and more cloneness! o_o;;
Duo was still sitting against his bit of wall behind the chest of drawers when finally Heero came back to life. He'd been watching him very closely; he didn't know how long it had been. Easily two hours, probably three or more. The clone had been whimpering and moaning a lot, but luckily he hadn't been loud and no one was around to hear anyway.
He saw Heero grit his teeth, then realize that he was watched and freeze. He glanced up, seemed to recognize him, and sat up slowly. Duo realized that he was absently stroking the muzzle of his gun, finger ready at the trigger, just in case, but he didn't stop.
"... feel better?" he asked quietly, just in case the headache was still there.
"The worst is past," the clone replied. His eyes narrowed, and Duo knew that he'd noticed his wariness.
"Yeah? Well, if that wasn't the worst part, I'd be surprised. Ya made more noise than I thought." He was pretty sure Soldiers didn't whimper like that for less than shrapnel tearing limbs off or something.
Heero frowned, looking dissatisfied with himself. "I'll try not to make so much noise again."
"Don't worry about it," Duo assured. "The sounds meant yer still alive. I swear I thought ya stopped breathin' at some points."
Heero shrugged, still scowling faintly. "It happens sometimes. As long as I don't bite my tongue it's usually harmless."
... Harmless. Not breathing. Oookay. "Well, I figure ya can take your time... " he commented, casting a look at the sky. "Still a bit too hot to start walkin' again."
"...oh." Heero leaned back against the wall, closed his eyes and sighed quietly.
"Did anyone walk by?"
"Nah, nobody around, but that's no surprise. The predators tend to come out at night."
"Maybe we should leave now, then. I can walk. I won't collapse now."
Duo's eyes narrowed. How reassuring. Not. "Yeah, but it's better if yer closer to 100%, right? A few minutes won't hurt none. 'sides, yer lookin' pale."
"I'll be in better health to fight, but we'll also have a higher chance of meeting people -- pale?"
"Yeah, ya know? Not so dark? Pale. Just sit back for a few, drink some water."
Heero grunted.
"Believe me, I know pale when I see it. Seen my kids like that too often."
For a second he had a feeling Heero was going to reply 'yes, sir' but finally he didn't. He just nodded and started looking through his pack for a bottle of water.
"Think fast," Duo said, smirking, and tossed him the bottle.
The second after Heero had jumped up into a crouch and was holding the neck of the bottle as if he was this close to throwing it back in his face. His eyes were cold and calculating, strangely empty. Stunned, the scavenger could only watch as the clone brought himself under control, hands tightening around his shotgun.
Heero took a deep breath and sank against the wall again. "Don't throw things at my head."
"Uhhh... it's just water, buddy. Not a bomb."
The clone scowled at him. "How should I know?"
"What a thing to ask," Duo snorted. "If I threw a bomb at you, I'd blow up too. Besides, why would I waste one on you?
The clone gave him a Look, as if he was stupid. "That's called a conditioned response."
Duo shrugged. "Then uncondition yerself. If yer that jumpy, my kids'll have a field day."
"That's what I've been doing." His eyelid twitched. "If you do that with another clone, they'll kill you before realizing that it was harmless."
... huh. "I don't wanna see the kids hurt just 'cuz they wanna play catch," he warned.
Heero heaved a deep sigh. "I just wasn't expecting it. But since you tell me that the children do throw things to each other, then I won't be so surprised."
Duo blinked. "Why'd ya think I told ya to think fast? I DID warn ya."
The clone scowled heavily at him. "You didn't tell me "catch" or "watch out". It was...just words."
Right. Duo never knew which figure of speech the guy would know and which would leave him confused. Some expressions were just so usual to hear that he didn't even remember their original meaning could be different. "Guess I'll have to watch that then. Forgot ya don't know regular stuff. From now on, if someone tells ya to "think fast", they're probably gonna throw somethin' at ya. Got it?" he explained, finding more patience to deal with him.
"I'll remember," Heero replied seriously. "Weird code."
Duo laughed; he looked so puzzled. "Not really. If someone throws somethin' at ya, you have to think fast or else it'll hit ya."
"Ah... Yes, maybe," the clone admitted, head tilting on the side slightly.
Duo started chuckling at the expression on Heero's face. It was very much like teaching his kids. But his kids often took it badly when he laughed about them, thinking that he was laughing at them, and he didn't know if Heero could get the difference, so he managed to stop.
