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Monthly word count - June
... I feel like I wrote NOTHING this month. Apart from some drabbles, a lot of which petered out and are unpostable on account of going nowhere. Guiiiiiiiiiilt. I was SO SCATTERED it's crazy.
At least I did some plotting for Teamwork, but that doesn't help if I'm NOT WRITING IT AAAA.
Total: 10 245. 4 000 words less than last month, and then I have to throw away another 1 000 words on account of their suck. I am Disappoint.
Completed and posted:
Detective Conan: Swingersverse: that Saguru/Heiji hooking up at a police ball thing and Heiji's lunch next day w/girlfriend (3 038 words)
FF7: Daemon AU: Dragon Taxonomy (393 words)
FF7: Daemon AU: The Gold Saucer Date (3779 words)
GW/Temeraire: Dragons and their Boys: Sweet Music (398 words)
Teamwork: House Rule n°5 (184 words)
WIP:
-Teamwork: Uchiha Satsuki genderbending AU: 106 words. (will continue this one.)
-Restore: ficlet that died about traditions. I wanted to do Norse-based worldbuilding. 227 words. I might continue it, if I find an actual PLOT.
-Restore: Denzel dealing with outside views about his complicated family arrangement. (several fits and starts, nothing good. All together, 495 words) (unless a real bunny hits me over the head, will not rework.)
-Teamwork: attempts to make up more house rules. Failed to be concise & find the funny. All glued together, 218 words.
-Crossed Wires: 58 words. Fifty-eight. fifty-motherfucking-eight. And they all suck. I think I need to admit that this fic is pretty much long dead at this point.
-FF7: Steal: Welcome to Nibelheim ohohoho. 1 349 words.
Teasers:
Uchiha Satsuki genderbending AU
Satsuki doesn't need the pipeline seal half as much as Sakura does; Tsunade might even argue that she doesn't need it at all (if she knew about the seal in the first place). As an Uchiha, her chakra reserves are naturally much bigger. Sakura is civilian-born. Of course their health issues would be different.
Satsuki is less worried about chakra drain landing her in the hospital on enforced bed rest. She's more worried about overusing the sharingan to protect her child and herself from kidnapping, and giving herself chakra drain and landing herself in the hospital. Or worse, landing herself in a cell somewhere in Iwa.
--
ficlet that died about traditions
For all of Aeris' spirituality, Tifa was the most traditional of them both.
Mostly because Aeris had grown up in Midgar, where all traditions had long since been swallowed by Shinra, chewed into unrecognizable paste, and spat out as promotional offers in supermarkets. Buy A Toaster For Your Mother's day, Get Out Of That Forced Overtime Lawsuit By Getting Your Secretary Real Imported Roses day, Shinra Corp anniversary (a bank holiday), President's Birthday bonus, Shinra Appreciation parade-slash-troop review-slash-enemy intimidation, etcetera.
Tifa was the one who made Cloud drag home a log from Kalm so they could burn it at midwinter and festooned the bar in tiny straw goat dolls, the one who hid painted eggs for Marlene and Denzel to find in March, who put colored candles on the windows at the start of December. She didn't make it a big deal; it was all rather discreet, as if she were a little embarrassed of all the Nibelheim history she carried with her. Aeris was, she decided after long deliberations, jealous.
"Did you have any back home?" she asked Zack.
"Uh, sometimes we had feasts with special foods," he replied. "Gongaga's kind of small but in the next town over there were parades and dancy stuff, the Carnival..."
She only kicked him a little. Next she started to plot. First things first, corner Cloud to grill him properly.
--
Denzel dealing with outside views about his complicated family arrangement.
Start 1
Denzel had long since gotten used to living in a bar. Well, above a bar, though he did find the barroom itself a much better place to do homework than the backrooms; Marlene somehow was way more distracting than a roomful of people in various stages of inebriation.
But then he turned fifteen, and more importantly his classmates turned fifteen, and someone remembered, or mentioned, or whatever.
Start 2
"Cloud? Where's my baseball bat?"
"What do you want a baseball bat for?"
"To play baseball. Duh."
Cloud made a "...oh." face. Denzel narrowed his eyes.
