.
Karkat pushes his way between Dave's knees, flanks rubbing against the inside of Dave's thighs, and ngh. It's a hideous travesty that Karkat has nothing to fuck him with, because he would be riding that like a leather-faced cowboy at his fiftieth rodeo.
Hot as it is, his thighs are starting to shake, strained, his ankle hurts; he shuffles his weight awkwardly on one foot, so he can unfold a leg, and then he drops the rest of the way to the shower floor. He stretches his legs as much as he can in the stall -- crap, kicked the door open, water will be getting out on the mat. Oh, what the hell, who cares, it'll dry.
"Nice view," he manages, as Karkat frowns at him like a wedding caterer who just had bridezilla decide to change the dinner menu on her again.
... uh. Okay, that is sure a thing he just thought. Funny how Dave's comparisons get sillier and more random the more blood travels to his downstairs head. Does his dick have matrimony in mind now? What the heck, lil' dude.
And now he has a demon shoving his knees together and straddling his lap. The head of his dick bumps against Karkat's water-streaked belly. Mmh. "Even nicer view. I approve. Like. A lot."
"One day I'll find a way to shut you up during this," Karkat grouses as he leans in to nip his earlobe. Fff yes.
"Dude, gags are a bit kinkier than I expected you to suggessssh okay that was nice."
Kakat just went and ground his -- his fuzz-covered pelvic plate riiight up his cock and it was almost too hard, but also a pretty awesome way to get Dave's entire attention. He grips Karkat's hips, guides him for a second pass; they've done this often enough that Karkat has learned to roll his hips into it and fuck if it isn't sexy as hell.
Karkat shuffles up on his knees a bit, so that the head of Dave's dick is trapped between the slight jut of his pelvis and Dave's belly. "Move down -- need more space for my knees--"
Dave does, groaning a bit as he oozes down the wall and shuffles his butt farther along. His neck will ache some, being forced to bow, but he can deal with it if it means Karkat can ride properly. His dick pops free and swings between Karkat's thighs, glances off a soft inner thigh, almost brushes against that place in the middle.
Dave stares, transfixed.
Good. Now grab his hips like a rodeo calf. Spit him on your pole of meat. Mighty fucker.
"Oh my fucking god Damara what the fuck!"
He lets go of Karkat in a great disgusted hurry, presses both hands on his eyes like that will help at all with the images she's putting in his head.
Put your pole of lust in his moist crevice. And shake your hips hard. He will moan. Raging tornado fuck.
Dave oozes farther down the wall, groaning. "No, shut up, you're killing it--"
--
Midnight snippet
--
Everyone thinks Dave is the follower, that where she goes he will go.
It could be true, but she can learn wherever she wants, and he won't be happy anywhere else, Knight to his fingertips. Besides, she knows him, she knows this -- for how much he professes not to care that he never knew their parents, that Bro makes a fine substitute, they died cops and he needs to follow.
--
Jade/Dave/Karkat/John/Terezi fluff-porn
--
Something is bumping searchingly against her belly; she's pretty sure it's Terezi's bulge. Dave is way past half-hard against her butt. It's already cool, but when she looks to the side, John and Karkat are watching, spooning. John is staring dumbly, face a bit red like he's not sure whether to enjoy it or look away (he is so not looking away,) but Karkat is all calm and interested, and it's such a nice look on him.
She wants to smush his cheeks and kiss his nose. Maybe later. She shifts her weight up and guides Dave's dick between her thighs, so it rubs over her crack and her pussy lips, pulls Terezi closer. The cool point of her bulge trails down Jade's belly, tangles briefly with her pubes. Terezi's fingers follow it, combing and petting Jade's pubes, tugging on them a bit. It's funny because Karkat does the same thing -- not the tugging so much, but the petting.
Trolls don't really do body hair much, but Karkat has coin-sized pieces of baby shell on his shoulder blades. Jade's hands run down Terezi's back, to see if she does as well. Against her pussy lips Terezi's bulge coils with Dave's dick.
Dave groans, and immediately smothers it, burrows his face against Jade's shoulder, away from John and Dave. When Jade turns her head to look, he's blushing, eyes scrunched closed, and when Terezi wrings another groan out of him he reddens even worse.
"Aw, c'mon," he mutters, "don't make me -- not around my bro, shit's embarrassing."
Terezi laughs. Jade purses her lips so she doesn't laugh as well. "Okay! John, we need to blindfold you so you don't see Dave's orgasm face. Also plug your ears maybe."
"I haaate you," John mutters back, face darkening in turn. It is such a nice copper when he blushes, with his tan.
"With what?" Karkat asks. "Everything we have is coated in sopor. Even our hands. Ganderbulbs plus sopor is a bad plan."
"What do you suggest, mister Strawberry Delight?"
