(no subject)

[askerian]

I posted some of that before. It's a 5+1, kind of.

Song is Ashes to Ashes by Blind Guardian.

Taste the poison
Feel that this is life

The man tasted the cup of coffee that had been cooling on his desk for more than an hour now and made a face. The stuff tasted awful, but he needed it if he was to finish his mission report.

He dragged his chair closer to the desk and leaned over his papers again, not caring about the whispers of his coworkers.


Chang Wufei had always had a rather developed intuition. Well, what he liked to call an intuition, when he happened to think about it, which wasn't that often. It was what gave him the reputation to be able to handle any explosive mission given to him, and what made his Preventer colleagues call him a weirdo and a freak behind his back, though never without a healthy dose of respect and/or puzzlement thrown in… and never without his knowledge, although he never let out that he knew and/or cared. Because as strange as his apparently baseless actions were, they always went right at the end. He just happened to have hunches, good hunches.

When he thought about it, he just told himself that he happened to be an individual with a fairly well-developed intuition, and what was intuition if not the ability to collect and assemble nearly invisible clues, only perceptible by the subconscious of an individual, and putting them together to make leaps of logic based on them? You just needed to have a methodical intellect, a good sense of observation, and a good visual memory. Some intelligence helped too, although it wasn't that necessary… even if he knew that he WAS intelligent.

He just happened to have this ability more developed than what was the usual for most people. That was why he didn't enjoy the rare times he had been dragged into playing poker with colleagues, he always half-subconsciously read their body languages to know what he had to do to win. It wasn't amusing. The only time he played cards against someone and had fun had been with Duo Maxwell, another of the five Gundam pilots who had fought in the war. The man was totally unpredictable, probably because even himself didn't know what he was going to do before doing it. There were moments where he was entirely spontaneous.

Wufei prided himself in being able to read the flow of events around him, political moods, popular desires, this kind of things. He had known before it would happen of the mounting of the war, long before the adults had begun to bitch about their problems with Earth louder than usual. It probably was because he had always been an outsider and could read things more easily when he was being objective. Others could have seen it too, if they had thought about looking.

During the first attack against their colony, he had known, before asking Master O where the other mobile Suit was gone, that something awful was happening to someone close to him… and finding Meiran dying had only been a confirmation. Even if his family was one of the more important ones and was probably all gathered some place where it would be sheltered, and common sense said that they were amongst the ones that feared the less in all the colony… He had probably felt that Meiran was reckless enough to try something by herself. Seeing her getting killed was just... proof that he had been right.

Some other times, he just happened to have random thoughts enter his head, and most of the time it annoyed him to no end, because he had no way of knowing if they were important, or if they truly were just that, random thoughts without any importance, like any person could have. The problem was that it annoyed Wufei to no end to realize that he was as prone as any non-trained person to lose his concentration. He had learned to stay focused since childhood, but even with that, there were still moments where a totally incongruous thought would run around in his skull. And it irked him something good.

That was probably why, when typing a mission rapport for the last operation he had done with the Preventers, and getting to think about another of his colleagues during the war, he dismissed the thought with a snort. All the damn typing had made him think of Heero.

He wondered what the boy had become since the end of the Mariemeya incident, then told himself to forget it. He was probably at Relena's. Or with Duo… Duo who had left them with a smile and hadn't been seen since, although they still received an email from time to time telling them he was still alive and kicking.

Apart from Quatre, no one amongst them really kept in touch with Wufei. Maybe it was because he had always forced himself to stay away, not to fraternize, maybe it was resentment from the Mariemeya army thing. The fact was that he wasn't very close to the other Gundam Pilots, not as close as he would have appreciated… after all they were the only ones really able to understand him, even a little, him who felt always so far from his colleagues and from the boys his age. It was much more his fault than any of the other pilots', after all he had never really shown openly that he would accept their friendly offers.

Amongst all of them, Heero was the least likely to keep in touch with him. He was a respectable warrior, a noble soul, and had better things to do than attaching himself to Wufei's side.

Just a silly, baseless random thought.

He shrugged, and sipped at his awful-tasting coffee before beginning to type again.


Hallowed be the game
Of life and innocence

The second time that random thought of Heero entered his mind, he didn't dismiss it as easily.

Because it had happened just when he was chasing down a criminal, and the brutal flash nearly got him a bullet through the head. His partner screamed at him, and the Preventer shook himself out of that strange trance and ran after the man that his distraction had helped to escape.