"Okay, what'd you do with it?"
"Me, nothing. Ask Zack."
Denzel would have started swearing, but then Cloud would give him a long disappointed look, so he just went "Aw, man!" and grimaced. "What'd he do with it? Leave it in a monster's skull? Light a fire? Tell me it wasn't anything perverted."
((this one was purely because I was feeling random and wrote whatever. i don't even know where the hell i was going with it.))
Start 3
My Family
by Denzel Lockhart
"She must be kidding!"
Phi patted Denzel on the back consolingly. "Afraid not, buddy."
"She must be kidding. Where is she from? Are all teenagers there developmentally retarded or something?"
"Uh, Costa Del Sol, I think--" Denzel's glare had him realize it was a rhetorical question and he nodded quickly. "Yeah, I hear you, I mean, Meteor was like six years ago, isn't that like a massively loaded topic?"
Denzel twitched. Why, yes, it was a loaded topic, thanks for bringing it up, Phi. "I meant it's stuff you write about as a kid. We're fifteen!"
"I heard from Karl that Skyesong's big sister -- you know, Sunsomething, she works at the restaurant on Fourth and Main --"
Denzel sighed and thwapped his best friend on the shoulder. "Phi."
"-- ow, okay, Miss Lanesworth's teaching Literature now but she's trying to get her doctorate in, uh, anthrosociosomething. Dynamics. Anyway they were chatting about Midgar's Edge and the collapse of Shinra and lawlessness and how people related to each other differently now, I don't remember the details."
"Anthropology?" Denzel replied, eyes narrowing dangerously. "She came here to study us?"
Phi shrugged. "Not like she can use our essays in a paper."
"Not officially, no."
"Aw, Denzel, don't go getting all pissed off, maybe we're just her first class and she has no clue what to ask. Maybe she really does want to get to know us!"
Denzel blinked widened eyes at him. "You make it sound like I'm gonna do anything but exactly what she asked for!"
Phi winced.
--
house rules
3. a. Sasuke cooks.
3. a.1. Sasuke is not allowed to deprive me of ramen
3. a.2. Just because Naruto is not allowed to grope me when I cook doesn't mean you are, Sakura.
1.a there is to be no sex outside of a locked bedroom inside the house
1.a there is to be no sex outside of a locked room inside the house (But what about the rooms that don't have locks?) (EXACTLY.)
1.b. there is to be no sex IN THE KITCHEN
1.b. there is to be no sex in the kitchen without Sasuke NO, AT ALL. I COOK THERE.
--
Steal: Welcome to Nibelheim
The backseat was silent. When he checked in the mirror none of them had fallen back asleep, though; Kyril was looking out the window, Nadine playing with Gabe's tight curls, pulling until they were straight and releasing to watch them bounce back together. Gabe and Ludmila were frowning at the back of Zack's head, but that was pretty usual.
"Daddy?" Jake asked from the passenger's seat, legs bouncing almost absently.
"Yep?"
Zack negotiated a tight bend in the road, flicked Jake a quick encouraging grin in the mirror, though Jake rarely did need encouragement.
Was kinda weird he wasn't poking at the radio or the locked door, too. Maybe he was worrying about why they'd had to leave. They had to feel it wasn't normal, feel how tense he was underneath...
Jake hesitated. Jake never hesitated.
"...Are you broken?"
"Uh." Blink. Okay, when would he give up trying to predict his kids. "What? I'm broken?"
"He wasn't," contributed Nadine, glowering at him in the mirror.
"Who?"
"With the chocobo!"
"Sephiroth?" Alright, he was officially baffled. What on Earth--
Ludmila broke into huge, gasping tears, green eyes huge like he'd told them he was dying. Zack swerved to tuck the buggy up on a grassy bit of roadside, yanked his seatbelt off and leaned between the front seats. He pulled her in his arms and hugged her as well as he could with the seats in the middle and the buggy tilting to the side, but she only cried harder and started to whimper. Oh hell, oh hell, and now Gabe's eyes were going all wet as well.
"I'm not broken! I'm not broken at all. I'm fine, you're fine, everything's okay, I promise, come on, stop crying..."