"So, are ya feelin' better now? I think we can go out without havin' our bacon cooked."
Heero got on his feet slowly. "How long did I stay unconscious?"
"Almost three hours."
The clone frowned, as if disappointed in himself. Duo didn't know how the hell he'd expected to control something like that; he still remembered his pained whimpers and uncontrollable twitching.
He stood up, dusting off his pants before shouldering his shotgun, and took a quick peek outside of their hiding place, nodding to himself. No one in sight...
He glanced back, to discover that the clone's nose had started to bleed sluggishly and that he was wiping it off with the back of his hand. Duo frowned. "Shit... just like one of my kids..." he muttered, and pulled a battered handkerchief out of his pocket, holding it out to Heero. "Wipe your nose properly, will ya?"
Clearly surprised, the clone blinked at his handkerchief before taking it gingerly, as if he wasn't quite sure what to do with it. Duo couldn't believe that he'd never needed one before, though. More probably it just hadn't occurred to him to bother, so long as it didn't drip on the ground and leave a trail or something.
Heero started wiping the blood off, but in such a way that it just spread it around more. Duo gave a little sigh and stepped toward him. "Jeeze... you're just making a mess..." He held out his hand for the handkerchief back.
The clone looked uncomfortable with his closeness, so he quickly reached out and efficiently wiped his nose. "There."
The scavenger shook his head and shoved the handkerchief in his pocket. "Man, and here I thought I could palm this sort of stuff out on you."
"That sort of stuff?" the clone echoed, puzzled.
Duo chuckled again before motioning Heero to follow. "I wipe my kids' noses all the time," he explained as they slipped out of their hiding place. "They don't care what they look like as long as they can play. Someone's gotta take care of 'em."
"Oh. But why should they care if it doesn't hinder them?"
"Ya think just like 'em then. It's not about them bein' "hindered", it's about someone takin' care of them an' makin' sure they ain't snotty or dirty."
"...oh."
That, Duo was aware, was his 'I still don't get it, but I'm going to pretend I do' standard reply. He looked at him; the clone was feeling under his nose, fingertips red with fresh blood.
"It's about caring," he explained quietly. "It's about doin' stuff that they wouldn't think to do for themselves. I wanna give my kids that, just a little, even if it means wipin' their noses every five minutes." He pulled the handkerchief out of his pocket again. "An' here... hold this to yer nose until ya stop bleedin'. Nose bleeds are a bitch."
Heero nodded and obeys in silence.
"So, d'ya understand now?"
"... not really. But maybe I will understand later." He looked vaguely apologetic under the permanent scowl. "Your sentences make sense grammatically, but I don't have enough background information to extract the deeper meaning."
Duo laughed. "That's the first time anyone ever said I was deep."
"You are. You're confusing too."
"Yeah? Well, I happen to think I'm a pretty simple kinda guy."
Heero grunted, but apparently they were stretching his abilities to make conversation, so he didn't reply.
It was good that the afternoon was so hot, Duo reflected; that meant talking with Heero to fend off boredom wasn't suicidal so much as vaguely unsafe. Not a lot of people would be crazy enough to get out in this temperature.
"So... anythin' else ya wanna ask me? Seein' how I'm so intelligent an' all..."
"I don't have questions now. Can I ask them as I think them, or would it be better to remember them and wait ?"
"Hmmm... you can do whatever ya want. We've still got a long walk ahead o' us. I just thought conversation would be better than silence, ya know? Guess I'm too used to bein' around my kids," he added with a chuckle.
Heero blinked at him. "Conversation can be heard."
"An' so what if it's heard? We don't gotta be completely silent or nothin'. Long as we're not shoutin' or nothin'."
"If you think it's not too big a risk."
Duo shrugged. "Just keep the yellin' down. I haven't seen nothin' movin' anyway, 'cept some birds and stuff."
"I don't yell," the clone replied, looking vaguely offended.
Duo smiled and looked up, staring up at the sky instead. The sky was blue, with a few puffy clouds drifting lazily.
From the corner of his eye, he could see the clone doing the same, probably wondering what was so interesting up there.
"What are you looking at?"
"The sky."
"Why?"
Duo looked at Heero. "Because it's there. Because it's pretty today."
