(naruto crack ficlet) team seven cuteness yay

[askerian]

Who's being a total spamwhore today? XD;

Okay so this was written in ten minutes, out of NOTHING. Thanks to Windshades for making me think up the first sentence, and then prodding me with every sentence I pulled out with a "...and then?". Seriously, that was amazing. XD As a result, it's not the best characterized or paced thing, but at least I had fun.

Actually, I don't even hate Sai. (the dick comments! XD) But Sakura and Naruto sure don't care much for him. XD (no, love, no spoilers. Promise.)



"No, seriously, I'm just glad you're not wearing an ass-bow."

Sasuke froze in his tracks, and stared. "... a... what?"

"An ass-bow. I used to wonder what it would be like to find you again, and in half of them you showed up in that purple thing, and then I laughed in your face and you stomped off in a huff."

They were still standing in the middle of the field, in combat-ready positions. But somehow the pre-fighting tension had totally vanished.

"... You were... thinking... about me in an ass-bow," Sasuke repeated slowly, half in wonder and half in utter contempt. Sakura wondered if he'd forgotten that much of what Naruto was truly like.

She would have wondered longer, but then Sai apparently decided that the pause had lasted long enough and moved to attack. Not a word of warning, just lethal intent and a bloody line traced on a summoning scroll. Sasuke's cold-as-ice mask slammed back on, the bewilderment disappearing as he turned to face the new threat. Naruto yelled a protest -- at being ignored, at the fight starting up again, she didn't know.

Sasuke was still moving his hands through seals when Sakura punched Sai in the head from behind, knocking him out cleanly.

Sasuke blinked again, and Sakura desperately fought the urge to giggle in pride. Now she was the one who was totally bewildering him.

"So," she started brightly. "How about we have a chat. Just the three of us. I do mean a chat, Naruto," she warned him. Naruto pouted.

"What makes you think--" Sasuke started.

"Or I could knock you out, and have Naruto sit on you, and then we'd have our chat."

Sasuke was sneering again.

"Come on, scaredy-cat, we're not gonna eat you."

"Do you believe I'm scared?"

"Nah, I believe you're an asshole, but that hasn't changed. At least you're not an asshole in ass-bow."

Sasuke's control on his temper slipped. "Will you drop the fucking ass-bow thing already?"

"Seriously, Sasuke, we just want to talk. It's not as if we're expecting the cavalry; there's no risk in losing a few minutes."

She had more pride than to try the puppy-eyes trick. Naruto didn't. "Here! We'll even sit on this rock, and you can sit... uh... on that trunk. Or something." Naruto sat, hands under his thigh, and grinned at Sasuke, who was staring at him as if he was trying to figure out how many times Naruto had been dropped on his head before it took.

He looked at Sakura, too, as if expecting her to be sane. She sat on another rock, primly, knees together, and gave him her best winning smile. "Just a few words, Sasuke. Promise."

Sai was stirring. She picked up a rock and threw it at his head, and went back to smiling.

Sasuke's eyelid twitched.

"We'll follow you until you listen, bastard." Naruto was still grinning happily. Of course if Sasuke hadn't left yet, he wasn't going to.

"Just a minute, Sasuke-kun," she added.

"I've been listening for more than that, and you haven't made sense yet," he snorted, but he did lean against the closest tree gingerly. Naruto and Sakura exchanged a quick, triumphing glance.

"So how long d'you think you have before you gotta hightail it out of Sound?"

Sasuke actually blinked. For a doujutsu user, it was Significant. Sakura refrained from bouncing.

"... What?"

"Well, we thought," she explained, taking pity on him, "if you were done with Orochimaru, you'd be long gone already. But you aren't. So, how long do you think you will need, and where should we ambush the ninjas chasing you?"

There was a difference between a silent, sneering Sasuke and a silent, stunned Sasuke. This was definitely the second.

Naruto rolled his eyes. "What? don't tell us it doesn't make sense. They won't be expecting us."

Sasuke finally recovered enough to snarl, "That's because you won't be here!"

Sakura sighed. Ah, Sasuke and his denial. "Of course we'll be here, silly. It's a good team strategy."

And back to stunned.

Sasuke stared at her, then at Naruto. Then at her. Then Naruto. They didn't look away. They didn't stop smiling. They probably looked as manically happy as each other.

"... Whatever."

Snorting, Sasuke turned away.

"Two months, three weeks. The bridge on the Naga river."

He left quickly, not wanting to give them any time to reply.

On the ground, Sai stirred again. Sakura was too busy dancing with Naruto to care.




*feeling a lot happier now* :3

Comments

[mikkeneko.livejournal.com]

Ass-bow.

*snort*

[askerian]

O:D

[aishuu.livejournal.com]

I think this is one of my fav Naruto fics I've seen lately. You just illustrate the "spirit" of team seven so well... <3 As always, great work.

[askerian]

^_^;;; it's total fluff-crack and it could do with some editing. but heh, glad you like. ^___^

[aishuu.livejournal.com]

It just "feels" right. It's been a while since I saw something that "felt" right.