If he crawled in the backseat to cuddle, likely they'd take it as proof, at first, and it would take at least a half-hour to get them all cried out until he could get to the bottom of this and reassure them. He didn't have that kind of time.
"Hey," he said, nice but firm, and prayed it wouldn't make her cry worse. "I'm absolutely not broken." Ludy gave him a doubtful look and sniffled, irises even more intensely green with how red the rest of her eyes were. He pointed his index up peremptorily. "Not!" Then he tapped her nose.
"Nnh!" she protested, batting at his hand. She sniffled; he produced a Kleenex.
"Here, blow. Good girl. You okay now?" He gentled his voice, caressed her hair. "Everything's fine. I've got to drive now, baby, okay?"
He sat back down in his seat. No crying started back up. None of her siblings took it up. Phew. Feeling more awesome than he'd ever felt dodging real, lead bullets on the field, he started driving again. He went fast, as if maybe he could leave the topic far behind. Hey, who knew, maybe they'd get distracted watching the scenery zip past.
Or maybe they'd start blowing chunks. Either or.
At least I did some plotting for Teamwork, but that doesn't help if I'm NOT WRITING IT AAAA.
Total: 10 245. 4 000 words less than last month, and then I have to throw away another 1 000 words on account of their suck. I am Disappoint.
Completed and posted:
Detective Conan: Swingersverse: that Saguru/Heiji hooking up at a police ball thing and Heiji's lunch next day w/girlfriend (3 038 words)
FF7: Daemon AU: Dragon Taxonomy (393 words)
FF7: Daemon AU: The Gold Saucer Date (3779 words)
GW/Temeraire: Dragons and their Boys: Sweet Music (398 words)
Teamwork: House Rule n°5 (184 words)
WIP:
-Teamwork: Uchiha Satsuki genderbending AU: 106 words. (will continue this one.)
-Restore: ficlet that died about traditions. I wanted to do Norse-based worldbuilding. 227 words. I might continue it, if I find an actual PLOT.
-Restore: Denzel dealing with outside views about his complicated family arrangement. (several fits and starts, nothing good. All together, 495 words) (unless a real bunny hits me over the head, will not rework.)
-Teamwork: attempts to make up more house rules. Failed to be concise & find the funny. All glued together, 218 words.
-Crossed Wires: 58 words. Fifty-eight. fifty-motherfucking-eight. And they all suck. I think I need to admit that this fic is pretty much long dead at this point.
-FF7: Steal: Welcome to Nibelheim ohohoho. 1 349 words.
Teasers:
Uchiha Satsuki genderbending AU
Satsuki doesn't need the pipeline seal half as much as Sakura does; Tsunade might even argue that she doesn't need it at all (if she knew about the seal in the first place). As an Uchiha, her chakra reserves are naturally much bigger. Sakura is civilian-born. Of course their health issues would be different.
Satsuki is less worried about chakra drain landing her in the hospital on enforced bed rest. She's more worried about overusing the sharingan to protect her child and herself from kidnapping, and giving herself chakra drain and landing herself in the hospital. Or worse, landing herself in a cell somewhere in Iwa.
--
ficlet that died about traditions
For all of Aeris' spirituality, Tifa was the most traditional of them both.
Mostly because Aeris had grown up in Midgar, where all traditions had long since been swallowed by Shinra, chewed into unrecognizable paste, and spat out as promotional offers in supermarkets. Buy A Toaster For Your Mother's day, Get Out Of That Forced Overtime Lawsuit By Getting Your Secretary Real Imported Roses day, Shinra Corp anniversary (a bank holiday), President's Birthday bonus, Shinra Appreciation parade-slash-troop review-slash-enemy intimidation, etcetera.
Tifa was the one who made Cloud drag home a log from Kalm so they could burn it at midwinter and festooned the bar in tiny straw goat dolls, the one who hid painted eggs for Marlene and Denzel to find in March, who put colored candles on the windows at the start of December. She didn't make it a big deal; it was all rather discreet, as if she were a little embarrassed of all the Nibelheim history she carried with her. Aeris was, she decided after long deliberations, jealous.
"Did you have any back home?" she asked Zack.