"He suggests no blindfolds, what the hell guys, I'll just close my eyes, I don't wanna see it either!"
"Fine," Dave grunts back.
"Fine!" John concludes. "... If you do it too."
She can see Dave is about to ask what exactly he's supposed to look at, but in the end he doesn't find the strength to not-mention the mysterious happenstances under sopor level in John's crotch area. "... Fine. Okay. Fine."
Jade laughs because they are ridiculous. Terezi agrees; even Karkat snickers quietly.
After that she gasps, because Terezi's bulge has found her vagina.
It's cool enough to the touch that she clenches without thought. Terezi trills like a rusty metal bird. Dave makes a weird choked up whimpering noise, and burrows in her neck again. Jade barely notices. Terezi's ridges go almost to the top of her bulge, where Karkat's only start halfway from the tip. The sensation is different enough that she needs a moment to process it.
"Oh, you're warm," Terezi purrs in Jade's neck, on the other side from Dave.
Jade shivers and rocks on Dave's lap, on his dick still angling up between her thighs. The tip of Terezi's bulge is still poking around, coiling and flicking inside her in ticklish loops. It's weird because as she opens her up the sopor flows in, too, thick and warm. "I'm -- ngh -- I'm sure Karkat's warmer."
Cackle, a little breathless. "No, Karkat is hot."
"Damn right he is," John and Dave chorus, deadpan and amused, and then Karkat goes "Damn right I am" and everyone pauses to giggle.
Well, Terezi's bulge doesn't pause much.
--
A couple of Daemon AU attempts
--
Demon patrol:
The first time Karkat touches Dave's daemon they're in a flooded basement running from flesh-eating vines. Dave is already breathless and stumbling, so the shock of it, the vertigo don't change much. Karkat has one of Dave's arms slung around his shoulders and Dave's soul held to his chest as he drags them to safety, cradled in a cage of murderous beast claws.
They're cornered and about to become meat soup and Dave still feels oddly safe.
He doesn't mention it afterwards. John hasn't seen and Karkat seems to think nothing of it -- made sense, anyway, to scoop up the stunned, hurt daemon if he was going to drag the man away. It would have been worse if he hadn't.
As they ride back to the police station Bowie preens his hair and huddles against his neck and shudders. She tells John's Aiolos it's just the magic drain.
Karkat is curled up in the foot well against Dave's legs, making very sure not to look like he's paying attention.
--
karkat gangbang:
Three of the aliens' soul-beasts are demon-feathered flight beasts, the smallest ones a metallic cerulean and a dull brown with long legs, small enough to fit in a hand, the biggest one a glossy black, bigger than its soulmate's head. The two smallest don't seem dangerous at all.
The fourth is some sort of dog-cat beast, a rich fire orange, on ridiculous stilt legs.
It spends its time crouched on top of Kulira, tongue lolling cheerfully, white fangs showing at the tips in nonchalant threat.
On the upside none of the aliens have touched her yet.
On the downside they won't let her neat Karkat; she could eat through his bonds and they apparently can tell.
Less than I was trying for, but how dare my brother get married there in the middle. >__> The lack of big chaptered multipart update is annoying ( a lot of this total is ficlets) but I am still quite satisfied at the total. Good job, self.
POSTED:
-30-th Century Night sequel - four weeks in, Dave POV (3 329 words)
-two 30-th Century Night daemon AU ficlets (1 421 words)
-Crash Standing Daemon AU ficlet (509 words)
-Three Battlefield Terra daemon AU ficlets (5 246 words)
-FF7 Daemon AU: Breon settles (833 words)
-Midnight on the Demon Patrol, Rose prequel, Scourge Summoner (961 words)
-A Troll Not Named Fuckass - DaveJade & Karkat, pet Karkat AU fluff (7959 words)
WORKS IN PROGRESS:
-Three complete pesterlogs for Covalent'verse (2 905 words) (not posting them outside tumblr yet cause i want to write a few more and post them all as a complete narrative.)
-Covalent'verse - chatlog snippets, some spoiler and some to be deleted (418 words)
-Battlefield Terra, main fic (1 119 words)
-Midnight on the Demon Patrol, chapter 16 (3 759 words) (a lot of it porny)
-Midnight on the Demon Patrol snippet that went nowhere (71 words)
-Jade/Dave/Karkat/John/Terezi fluff-porn (2 455 words)
-Attempt at a sequel to Gotta Go Fast Beat'er 2000!! (96 words) (orz)
-Attempt at a daemon AU to Midnight on the Demon Patrol (170 words)
-Attempt at a daemon AU to the karkat gangbang fic (116 words)
--
Covalent 'verse
--
-- twinArmageddons [TA] is no longer idle! --
TA: gue22 what ii found.
AC: :33 < boy tg-or-tt's place? *ac guesses*
CG: IT HAD BETTER BE A DOUCHE IN SHADES.