Heero shook his head but refused to comment.
"Does everythin' have to have a reason?"
"Of course," the clone replied with a puzzled blink. "Everything a human does has a reason."
"That's an answer I expect from you."
"Then why did you ask?"
"Fine, I like the sky. Seen too many dark nights an' storms in my life. I appreciate a nice sky to look at. It's peaceful. An' I asked to see what your answer would be."
"Oh."
That was the 'you confuse the hell outta me but I'm gonna pretend I get it' oh once again. He gave Heero a grin. "There's reasons for everythin', just like ya say, but when it comes to humans, our reason may not be logical."
"...Oh. Yes, of course. But when they're illogical, they're more likely to get you hurt."
"Yeah, but who says people can't do something just because they like it? Because they enjoy it or want to?"
"But that has to be a logical decision to enjoy. Not a spur of the moment thing. Otherwise, they may not realize that they're putting themselves in danger. It may make your children happy to play in the middle of the street, but they could be seen."
He had sort of a point there, even though he missed the larger picture. Duo smiled. "I suppose that's right. I don't let my kids out on the street unless they're in a group an' I'm there. But sometimes, people want what they can't have. They want what's dangerous to them. They know it can hurt 'em, but they still want it."
Heero snorted. "That's stupid."
Duo grinned again. "Of course it's stupid. I told ya it wasn't logical, didn't I? A lot in life ain't logical."
Heero nodded. He was looking annoyed.
"What's wrong?"
"I don't like things to be illogical."
Duo couldn't help but laugh. "You can be logical all ya want, but there'll still be stuff ya can't control."
Heero frowned, visibly thinking about a specific incident. "But I should be able to."
"Able to what? Control everything?"
"Yes," the cone replied, visibly frustrated. "Like my body. I can fall asleep in ten seconds, regulate my heartbeat and my temperature. "I should be able to control those--reactions too. Is it possible?"
Duo blinked. "What reactions? I mean, heartbeat an' breathin' is one thing... I've heard o' people who could do that."
Heero's scowl was reaching full-out deathglare proportions. "This morning," he explained with reluctance.
Duo stopped abruptly and turned to gape at Heero. "Y-yer not serious, are ya?"
"Is it controllable or not?"
He couldn't help it, he started to laugh. "Oh my god... I can't believe yer askin' that! You just asked if you could control one of the most uncontrollable things about people. Lemme tell ya, when it comes to sex, all logic flies out the window."
"... Well, sexual need is an animal instinct. But we're not mere animals."
"No, but it's a baser instinct. You're a healthy male, ain't no way to control mornin' wood. Ya just got to deal with it when it," he snickered, "pops up.
Heero glared at him, offended. "Stop laughing at me," he ordered, growling just a tiny bit.
"Sorry, sorry! It's just... I mean, I never expected to have to give you The Talk. But I guess those trippy mad scientists were expectin' the drugs to keep y'all... uhmm... uninterested."
Heero scowled and looked away. "I don't need sexual urges to add to my life. It's already complicated enough."
"Yeah, but it just proves that yer human, now don't it?"
Heero just stopped walking. Surprised, Duo stopped and turned around.
"... I... I suppose..."
Duo smiled. The clone looked so lost.
"But it's. It's weird."
He stepped closer to Heero. "What's weird?"
"I don't know what to do about it, I don't know what to expect. And the feeling took me by surprise."
Duo nodded patiently. "That's pretty normal."
Heero looked up at him, eyes wide. "It is?"
"Yeah. Happens to me, too... I just know what to do."
"Oh."
The stare Heero was directing his way was pretty uncomfortable. Duo coughed. "Uhh... I mean, when did you start... uhm, you know?"
"Reacting? A few weeks ago, maybe two months, but it doesn't happen often." He frowned thoughtfully. "...Though it's happening more and more often these days."
"Huh... probably 'cuz those drugs are burning out." He thought on it a little longer. "Uhh... what have ya been doing to... uhm... get rid of it?"
"Nothing. I wait for it to go away. But it wasn't so long in leaving before."
Duo blinked and tried to tell himself he wasn't blushing. The mental picture was too vivid. "Oh... uhh... Usually you can get rid of it by... uh... thinking of something else. I do that. Think of something dull and boring."