[qem_chibati]

Hee~

Tis the silly season and I am greatly amused. ^_^

[askerian]

:D

[sparklemagpie.livejournal.com]

You gotta stop making me love you so much! XD Ass bow! Hah!

[askerian]

no! nevah!

you know you want to unwrap your present, baby.

[sparklemagpie.livejournal.com]

*SNARF* AHAHAHAHAHAHAA! Of course I'll unwrap it, it's Sasuke ass! What fangirl doesn't want that for Christmas? ^^

[arabesque]

♥~~~~ You have Team 7 DOWN and I love you for it. :D

...That's so sweet. Weirdly so, but still sweet.

[(Anonymous)]

*throws back her head and roars with laughter*

Oh dear. That was just... too, too much fun to read. Have I mentioned that I love your drabbles? You pack so much into so very little. I bow to your skill. *does so*

I don't mind the pacing at all. The scene just... FEELS right. Granted, it's taunting at my imagination by trying to get me to guess what was going on beforehand and what's going to happen next. But hey, that's half the fun!

And somehow, I CAN see the reunion going this way. Sasuke TRYING to be the cold loner, the other two simply being... expectant - then Sasuke gives in without ADMITTING he's giving in, because that's the way Team 7 works. *bares teeth in a smirk* I almost feel sorry for the people coming after him. ALMOST.


Sai's an odd character. Very irritating, but interesting at the same time. It's rather amusing, actually, to compare how he and Sasuke are different, because in some ways they're very similar and in others completely different. I think I scribbled out a rant to myself, trying to sort it out, at one point. :-P

I'm willing to bet that at some point, he's going to backstab somebody, though. Never, ever trust the smiling ones, and we already know he's there on a secret agenda - at least in part. :-P

[ivyadrena.livejournal.com]

omfg... xD

thank you soverymuch. I needed that! *huggle*

[malika.livejournal.com]

XD too cute. Sasuke in an assbow. ::snickers::

ASSBOW lala~

[stripedpetunia.livejournal.com]

!!! XD

Sometimes, I swear to god, you must know Team 7 better than Kishimoto.

What did you sell to which immortal hell-demon for that? *is ready to take notes*

[nekare.livejournal.com]

You so own my soul. Priceless, and cute and I love your stunned Sasuke and kickass Sakura.

[valles-uf.livejournal.com]

*cheers madly*

Sannin Sakura! YEAH! And seeing Sasuke's expression on meeting her... *rapturous sigh* it was playing right across the back of my eyelids when I paused between paragraphs. ^_^

Why, yes, Mr. Uchiha, that is what you tried to throw away. Good thing she's too stubborn to give up, ne?

All three of them ring very true to me (Sai I can't comment on I'm shamefully behind on my manga reading), and the entire scene is caught on this delightful razor's edge between poignant and funny. Well done, madam!

Actually, I think that this is one more point in favor of something that I become more and more certain of the more I think about it - the Sakura we see, at least during the first half of the series, is nothing but a pretty mask that the real, 'Inner' Sakura puts on so she can convince people to like her.

Which, aside from the fact that she actually makes it work, and does make friends, sounds remarkably like another character we know...

Ja, -n
(pondering)

[mojojessjo.livejournal.com]

You win the internets. All of them. Everywhere. In all multiverses.

*is happy, happy, happy!*

[toki-usagi.livejournal.com]

All hail the mighty butt-bows of doom!

I loved Sasuke's failed attempts to remain his old I-don't-give-ashit-you-can't-surprise-me self. Sakura shocking him multiple times was absolutely priceless! And the knocking Sai out...twice!

*dissolves into incoherent fangirling*

[crazy-toffee.livejournal.com]

Assssss-boooowwwwww *dies*

You write a mean, awesome Sakura. :) It makes my day.

[maldoror-gw.livejournal.com]

Sai was stirring. She picked up a rock and threw it at his head, and went back to smiling.

Sasuke's eyelid twitched.

WHAHAHAHHAHA!

Oh, I really needed that, thanks. That was priceless ^__^ Especially the end, the 'two months' bit, that was, how can I say it, slight fluff but with edge! Just very Sasuke. I'd say more but I have to go :3

[rainbowlasers.livejournal.com]

*rofl* XDDD Squee! Cute and crack XD my favorite combo!!!

Let's all throw rocks at Sai and see if he can wake up. Damn, Sakura, brain damage XDDD Reallyyy. Also, yay for throwing off Sasuke!

I'm going to go whine about how I want our emo-kid back. Or at least a cameo appearance. God, a day in the life of Orochimaru's sextoy pet new container for all I care! XD

[yuenoclow.livejournal.com]

*Dies laughing*

[rurounitriv.livejournal.com]

Heheheh. I guess even Sasuke knows when he's outmatched, and Sakura and Naruto together are a match for just about anyone. XD

Thanks, I really needed a bit of floof!