TA: iit'2 ...
TA: iiiiiit'2 ...
TA: two douche2 iin 2hade2.
AC: :33 < lucky!
CG: YOU INCLUDED OR...?
TA: har har har, kk.
TA: ran iintwo dv on the 2treet, he'd 2een dr'2 hiive two. met a few block2 off iit.
CC: 38D Conc)(gratulations!
AC: :33 < mew? *the kitty says confused* conscratchulations about what? *she asks scratching her head*
TA: yeah thank2 ff, all ii wanted for twelfth periigee'2 eve.
TA: the good new2 ii2 they're *defiiniitely* each other'2 crew.
TA: the bad new2 ii2 2o am ii.
CG: HOW TERRIBLE. I FULLY SYMPATHIZE WITH THE IMMENSE TRAUMATISM OF HAVING AN OBNOXIOUS NOOK PIMPLE IN STUPID EYEWEAR AND A REGRETTABLY BIASED APPRECIATION OF HIS OWN VOICE AS A HATEFRIEND.
CG: HOW WELL DO I KNOW THIS TERRIBLE PAIN.
TA: bluh bluh 2hut up. anyway we're all three 2afely at dr's atm and...
TA: ii am wiitne22iing the mo2t *pornographiic* cuddle2hoo2h *ever* we're talkiiing mutual no2e iin neck and everythiing
TA: almo2t enough two get me all flu2tered, iiyaan
AC: :33 < *ac's gaze sharpens and she stalks through the bushes, nostrils flaring to catch the scent of her prey*
AC: :33 < *in her clawed paw is held THE PALE CRAYON!!*
CC: I t)(oug)(t for )(umans it was more of a genetic close matc)( t)(ing. Maybe as an adaptation to kelp t)(e spread of t)(eir genome, it wouldn't )(elp if t)(ey krilled eac)( otter rig)(t and left, rig)(t?
AC: :33 < aw, you're taking all the fun out of it. :(( *ac regretfully lowers her crayon hand*
TA: huh, dv'2 purriing
AC: :33 < :DD !!!!
TA: 2omeone 2ave me.
CG: CHERUBFUCK ON A CELESTIAL POGO STICK. WILL YOU FUCKING LAY OFF THE SALACIOUS LIVEBLOGGING ALREADY.
CG: WE GET IT, THEY'RE ABOUT TO SWOON INTO THE CLOSEST PILE AND TENDERLY TAKE OFF EACH OTHER'S SHADES. NOW STOP VIOLATING THEIR PRIVACY AND THE SANCTITY OF OUR THINKPANS BEFORE I VOMIT MINE OUT.
CC: )(a)(a)(a)(a 3XD T)(eir s)(ades, you say?
AC: :33 < *cc is right ac can't help but notice that karkitty has VISUALIZED it*
TA: you got a fanta2y you wanted to talk to u2 about, kk ?
TA: iif 2o plea2e don't.
CG: I HATE ALL OF YOU IN AN ENTIRELY PAIL-FREE WAY.
AC: :33 < okay that's furry depurrved.
CC: I conc)(curr. 38O
TA: le ga2p
CG: NOT THAT W OH YOU KNOW WHAT, JUST SHUT UP. BREAK THEM UP, ASK THEM FOR A STATUS REPORT, GET THEM THE FUCK ONLINE. CHOP CHOP.
TA: aww you'd want me two iinterrupt 2uch a 2weet dii2play, you heartle22 mon2ter
TA: dr ju2t vowed two hunt down and murder the creeper that dared two profane dv'2 iinnocent tu2h, subvocal 2narl and all
AC: :33 < X333333333
CG: WAIT, SOMEONE DID *WHAT* TO DAVE.
TA: ...
TA: none of your bu2iine22 and iit'2 handled.
TA: dv'2 ru2t ii2 all.
TA: and liive2 iin my town
TA: creeper2 happen.
AC: :33 < DD:
CC: You mean t)(at t)(ere really ARE people like t)(at out t)(ere??? I thoug)(t it was anc)(omovie t)(ing!!
TA: ...
CG: ...
TA: ff honey you liive iin the miiddle of bumfuck nowhere, where would you even *meet* creep2
CG: LET US NOT MENTION THE GILLS EITHER, EVEN IF YOU WENT AROUND HEMOANONYMOUS. WHO THE FUCK WOULD GROPE A SEA TROLL.
CG: APART FROM SOMEONE WHOSE ONLY POSSIBLE PATH TO FAME WOULD BE TO GET THEIR UGLY MUG ON BEST 50 MESSY DEATHS OF THE SWEEP.
AC: :33 < :((
CG: IT'S NOT THAT BAD, I'M SURE HE'S FINE. DON'T YOU DARE KEEP UP THE SAD MEOWBEAST EYES.