Heero frowned. "I don't know if my thoughts can be considered anything else than dull and boring."
"Then think of rats," Duo replied with a weary shrug. "That'll put a woody down real fast."
Heero nodded very seriously. "I'll remember that.
God, but he was kind of cute when -- no. "Well, then there's the cold shower method... water as cold as ya can stand it, but since there ain't much water around, I don't think ya can do that."
"I don't fear the cold anyway. It would have to be way below freezing before it hinders me in any way."
"Yeah, but if it's cold enough to make your boys crawl back home, it does its job."
Heero gave him a puzzled look. "My boys?"
"Slang. Your balls? Uhmm..." he tried to remember the other, more classy word. "... t-testicles?"
"Oh."
"Cold and hard-ons don't go together."
"I'll remember."
Heero stared at him for a few seconds, then frowned thoughtfully. "You're red. Why?"
Duo's eyes widened and he felt his cheeks burn. "Oh well... uhhh... I'm just... I mean... there's another way to... uhm... get rid of a hardon."
Heero looked clearly interested as he waited for Duo to finish. The braided man wondered if he would go far if he tried to run away and hide.
"Uhh...youcanjackoff..."
"What?"
"... you can jack off..." Duo mumbled, more slowly this time.
"What's jack off?"
Oh god, that innocent look on an eighteen-year old body. Duo's face flamed. "Uhmm... Masturbation?"
Heero blinked. "I recognize the word, but I don't know what it means."
Mortified, Duo tried to explain. "It means... you... touch... yourself. I mean, stroke until... until you come."
"Oh."
And now he was looking interested. Someone kill Duo, quick. Before he could ask...
"Come?"
Yeah, just that.
"Y-yeah... uhhhhhh... e-e-ejaculate...?"
Heero watched him for a minute, then nodded. "I don't know a lot about reproduction. Sorry," he said; he didn't look quite as stiff as usual. "It's annoying," he added with a frown. "I don't see the point of having an erection if I'm not trying to have sex."
Duo coughed. "Well, it's just a biological thing, I guess. Make sure the parts are still workin'... or somethin'... And... and masturbatin'... it... it feels... good."
"Good how?"
Ack, he looked interested. He probably hadn't experienced a lot of things that felt good in his life, so Duo could see the appeal, but... Still. "Just... good. I can't describe it, since it's different for everyone. Me, it feels warm... nice... just... good." And that didn't seem to be very helpful for Heero. "Look, believe me when I say I can't describe it, okay?" he snapped, flustered.
Heero didn't answer, just looked down at the ground and kept walking. Duo sighed.
"You'll just have to find out yourself what to do and how it feels."
Heero shrugged. "I don't see the point. It's not as if I need the practice for when I'm going to have sex."
"Well, I don't know the reason for it either. Except that it feels good, and... well... I guess that's it."
They climbed over some rubble and negotiated a path between twisted, rusted metal bars that had circled a garden. Out of the blue, Heero asked, "Does sex feel good in the same way ?"
Duo almost walked into a pillar. "Uhh... what?"
"How does having sex feel?... What's having sex exactly? I mean.. I know the basics, but..."
Duo stuttered. "Well... it's... it's good... or, it's supposed to be good. Not in the same way as jacking off though. And, well, you find someone you like, or are attracted to and you just... uhhhh... do it...?"
"It doesn't help, but I guess I won't ever be in a position where it will matter," the clone replied with a shrug. "I wonder why I wanted to know. I'll forget about it."
"Nah, I guess this is stuff ya need to know. And anyway, who says ya won't find someone ya wanna... uh.... have sex with? You might fall in love. That's illogical, too."
Heero snorted. "I'm a Soldier. Who says I can... fall in love? I don't even know what it implies. Isn't it supposed to happen to both people, too?"
"Well... love is trickier. Sometimes you fall in love with someone that don't love ya back. Love and sex... they don't have to be two-way streets. They should, and it's better if they are, but life ain't always that simple."
He had a feeling he was only confusing Heero more. "But even if I want to have sex with someone, shouldn't the other person want it too? If they don't want to, I'll have a problem anyway. I don't have a clue what to do. And... I don't think. I mean. I don't want... I don't know... I feel that they should want it too..." he continued with a frown.