"Uh, sometimes we had feasts with special foods," he replied. "Gongaga's kind of small but in the next town over there were parades and dancy stuff, the Carnival..."
She only kicked him a little. Next she started to plot. First things first, corner Cloud to grill him properly.
--
Denzel dealing with outside views about his complicated family arrangement.
Start 1
Denzel had long since gotten used to living in a bar. Well, above a bar, though he did find the barroom itself a much better place to do homework than the backrooms; Marlene somehow was way more distracting than a roomful of people in various stages of inebriation.
But then he turned fifteen, and more importantly his classmates turned fifteen, and someone remembered, or mentioned, or whatever.
Start 2
"Cloud? Where's my baseball bat?"
"What do you want a baseball bat for?"
"To play baseball. Duh."
Cloud made a "...oh." face. Denzel narrowed his eyes.
"Okay, what'd you do with it?"
"Me, nothing. Ask Zack."
Denzel would have started swearing, but then Cloud would give him a long disappointed look, so he just went "Aw, man!" and grimaced. "What'd he do with it? Leave it in a monster's skull? Light a fire? Tell me it wasn't anything perverted."
((this one was purely because I was feeling random and wrote whatever. i don't even know where the hell i was going with it.))
Start 3
My Family
by Denzel Lockhart
"She must be kidding!"
Phi patted Denzel on the back consolingly. "Afraid not, buddy."
"She must be kidding. Where is she from? Are all teenagers there developmentally retarded or something?"
"Uh, Costa Del Sol, I think--" Denzel's glare had him realize it was a rhetorical question and he nodded quickly. "Yeah, I hear you, I mean, Meteor was like six years ago, isn't that like a massively loaded topic?"
Denzel twitched. Why, yes, it was a loaded topic, thanks for bringing it up, Phi. "I meant it's stuff you write about as a kid. We're fifteen!"
"I heard from Karl that Skyesong's big sister -- you know, Sunsomething, she works at the restaurant on Fourth and Main --"
Denzel sighed and thwapped his best friend on the shoulder. "Phi."
"-- ow, okay, Miss Lanesworth's teaching Literature now but she's trying to get her doctorate in, uh, anthrosociosomething. Dynamics. Anyway they were chatting about Midgar's Edge and the collapse of Shinra and lawlessness and how people related to each other differently now, I don't remember the details."
"Anthropology?" Denzel replied, eyes narrowing dangerously. "She came here to study us?"
Phi shrugged. "Not like she can use our essays in a paper."
"Not officially, no."
"Aw, Denzel, don't go getting all pissed off, maybe we're just her first class and she has no clue what to ask. Maybe she really does want to get to know us!"
Denzel blinked widened eyes at him. "You make it sound like I'm gonna do anything but exactly what she asked for!"
Phi winced.
--
house rules
3. a. Sasuke cooks.
3. a.1. Sasuke is not allowed to deprive me of ramen
3. a.2. Just because Naruto is not allowed to grope me when I cook doesn't mean you are, Sakura.
1.a there is to be no sex outside of a locked bedroom inside the house
1.a there is to be no sex outside of a locked room inside the house (But what about the rooms that don't have locks?) (EXACTLY.)
1.b. there is to be no sex IN THE KITCHEN
1.b. there is to be no sex in the kitchen without Sasuke NO, AT ALL. I COOK THERE.
--
Steal: Welcome to Nibelheim
The backseat was silent. When he checked in the mirror none of them had fallen back asleep, though; Kyril was looking out the window, Nadine playing with Gabe's tight curls, pulling until they were straight and releasing to watch them bounce back together. Gabe and Ludmila were frowning at the back of Zack's head, but that was pretty usual.
"Daddy?" Jake asked from the passenger's seat, legs bouncing almost absently.
"Yep?"
Zack negotiated a tight bend in the road, flicked Jake a quick encouraging grin in the mirror, though Jake rarely did need encouragement.
Was kinda weird he wasn't poking at the radio or the locked door, too. Maybe he was worrying about why they'd had to leave. They had to feel it wasn't normal, feel how tense he was underneath...
Jake hesitated. Jake never hesitated.
"...Are you broken?"