TA: yeah ii agree. ju2t
TA: could you guy2 pretend ii diidn't tell you, ii'm pretty 2ure he won't liike knowiing we go22iipped about iit.
CC: Alrig)(t, I promise.
AC: :33 < purromise too. i won't tell. cross my heart and hope to die. *the huntress says furry seriously*
TA: gonna era2e that part of the log2, brb
CG: WELL. WHO'S STILL MISSING? APART FROM JOHN DOUCHEWAGON EGBERT. ANYONE SEEN KANAYA?
CC: Yea)(, s)(e was online six )(ours ago. Pretty swamped in undead, but it's not like s)(e wouldn't go straig)(t back to rainbow drinkerhood if s)(e died again.
CG: MAYBE SHE WOULDN'T, ACTUALLY. WHAT IF IT WAS A FUNCTION OF THE GAME, LIKE SYLLADEXES AND STRIFE SPECIBI, AND NOW THE GAME IS OVER IT'LL STOP WORKING?
AC: :33 < im furry sure rainbow drinkers have nothing to do with games and programs and technology stuff, and efurrything to do with very fleshy gut and nerves parasites :XX
CG: ... OH URGH.
CG: YOU SURE?
AC: :33 < there's still zombies prowling outside and it's kind of the same thing so...
-- gardenGnostic [GG] joined the memo! --
CG: OKAY, GOOD, KANAYA BOUGHT HERSELF YET ANOTHER EXTRA LIFE SOMEHOW. SOME PEOPLE HOARD ALL THE LUCK, I SWEAR.
GG: hi guys!!!! any news? :D
CG: HARLEY. STILL ALIVE SINCE YESTERDAY, I SEE.
AC: :33 < gg !! *the huntress yowls in gr33ting* it's nice to s33 you!
GG: *the she-wolf trots up to the cat and licks her nose in greeting* :)
AC: :33 < h33 h33
CG: OH PLEASE, SPARE ME THE SACCHARINE PREDATORBEASTS. I HAVE A PRETEND-ROLLED UP NEWSPAPER AND A SPRAY WATER BOTTLE AND I WILL PRETEND-USE THEM.
CG: ... WHAT HAVE I BEEN REDUCED TO.
GG: dont make me pee on your leg, mister grumpypants
GG: hi feferi, hi sollux! :D so did anyone else get online while i was sleeping???
TA: rx fiinally found a 2iignal, we're triiangulatiing two get her locatiion, and ii'm 2tandiing liiterally fiive 2tep2 away from dr and dv atm
GG: OH MY GOD DAVE IS HERE???
GG: WHY IS HE NOT ONLINE?!! GET HIM THE FUCK ONLINE TWO MINUTES AGO, CAPTOR!!!!
TA: we're kiinda bu2y iirl riight now
GG: oh gee let me rephrase!!!!
GG: GET HIM THE FUCK ONLINE *NOW* BEFORE I TELEPORT TO WHERE YOU GUYS ARE AND STRANGLE HIM.
GG: i will totally strangle you next, dont try me!!!
CG: ...
CC: )(a)(a)(a)(a 3XD
TA: ... ye2 ma'am.
TA: p2 don't try two teleport two where we are that ii2 a really biig number of miile2 and al2o you wiill diie, ii'm 2eriiou2.
TA: no one know2 psychiic burnout liike ii do and you would explode your thiinkpan guaranteed
GG: ill give it another minute. >:/
CC: S)(oos)(, s)(oos)(, )(e's safe now. Just a little more patience, Jade!
GG: ... mnrgh. okay fine.
AC: :33 < :333333333
GG: if the huntress goes to update her wall the wolfess will hunt her down to bite her *right on the rump*!
AC: :33 < :OO
GG: crap! that wasnt blackflirting. no making shocked faces!! it was not blackflirting at ALL.
-- turntechGodhead [TG] joined the memo! --
-- timaeusTestified [TT] joined the memo! --
TG: sure it wasnt harley
TG: suuuuuuuuure it wasnt
GG: Dave!!! :DDDDDDDDDD youre okay!!!!
TG: all that belief infusing my body im about to barf communion wine no wait nvm thats from the hookers from last nights party
GG: and dirk, hi dirk!!!!
TT: Nice to see how I rate. Hey, Jade.
GG: :pppp
GG: now go back out of the room and when you come back in pretend you did not read that. :X
-----
GG: goddamnit landed on a rock in the middle of the sea AGAIN!!!
GG: i dont get it!!! i found you and john and terezi super easy, what gives!
AC: :33 < *ac wonders as well as this is purretty furrisome*
AC: :33 < *sadly she isnt even a lil bit psychic and has no clue to offur* :((
GG: bluh. im going back to my last landing, brb.