[annwyd.livejournal.com]

This is absolutely darling and so true to all the characters. Your Team 7 kicks ass. ♥

[ycardaria.livejournal.com]

lmfao - nice.

=D

It took me a few seconds to get the ass-bow comment. I thought you meant "X-MAS bow" all wrapped and prettily until I got to the 'purple thing' - then it was like, "....oh!! /face!palm"

[karit.livejournal.com]

Sometimes I wonder why I love Naruto so much and then I read your fics and think, "Oh yeah, that's why." You do Team 7 so perfectly. XD

Naruto rolled his eyes. "What? don't tell us it doesn't make sense. They won't be expecting us."

Sasuke finally recovered enough to snarl, "That's because you won't be here!"

Sakura sighed. Ah, Sasuke and his denial. "Of course we'll be here, silly. It's a good team strategy."

BEST THREE PARAGRAPHS EVER.

Poor Sasuke. He shouldn't have left... it gave them time to figure out how to manipulate confuse the hell out of him. XDXDXD

[complexphoenix.livejournal.com]

Spamwhoring? What is this spamwhoring? I don't see any spamwhoring. All I see is Asuka posting stuff. Asuka posting stuff is good.

AHAHA! So Sasuke's expecting them to hate him, but they treat him like a teammate! And he's wierded out! But still! The teamlove!

And I love Sakura knocking out Sai. I know zilch about him (and don't want to know anything) but Sakura pwning an idiot is always so, so satisfying.

[killua]

Man, you make me love Team 7 so much. ...

Heart.

[nacchi-camui.livejournal.com]

XDD je vois parfaitement Sai se faire re-assomer par Sakura alors qu'il est à terre XD le pauvre X3

[miwa.livejournal.com]

That had better happen in the manga. >_>

[lukita.livejournal.com]

You wrote Team 7 and it is CUTE! I love team dynamic fics from you and the crack is just bonus. XD

And I like Sai, but only for his dick comments.

[andartha.livejournal.com]

*hearts* Simply brilliant!

[miko-no-da.livejournal.com]

HEEEEE!!!! *dances with Sakura and Naruto*

Yes, the sense of team unity wins again. How can Sasuke possibly argue with them? There's just nothing to argue. ^___________^

[lissiel.livejournal.com]

You know? You write, like, the only Sakura in the Universe that I actually really really *like*. I mean, most people can do her as tolerable, if they aren't out and out trying to make her spineless, but you just make her *cool*. An honest equal to the boys. You're so awesome for sharing things like this with us. Thank you!

loves on teh asuka

[edenfalling]

*LOVES YOU*

That SO needs to happen, for real. Just, the way they won't give up on him, and the way Sasuke's all WTF??? and then gives in without admitting that he's giving in, and Naruto's utter randomness, and Sakura taking everybody by surprise, and...

*happy sigh*

It should be 'triumphant,' not 'triumphing.' And in Naruto's "What? don't tell us it doesn't make sense," the 'don't' should be capitalized. *removes editing hat*

[nekostella.livejournal.com]

Euuuh j'adore lol Mais ^^; * se snet honteuse* c'est quoi un ass-bow? désolé lol

[askerian]

XD la grosse corde violette avec le kiki sur les fesse que tous les gens du Son portent autour de la taille.

[nekostella.livejournal.com]

Comme sur les sd que t'as fait dans un précédent post? XDD Purée j'ai l'image mental XDDDDD *se roule par terre*

Merci pour cette précision XD *s'en va relire avec l'image en tête*

[decorchan.livejournal.com]

Ahh, I love this <3 You insist that it's hastily done, but it's still really good. I did spot a punctuation thingie once, though I think that's the only thing.

Insane!Sakura and Naruto! WTF!Sasuke! XD *is totally being a fangirl*

[sailor-comet.livejournal.com]

I adore the way Sakura keeps beating on Sai. XD

[elfiepike.livejournal.com]

if only the real comic did this! no, seriously. i love love love kishimoto for showing us the--well, not the "grown-up" but the older-teenager versions of nearly everyone but i gotta admit that at this point, i really just want to have sasuke either back or confirmed as Not Coming Back. this sai person rankles me, i must wait for others to read ahead and let me know if i'll like it. (a taste-tester, if you will.)

and then there's this, which is so exactly how it should go, so even when it doesn't, i can come back here and remind myself. so thank you. and yeah, i'm a little delirious, but still.

[shiny-glor-chan.livejournal.com]

*giggles* Best fic ever! *tosses another rock at Sai* I'm not of the Sai fan, at least he makes all those remarks that make Naruto flip out.

...ass-bow. Hehehe... There was a picture on deviantart with Sasuke wearing the ass-bow outfit and asking Sakura to unwrap him. She said no then he turned to Naruto and asked him... Or it was the other way around. Don't remember... ><;;

Again I say this was awesome. Wish it would happen in the manga. I'd be a happy fangirl. ^-^;;

[smoking-panda.livejournal.com]

*squee* Teamwork!!!!

^-^