"Uh." Blink. Okay, when would he give up trying to predict his kids. "What? I'm broken?"
"He wasn't," contributed Nadine, glowering at him in the mirror.
"Who?"
"With the chocobo!"
"Sephiroth?" Alright, he was officially baffled. What on Earth--
Ludmila broke into huge, gasping tears, green eyes huge like he'd told them he was dying. Zack swerved to tuck the buggy up on a grassy bit of roadside, yanked his seatbelt off and leaned between the front seats. He pulled her in his arms and hugged her as well as he could with the seats in the middle and the buggy tilting to the side, but she only cried harder and started to whimper. Oh hell, oh hell, and now Gabe's eyes were going all wet as well.
"I'm not broken! I'm not broken at all. I'm fine, you're fine, everything's okay, I promise, come on, stop crying..."
If he crawled in the backseat to cuddle, likely they'd take it as proof, at first, and it would take at least a half-hour to get them all cried out until he could get to the bottom of this and reassure them. He didn't have that kind of time.
"Hey," he said, nice but firm, and prayed it wouldn't make her cry worse. "I'm absolutely not broken." Ludy gave him a doubtful look and sniffled, irises even more intensely green with how red the rest of her eyes were. He pointed his index up peremptorily. "Not!" Then he tapped her nose.
"Nnh!" she protested, batting at his hand. She sniffled; he produced a Kleenex.
"Here, blow. Good girl. You okay now?" He gentled his voice, caressed her hair. "Everything's fine. I've got to drive now, baby, okay?"
He sat back down in his seat. No crying started back up. None of her siblings took it up. Phew. Feeling more awesome than he'd ever felt dodging real, lead bullets on the field, he started driving again. He went fast, as if maybe he could leave the topic far behind. Hey, who knew, maybe they'd get distracted watching the scenery zip past.
Or maybe they'd start blowing chunks. Either or.
House Rules
(Anonymous) 2011-07-02 05:00 am (UTC)(link)Re: House Rules
no subject
also abit confused why the kids think daddy!Zack is broken..... but pratical!Satsuki is ~<3
no subject
The confused bit is exactly as I want things. Bwahahaha. Zack is also very confused, so that's okay. >:D
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and the teamwork ones. xD
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You're evil.
:D
no subject
The traditions drabble almost seems complete as is.
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I love that Denzel has Tifa's last name. Somehow that just made me *heart*. And it sounds like he has some shenganigans planned. Phi seems like well developed character.
Also: there are only a few limited pervy things one can do with a baseball bat. What the hell has Denzel walked in on before to put that thought in his head....?
I didn't quite catch why the kid's thought Zack was broken. That was probably intentional, come to think of it. Which makes me think that's a plot point of either Jenova's creepiness or Zack's love life...or both.
no subject
Phi is an adorable dork type, and a really good friend. ♥ Denzel's shenanigans would be mostly to explain the familial arrangement in great, entirely factual detail. "this is my adoptive mother the bartender, and this is her husband-type boyfriend, he's like a big brother to me, and this is her girlfriend, and my mom's girlfriend and boyfriend share this one other guy who's teaching me baseball. Oh, and there's that guy living in the attic who half of 'em hate and half of 'em sometimes bang, and which half is which changes around some days. I'll tell you when I figure out the pattern. Also I have a little sister who isn't actually related to me, but my mom is her mother figure too so hey why not, but her dad is some other guy (oh right, he adopted her too) but he's really cool. He hates attic-guy though. I guess he's like my uncle. ... did I also tell you about my cousins Nanaki the lion-thing and Yuffie the empress of Wutai?" She'd either figure he's pulling her leg or that he's living in a place he really needs to be adopted out of. XD
No idea yet, but he seems to have the firm idea that when Zack is involved you'd best assume perverted things are going to happen at some point in some way, and save your sanity not trying to figure out the details. ThoughIMHO it's more a family joke than something that actually happened and which he saw/heard about.
The inability to figure out why the kiddies think Zack is broken is entirely intentional. ... not sure how you got love life out of it though. XD
no subject
Ah, I'm going to love Phi then. My favorite type of character. :)
How I got love life out of that? I...have no idea. I might be the broken one come to think of it.
no subject