-- gardenGnostic [GG] stopped trolling arsenicCatnip [AC] --
-- gardenGnostic [GG] started trolling arsenicCatnip [AC] --
GG: and NOW im landing perfectly. >:/
AC: :33 < hmmm.
AC: :33 < *ac just thought of something*
AC: :33 < to pounce you have to know where you want to land, sure, but you have to know your own footing too! maybe you just dont know your area well enough.
GG: huh. so how do you explain how i found everyone else on the first try?
GG: your theory sounds kinda dubious. >:/
AC: :33 < i dont know! >:(( im just trying to help. dont snap at me!
AC: :33 < im worried for roxy too okay? >://
--
Battlefield Terra
--
They only saw the tail end of it, a wild lunging slash and blood smearing from three scratches down Mr. Strider's forearm.
Dave went tense; John's hand clenched on his shoulder and he flipped on his side under him to see the scene better. Karkat had gone in a low, tense crouch and while John couldn't see his face it was obvious he was trying to circle so he'd stop being between John and Dave and Mr. Strider. The scratches weren't bleeding much anymore, but they went from wrist almost to elbow, cutting through a burn scar and narrowly missing that weird teeth-shaped scar on the inside of the man's forearm where it looked like he'd been trying to choke someone out and they'd bitten him really fucking hard.
Strider started smiling, a barely-there slash of thin lips.
John nudged Dave to get him off him and sat up to watch, all pretenses of sparring gone as the other pair circled slowly around the room.
Another pass had Strider avoiding two wild slashes of claws and hooking Karkat's nearest horn with two fingers to throw him to the ground; Karkat landed a bit hard but rolled off his back in a scrambling hurry, though Strider wasn't pushing the attack to axe-kick him in the stomach while he was down like he would have with Roxy.
(Mostly because Roxy, he would have missed. John only deserved that kind of follow-up when he was being a dumbass, and even then the man usually pulled his kicks.)
"Hey, we don't know how easily they break off," John threw anyway, maybe a bit worried. Karkat's tiny gold-rust horns weren't much of a lever, but out of all the masses there was only a single troll with a broken horn in Karkat's memories, so either they were really hard to snap, or really easy and therefore not to be targeted.)
"Actually, we do," Strider commented lazily, eyes not leaving Karkat's face for a second. (Karkat kept retreating around the room and he didn't look like he was having fun at all.) "Labs did a few stress tests. Structural integrity's about the same as thigh bone. Solid shit."
... They'd done stress tests on Karkat's horns. Neither of them was splintered (there was just that nail-sized bit shaved off the surface) so they had to have stopped when it started deforming under pressure.
John thought of sitting there as someone tested how far they could bend his fingers before they started threatening to come out of their sockets, and felt sick.
They'd slowly moved closer to Dave and John as they feinted and tried to grab each other, and John was pretty sure they should move, because Strider would totally kick them in passing for taking an unplanned sparring break if he got that close, but before John could move Karkat was breaking the standoff and running full tilt for him.
"Whoa, hey--" John leaned back, started to dodge -- those flying knees looked especially face-unfriendly -- but by then Karkat was already jumping over his leg.
Strider followed, slapping John's head in passing. Ow. John turned just in time to see Karkat vault over the arms of one of the running machine and slip underneath the next.
All the weight lifting machines and the gymnastic equipment had been parked to the side to free the middle of the room. It made a tangle of padded benches and bars and balance beams and vaulting horses. Strider came to a stop before it and then set his hands on his hips; Karkat had already negotiated his way through to the higher of the uneven bars, and the way he climbed -- the sense of balance he had, huh, by the time Mr. Strider caught up he'd already be exiting the mess by just about any other end, parkour style.
He was really not having fun. Crap. John climbed to his feet and joined Mr. Strider, winced at him. "I... don't think he gets the point of sparring. Like. Uh."
Strider sighed. "No fucking kidding." He stuck his hands in his pockets, tilted his head, it was like he was trying to telegraph harmless but in John's opinion he mostly managed 'still deciding whether to bother hunting you down.'
--
Midnight on the Demon Patrol chapter 16 (porn)
--
Seven AM. Dave is in the shower. At eight he's got to be at the station.
Today's going to be exciting, but he spent the last fifteen minutes thinking of Aradia and it almost put him back to sleep. Eyes closed, he stands under the hot spray.
God, does he like having his very own hot water tank. He should probably leave some for Karkat, though. Reluctantly, he straightens up, reaches for the soap.
"Hey," Karkat calls from outside the bathroom. Dave arches an eyebrow.
"Yeah?"
"That demon's pretty dangerous, right."
Dave snorts. They've managed to bring back one single victim to sanity so far, and he's fragile and cries at the drop of a hat. Another two have managed to commit suicide. Sounds fucking horrifying. "No kidding."
