"I know." Mathow was sitting on the reef, the strong coil of his tail tucked against a rock. "I was the one who ordered them to."
Rylan stared at his brother. "... But the hospital needs those things."
"The hospital is a waste of time and resources."
"How can saving people's live be a waste?!"
Mathow didn't do Rylan the small mercy of averting his hard, unyielding eyes. "They're going to die anyway."
"How can you say that? We can find ways to save them--"
"The quakes are getting worse. The islands are erupting. There aren't enough ships to evacuate everyone. There's nowhere to evacuate them to, anyway. Foods stocks are low. Soon there will be plagues, if enough people survive. Not enough vaccines to treat everyone. Should I continue?"
Rylan swallowed. "... No. Statistically speaking... I guess you're right." He shook his head, gave his brother a pleading look. "But we can't just look at the statistics and decide not to even try! People aren't statistics!"
"One person dying is a tragedy," Mathow quoted quietly. "A thousand is a statistic." He shook his head, looked up at his brother. "There comes a point where we need to cut our losses."
Rylan stared at his brother, speechless and yet somehow unsurprised.
"Caring for every single individual who can't fend for himself is a beautiful ideal. But mostly, it's a luxury we can't afford."
Mathow closed his eyes, and when he opened them again, he stared out at the ocean, releasing Rylan from their hold. His voice was quiet, unusually so.
"Do you understand, Rylan? Love is a luxury. We can't afford to let it stop us."
Rylan stopped breathing; and when Mathow spoke again, he already knew what he would hear.
"I won't let it stop me."
Rylan watched the shadow of his brother darting under the waves, and laughed a little, because it was that or choking. It was the closest his brother had ever come to saying out loud that he cared. It figured, that his first 'I love you' would be followed by 'but I'm still going to let you die'.
XD yay for centuries-ago prequels!
Rylan stared at his brother. "... But the hospital needs those things."
"The hospital is a waste of time and resources."
"How can saving people's live be a waste?!"
Mathow didn't do Rylan the small mercy of averting his hard, unyielding eyes. "They're going to die anyway."
"How can you say that? We can find ways to save them--"
"The quakes are getting worse. The islands are erupting. There aren't enough ships to evacuate everyone. There's nowhere to evacuate them to, anyway. Foods stocks are low. Soon there will be plagues, if enough people survive. Not enough vaccines to treat everyone. Should I continue?"
Rylan swallowed. "... No. Statistically speaking... I guess you're right." He shook his head, gave his brother a pleading look. "But we can't just look at the statistics and decide not to even try! People aren't statistics!"
"One person dying is a tragedy," Mathow quoted quietly. "A thousand is a statistic." He shook his head, looked up at his brother. "There comes a point where we need to cut our losses."
Rylan stared at his brother, speechless and yet somehow unsurprised.
"Caring for every single individual who can't fend for himself is a beautiful ideal. But mostly, it's a luxury we can't afford."
Mathow closed his eyes, and when he opened them again, he stared out at the ocean, releasing Rylan from their hold. His voice was quiet, unusually so.
"Do you understand, Rylan? Love is a luxury. We can't afford to let it stop us."
Rylan stopped breathing; and when Mathow spoke again, he already knew what he would hear.
"I won't let it stop me."
Rylan watched the shadow of his brother darting under the waves, and laughed a little, because it was that or choking. It was the closest his brother had ever come to saying out loud that he cared. It figured, that his first 'I love you' would be followed by 'but I'm still going to let you die'.