Duo nodded patently. "Yeah, the other person should want it, too. I agree, it's better if both people want it. That's the way it should be. But remember, I told ya about those who don't always wait," he added with a dark look. "And you never know, buddy. They say it's instinctual. You just stick Tab A into Slot B, and that's it.
"That easy?" the clone asked doubtfully.
"Well, okay, maybe not. There's other stuff too. But the basics of it is simple."
"Like what?" Heero asked, still watching Duo with his innocent blue eyes. Duo was decidedly feeling unnerved.
"Well, usually there's uhmm... foreplay? That's like kissin' and touchin' and stuff."
"Kissing? ... on the cheek?" the clone asked with a thoughtful frown. "
"Urrrrrrrrrr... yeah."
"Does it really fit in a sexual context?"
"You generally kiss on the lips, if you wanna show affection... like, sexually. I kiss my kids on the cheek an' forhead, but that ain't intimate."
Heero appeared to consider that. "I guess you can kiss people in a lot of places."
Duo's face flamed again. "Yeah, kissin' is good in other places, too. It depends."
Duo didn't remember having been that embarrassed for years. He was glad to let Heero think undisturbed.
"I can understand touching, I suppose. Sometimes it feels nice, when it's not too hard. Even if..." he lowered his voice," it's. Scary."
Duo's eyes narrowed in suspicion. When his kids referred to scary touches, he usually knew what they were on about. He was going to tread carefully there.
"Well, it's mostly soft touches, stroking, pettin' an' stuff. It feels nice. Same with kissin'. 'Course, not everyone does it the right way, or makes sure to be gentle."
Heero nodded. "I understand. But even when it's soft, sometimes it's s-scary."
Duo couldn't believe the clone was stammering. Were his suppositions right?
"...Even when. when they don't want to hurt me. Not that I've been touched all that much," he added as on an afterthought.
The scavenger blinked. "You've been touched softly and it scared you? Was it the touch or your reactions to it that was scary?"
"I don't know. Both."
"... The little girl... She kissed my cheek. And patted my shoulder. I've never been that scared before... Never since then either. She was just.. so frail."
Relieved that he wasn't dealing with abuse, Duo smiled. "Then it's your own feelings you got afraid of, the touches were just a trigger."
Heero seemed to struggle with something for a few seconds. Duo waited patiently, and then the words came pouring out. "She was soft and --nice? and it felt -- weird, tingly-weird, but not painful, and I was thinking of the way if I just touched there or there and pressed a little she would die. It scared me. I didn't have a reason to hurt her, and I thought about how to. I just know how to hurt people all the time. I see you move, and I calculate the ways to throw my foot so you'll fall and I can -- I don't have any reason to hurt you. I didn't mind when we were sitting close, this morning. But I still planned..."
"Then it's yourself you're afraid of," Duo replied sadly.
Heero took a few seconds to think about it. "I didn't especially want it to stop, but I still was aware that you were too close and that I should kill you before you tried to hurt me. It's stupid. If you wanted to, you would have done so. I've gone through two headaches now with you close by."
"Not logical, huh?" Duo chuckled, a quirky smile on his lips.
Heero made a weird growly sound, visibly annoyed. "It's the training. I can't get rid of it."
"Look, look, it's all normal. I mean, we're practically strangers, so you have no reason to trust me. Except for the me not killin' ya in your sleep part. And I figure you'll just have to... train yourself to ignore your training. Thinkin' shit is okay, so long as ya don't do it."
"But you tolerate me. you try your best to answer my questions, even though they probably sound stupid. I shouldn't be that wary."
"Ya don't think I haven't been figurin' out ways to whack ya if I had to?"
Now THAT had caught his attention. He apparently hadn't realized Duo did that too. The scavenger grinned.
"See? It's the difference between thinkin' an' doin'."
Heero's face looked very different when he smiled, even though it was such a tiny smile that you probably had to be used to his usual expressions to see it.
"Now that's better," Duo commented, smiling back. "Looks a bit weird, but a smile on your face is better than a scowl."
"... I look weird?"
Ack, return of the scowl! "It's just not usual to see ya smile. If ya smile more, it won't be weird."
Heero grunted, but if was more a 'I heard what you just said' sound than anything indicating an opinion on the subject.
"I figure, yer problem is that nobody ever really cared for ya. Not in the way that matters."
"Which is?" Heero prompted him.