Karkat says something, which Dave doesn't hear; he grunts a question. Karkat cracks the door open. "I said, are you prepared, fuckface."
It's cute that Karkat is getting involved. Uh, not cute, it's... heartwarming? Encouraging? He's taking their duty seriously and being proactive about it, it's pretty cool. "Yeah, yeah. Gun's ready, Aradia's loaded." (She snorts in his head.) "Just gotta take a baseball bat to that nice mantel clock I've got for Damara, but that won't take long."
"Okay, I should probably do that too," Karkat says casually, and walks in.
Dave fumbles the soap, which squirts from his hands and flies gracefully over the cabin's glass wall. Karkat blinks dubiously down at where it glided to a stop between his hands.
And then he closes the bathroom door behind him.
"Uh. Karkat."
Karkat picks up the soap with one hand, sits up on his haunches, pulls the shower door open with his free hand. "Hm?"
He hands Dave the soap. Dave takes it without thought. Then he puts a hand on Dave's belly and pins him to the really fucking cold tiles.
"Holy shit, what the hell!" Dave glares down at his demon, spine arched off the wall as much as he can. His bangs slop in his face; he has to close an eye.
Pretty hard to stay angry when he has Karkat at crotch height and they're both naked. Not that Karkat is ever anything but, but... well. There's something about being in the shower that makes him nakeder somehow.
He can almost hear his sister arching her eyebrow at him about his language butchering. Shut up, Mind Rose, nakeder is so a word.
Pffhehehe.
Also shut up, Mind Latula, plz.
"Not that I want you to leave or anything but you probably shouldn't wear your badge under the shower, bud. The leather will--"
"Not taking it off," Karkat growls back, baring his teeth at him. "Anyway, if it's ruined then good, you can get me a red one instead. One Equius hasn't slobbered over, preferably. Now get down here, I'm not doing this standing up."
Karkat is the romantiquest.
Also Dave really, really likes that he doesn't want to take it off. Like... can I kiss you on the face everywhere levels of like. He gives in; lets himself slide down the cold as hell tiles so he's sitting on his haunches, lower back pressed to the wall, and cups Karkat's face with both hands. Derailed, his demon frowns, makes a puzzled little pouty moue.
Okay so Dave is totally kissing him. He leans in and presses their mouths together, a bit insistent, holds it a second and then two. No tongue, though. He -- he really wishes Karkat got what's good about French kissing.
(He wishes Karkat got what it tends to imply.) He breaks away from his mouth to kiss the tip of his nose.
"I thought you thought bathroom sex was too stupid to contemplate."
Karkat growls lightly and places his hands on Dave's thighs to balance himself, leans in until Dave is sitting straight with his head pressed to the tiles and Karkat is still right in his face, seesaw teeth bared at the edge. "That's why I want you sitting, douchenozzle, because your brain is somehow just smart enough to know it's stupid and yet stupid enough to want it anyway." A soft, soft snarl. "Tell me I'm wrong."
Karkat is really not wrong. Water is spattering his shell heartily, making it all sleek and bright, darkening the velvet of his face in long, slowly diffusing trails, droplets are caught in his hair -- he's getting all wet and Dave wants to explore how that feels all over.
He smoothes his hands up Karkat's arms; skin glides and catches in turn on their sculpted, hard planes. Karkat nuzzles his way down Dave's jaw, nips here and there, buries his face in Dave's neck and he can still feel the points of his teeth. It feels so nice.
Dave makes a note to apologize to Rose for all the time he mocked her vampire phase mercilessly, because wow would it be sexy to have Karkat's teeth in him right now... Only if they left tiny anchoring puncture wounds behind, mind; he's not really in the right frame of mind to enjoy having a mouthful of flesh chewed right through his jugular.
Karkat pushes his way between Dave's knees, flanks rubbing against the inside of Dave's thighs, and ngh. It's a hideous travesty that Karkat has nothing to fuck him with, because he would be riding that like a leather-faced cowboy at his fiftieth rodeo.
Hot as it is, his thighs are starting to shake, strained, his ankle hurts; he shuffles his weight awkwardly on one foot, so he can unfold a leg, and then he drops the rest of the way to the shower floor. He stretches his legs as much as he can in the stall -- crap, kicked the door open, water will be getting out on the mat. Oh, what the hell, who cares, it'll dry.
"Nice view," he manages, as Karkat frowns at him like a wedding caterer who just had bridezilla decide to change the dinner menu on her again.
... uh. Okay, that is sure a thing he just thought. Funny how Dave's comparisons get sillier and more random the more blood travels to his downstairs head. Does his dick have matrimony in mind now? What the heck, lil' dude.
And now he has a demon shoving his knees together and straddling his lap. The head of his dick bumps against Karkat's water-streaked belly. Mmh. "Even nicer view. I approve. Like. A lot."
"One day I'll find a way to shut you up during this," Karkat grouses as he leans in to nip his earlobe. Fff yes.
"Dude, gags are a bit kinkier than I expected you to suggessssh okay that was nice."
Kakat just went and ground his -- his fuzz-covered pelvic plate riiight up his cock and it was almost too hard, but also a pretty awesome way to get Dave's entire attention. He grips Karkat's hips, guides him for a second pass; they've done this often enough that Karkat has learned to roll his hips into it and fuck if it isn't sexy as hell.
Karkat shuffles up on his knees a bit, so that the head of Dave's dick is trapped between the slight jut of his pelvis and Dave's belly. "Move down -- need more space for my knees--"
Dave does, groaning a bit as he oozes down the wall and shuffles his butt farther along. His neck will ache some, being forced to bow, but he can deal with it if it means Karkat can ride properly. His dick pops free and swings between Karkat's thighs, glances off a soft inner thigh, almost brushes against that place in the middle.
Dave stares, transfixed.
Good. Now grab his hips like a rodeo calf. Spit him on your pole of meat. Mighty fucker.
"Oh my fucking god Damara what the fuck!"
He lets go of Karkat in a great disgusted hurry, presses both hands on his eyes like that will help at all with the images she's putting in his head.
Put your pole of lust in his moist crevice. And shake your hips hard. He will moan. Raging tornado fuck.
Dave oozes farther down the wall, groaning. "No, shut up, you're killing it--"
--
Midnight snippet
--
Everyone thinks Dave is the follower, that where she goes he will go.
It could be true, but she can learn wherever she wants, and he won't be happy anywhere else, Knight to his fingertips. Besides, she knows him, she knows this -- for how much he professes not to care that he never knew their parents, that Bro makes a fine substitute, they died cops and he needs to follow.
--
Jade/Dave/Karkat/John/Terezi fluff-porn
--
Something is bumping searchingly against her belly; she's pretty sure it's Terezi's bulge. Dave is way past half-hard against her butt. It's already cool, but when she looks to the side, John and Karkat are watching, spooning. John is staring dumbly, face a bit red like he's not sure whether to enjoy it or look away (he is so not looking away,) but Karkat is all calm and interested, and it's such a nice look on him.
She wants to smush his cheeks and kiss his nose. Maybe later. She shifts her weight up and guides Dave's dick between her thighs, so it rubs over her crack and her pussy lips, pulls Terezi closer. The cool point of her bulge trails down Jade's belly, tangles briefly with her pubes. Terezi's fingers follow it, combing and petting Jade's pubes, tugging on them a bit. It's funny because Karkat does the same thing -- not the tugging so much, but the petting.
Trolls don't really do body hair much, but Karkat has coin-sized pieces of baby shell on his shoulder blades. Jade's hands run down Terezi's back, to see if she does as well. Against her pussy lips Terezi's bulge coils with Dave's dick.
Dave groans, and immediately smothers it, burrows his face against Jade's shoulder, away from John and Dave. When Jade turns her head to look, he's blushing, eyes scrunched closed, and when Terezi wrings another groan out of him he reddens even worse.
"Aw, c'mon," he mutters, "don't make me -- not around my bro, shit's embarrassing."
Terezi laughs. Jade purses her lips so she doesn't laugh as well. "Okay! John, we need to blindfold you so you don't see Dave's orgasm face. Also plug your ears maybe."
"I haaate you," John mutters back, face darkening in turn. It is such a nice copper when he blushes, with his tan.
"With what?" Karkat asks. "Everything we have is coated in sopor. Even our hands. Ganderbulbs plus sopor is a bad plan."
"What do you suggest, mister Strawberry Delight?"
"He suggests no blindfolds, what the hell guys, I'll just close my eyes, I don't wanna see it either!"
"Fine," Dave grunts back.
"Fine!" John concludes. "... If you do it too."
She can see Dave is about to ask what exactly he's supposed to look at, but in the end he doesn't find the strength to not-mention the mysterious happenstances under sopor level in John's crotch area. "... Fine. Okay. Fine."
Jade laughs because they are ridiculous. Terezi agrees; even Karkat snickers quietly.
After that she gasps, because Terezi's bulge has found her vagina.
It's cool enough to the touch that she clenches without thought. Terezi trills like a rusty metal bird. Dave makes a weird choked up whimpering noise, and burrows in her neck again. Jade barely notices. Terezi's ridges go almost to the top of her bulge, where Karkat's only start halfway from the tip. The sensation is different enough that she needs a moment to process it.
"Oh, you're warm," Terezi purrs in Jade's neck, on the other side from Dave.
Jade shivers and rocks on Dave's lap, on his dick still angling up between her thighs. The tip of Terezi's bulge is still poking around, coiling and flicking inside her in ticklish loops. It's weird because as she opens her up the sopor flows in, too, thick and warm. "I'm -- ngh -- I'm sure Karkat's warmer."