"Well, ya know how I said I wiped the noses of my kids? That sort of way. The way that shows someone cares for ya. That's why I try so hard. I want 'em to know what bein' loved feels like. ... might be the only chance they get."
"....ah."
"Heh... an' now yer confused again," Duo chuckled as he noticed the way Heero's forehead creased in thought.
"A little. But I'm used to it. You're very confusing." He paused, then, "That's okay. I'm learning a lot." As if he was worried that Duo would take it badly. The scavenger grinned.
"That's good. ... I think I have a way to show ya what I mean, though..." And with that, he stopped and turned to face his traveling companion. "Now, this is just an example, okay? I ain't gonna hurt ya or nothin'."
Heero nodded slowly, visibly wondering what he was up to. But he stayed in place when Duo stepped up close and reached out, brushing his fingers across his cheek. The braided man placed his fingers under Heero's chin, tipping his head up, then kissed his forehead gently.
The clone was frozen in place, eyes wide as he gaped at Duo. He so visibly didn't understand -- and his shoulder was so tense under Duo's hand that he was shaking; the man considered it a miracle that he wasn't attacking him yet.
Duo smiled softly, then kissed Heero's cheek and tickled Heero's chin a little before stepping away. He wondered if that had helped or if it confused Heero more. The clone's eyes went even wider, and he touched his cheek slowly and then looked at him as if he couldn't comprehend what had just happened.
"So... ya understand some? That's what it feels like to have someone care for ya."
Heero didn't answer, still frozen.
"Eh? Are ya okay?" Duo asked finally, starting to wonder if that had been such a great idea.
"Uh. Yes," Heero stammered back, and shook himself out of it. "Why did you do that? I'm not a child anymore."
"Nah, but ya act like it sometimes. An' everyone deserves to be cared for. Maybe people wouldn't be such assholes if they had a little affection."
Duo shouldered his shotgun again and started walking. "... we're makin' good time. Maybe we'll even get back by tonight," he commented.
Heero nodded absently, but didn't like he'd really heard. Which was proved a second later when he prodded at the topic once again.
"You... touched my chin. Weirdly. Why did you do that?"
"What do you mean, weirdly?"
"... Tickled?"
"Oh, yeah. Didn't ya like it? It's supposed to feel tickly and weird."
"It did. Why did you do that?"
"Heh... I did it 'cuz it seemed like the right thing to do."
The clone was actually pouting. Oh, barely, that was true, but -- he way his lower lip jutted out sulkily couldn'tbe qualified as anything else.
"... Cute."
Heero blinked owlishly. "Cute?"
"Yup. You are, when ya pout like that. It's cute."
Heero pouted more. "I don't pout," he growled, and started to walk faster.
"Right right," chuckled Duo, "I guess I was mistaken."
Heero ignored him. Duo knew he'd probably confused him enough for one day, so he decided to leave him alone, so that he could sort out his thoughts. Besides, he'd told Heero to ask him any questions. If the clone got too mixed up hopefully, he would ask.

International Feedback day
Voilà, je vais arrêter de parler maintenant ...
PS : ça fait un bon moment maintenant que je me demande si ça ne vaudrait pas le coup de traduire en anglais Lève-toi et marche, et le Petit Chaperon Sanglant ... si toi et Kin êtes intéressées par me laisser faire un trad, faites-le moi savoir, parce que même si j'ai des tonnes de trucs à faire, ça, c'est un projet qui me plairait beaucoup ... je trouve dommage que tous ces fans anglophones ne puisse pas profiter de ces deux là !
Re: International Feedback day
Après c'est promis juré je t'embête plus jamais.
Re: International Feedback day
Pour ce qui est de leve-toi et marche, j'essaye de le traduire, mais 1) c'est trop long et 2) c'est presque tout des jeux de mots et de l'argot. c'est infernal à traduire. j'en ai fait un chapitre et demi et après j'ai laissé tomber. Je m'y remettrai quand le werewolf et walking the tightrope seront finis, parce que pour le moment... x_x Etant donné que pour ces deux fics je veux profiter de la traduction pour réécrire un peu, malheureusement, je pense pas que je peux laisser quelqu'un d'autre les traduire. x_x (quand à kin, elle est nulle en anglais. XDDDD) Merci quand même pour la proposition, c'est très gentil ^___^