Cackle, a little breathless. "No, Karkat is hot."
"Damn right he is," John and Dave chorus, deadpan and amused, and then Karkat goes "Damn right I am" and everyone pauses to giggle.
Well, Terezi's bulge doesn't pause much.
--
A couple of Daemon AU attempts
--
Demon patrol:
The first time Karkat touches Dave's daemon they're in a flooded basement running from flesh-eating vines. Dave is already breathless and stumbling, so the shock of it, the vertigo don't change much. Karkat has one of Dave's arms slung around his shoulders and Dave's soul held to his chest as he drags them to safety, cradled in a cage of murderous beast claws.
They're cornered and about to become meat soup and Dave still feels oddly safe.
He doesn't mention it afterwards. John hasn't seen and Karkat seems to think nothing of it -- made sense, anyway, to scoop up the stunned, hurt daemon if he was going to drag the man away. It would have been worse if he hadn't.
As they ride back to the police station Bowie preens his hair and huddles against his neck and shudders. She tells John's Aiolos it's just the magic drain.
Karkat is curled up in the foot well against Dave's legs, making very sure not to look like he's paying attention.
--
karkat gangbang:
Three of the aliens' soul-beasts are demon-feathered flight beasts, the smallest ones a metallic cerulean and a dull brown with long legs, small enough to fit in a hand, the biggest one a glossy black, bigger than its soulmate's head. The two smallest don't seem dangerous at all.
The fourth is some sort of dog-cat beast, a rich fire orange, on ridiculous stilt legs.
It spends its time crouched on top of Kulira, tongue lolling cheerfully, white fangs showing at the tips in nonchalant threat.
On the upside none of the aliens have touched her yet.
On the downside they won't let her neat Karkat; she could eat through his bonds and they apparently can tell.
no subject
I'm also completely in love with the 30CN!snippet; oh Dave no, what are you doing, stop, I'm going to cry
and Karkat probably will, too, though his may be tears of mad frustration. *pats gently* If the porn mood ever strikes you, though, and you want to write their first attempt at anal... well, I will read that so fast that Dave assumes my eyes can flashstep. :D (Saw the discussion on Tumlr wherein you discussed 'anal sex: who goes first' for these two, and must add: write either of the firsts, I don't care, they would both be awesome.)Why do daemons make everything better. I have not even read HDM (though I did see the one movie), I just have an abiding weakness for soulbonded creatures, apparently.
"I'm -- ngh -- I'm sure Karkat's warmer."
Cackle, a little breathless. "No, Karkat is hot."
"Damn right he is," John and Dave chorus, deadpan and amused, and then Karkat goes "Damn right I am" and everyone pauses to giggle.
Heeheehee! Some scenes are just priceless, and this is one of them. I giggled out loud, too. :D
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haha, i may well write it some day, idk, we'll see.
Daemons are magic. aaaa soulpets aaaaaaaa.
♥
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no subject
WE GET IT, THEY'RE ABOUT TO SWOON INTO THE CLOSEST PILE AND TENDERLY TAKE OFF EACH OTHER'S SHADES.
a) LOL truth and b) LOL Karkat's fantasies.
I HAVE A PRETEND-ROLLED UP NEWSPAPER AND A SPRAY WATER BOTTLE AND I WILL PRETEND-USE THEM.
Oh god Karkat, stop being so goddamn adorable.
Also loooooved the JadeDaveKatJohnTer fic, so hot and adorable (and that combo made perfect sense to me because I'm pretty sure I ship all of those pairings). Lol @ John and Dave being like "Yeah we're in an orgy together, but we still don't want to see each other's come-faces because that would be weird." And eeeee Jade/Terezi! I have been longing for some decent porn of those two.
(Also, hi, I'm kind of a lurker and I've been a fan of your fics ever since I was in Naruto fandom and was really hardcore into the Team 7 OT3, so now that I've gotten hooked on Homestuck, I'm really excited to see you're writing in that fandom too! I need to comment on your fics more :F)
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Karkat is half grossed out and half uncomfortably titillated. ngh pale porn. nnnngh.
JadeDaveKatJohnTer => haha, i ship em all except johndave and johnterezi, in twosomes and in threesomes, it's innnnteresting to balance. XD
♥ don't worry about making yourself comment, just say things if you want to say them, it's all good u.u~ *not v. demanding*
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I imagine that fantasy also taps into Karkat's twincest/selfcest fetish, since by troll standards, Dave and Dirk are freakishly closely related.
I ship JohnTer for the lulz because the only times they've interacted were a) when she conned him into getting himself killed and b) when she threatened to slit his throat and listen to him bleed to death. Man, it's going to be so hilariously awkward now that they're finally meeting face-to-face.