They caught him, sure, but not as fast as they could have. Because Wufei was spending half of his thought process to trying to stifle the random thought, the nonsensical flash.

His partner tore him a new one when they were finished, and for once, Wufei didn't answer. It was well-deserved, damnit!
This night, he meditated for three hours, trying to find his way back to calm and logic.

When he went to bed, he was sure he had succeeded. He would not think about Heero anymore.


God's waiting for him

He dreamed of him instead.

Join us at the road to fate
There are two paths

He was in front of a building. Lots and lots of flats, kind of dirty, some broken windows, the street littered with detritus. Wrinkling his nose, he began to walk down the road, wanting nothing more than to get the hell away from this place.

There was a door, to enter the building, an unassuming door. Brownish, painted countless times over by various gangs and 'street artists', and visibly opened by ways of kicking more often than by its handle.

He had never seen a door that was as compelling as this one.
He looked down the street. Leaving?

The door.

Or visiting....?


He stepped inside.

Feel the pain
Which steps into his life

All the doors were the same, endless corridors and doors after doors after doors, and stairs, and doors again. But when he arrived in front of the good one, he knew. It didn't look different, but...

Somehow, he knew.

Because that door felt like pain.


Agony
He'll be crucified

The dream fast-forwarded suddenly, then came to a normal speed again, and he felt dizzy.

He was seeing a strange, distorted view of a room, as if he was floating behind one of the corners of the ceiling, looking through a deformed glass.

The room was white, but not a pure, luminous white, but a muted white, strangely dirty, harsh on what was contained within. The light blinked on and off, on and off, following an incomprehensible pattern. He needed time to understand that here was a white, ceramic sink, there was a mirror, glistening but not reflecting anything, just dull gray metal…

Red, a flash of red on the mirror, and red on the floor, he followed the trail, floating close to the ceiling as if he was not in his body, passed through the shower curtain
a body, frail, so frail, slumped against a cold, off-white wall, and blood everywhere, and still imbedded into the flesh of his wrists, broken slivers of mirror that didn't reflect a thing

Death awaits

The body moaned low, so low he didn't believe he had heard it. There was a shadow floating over him, like a black cloud, ominous, threatening. The bloodied man shuddered.

The cloud shivered, as if detaching itself from the man. Then floated through the ceiling. Wufei shuddered and looked down.

Under it, the man had breathed his last breath and his sightless eyes were turned up, as if he could see the spectator, but he couldn't, because the color had bled from his usually so blue eyes

bled away

with his

life, bled away with his life, and he was dead, dead, dead, eyes empty, void of soul, and in the dream, Wufei screamed a silent scream that tore at the edges of realities.

It had been Heero.

Knocking at his door
Agony

Backward, in front of the door that felt like pain once again, as if nothing had happened – but nothing had happened, had it? He had forgotten.

He lifted his hand, knocked, because he had been raised to be a polite man and that was the polite thing to do. He waited and waited and waited, but no one came to open the door.

Then he noticed that it wasn't closed properly, and just to see what it would do, he pushed it, slowly. He didn't really expect it to open, but it did anyway.

He entered. No one in the house.

He wandered for a moment, calling for the inhabitant with a name that he couldn't hear, that he couldn't even comprehend.

Pain, pain, pain again. Just a glimpse in the bathroom, nothing to see here, his mind told him, nothing, so leave. Leave. Leave NOW! Because it's too awful to bear, and it doesn't even concern you, so don't stay.

So, he didn't.

The room and his mind faded to black.

Leave him

Once again, flashing backwards, and he was back in front of the unassuming door. He shook his head. He was not going to enter this time. With effort, he resisted the pull. Then walked away.

The clock will strike the end

Far away, a clock chimed, deep, slow.


He was in a graveyard and the sky was dark, thunder rolling, but not any flashes of light. There were two faceless people covering a casket, their heavy shovel-full of earth thumping dully on the wood. They didn't seem to see him.

Then Wufei was alone and as before, not able to touch anything. He wondered why he was there, and walked closer to the new grave. There was a gravestone already on it, which was illogical since it had just been filled, but after all it was a dream.

Just before he leaned forward to read the inscription, he was already aware of what he would read.

Gundam Pilot 01
Code Name Heero Yuy
Real Name Forever Unknown
AC 180-AC 198

Hell or heaven
Reflect and fade away

He woke up in a leap.

Damn, what a freaky dream! He grabbed for the glass of water on his nightstand and gulped it down. What had it been about already?

The freshness of the water cooled him down, and he rolled the glass against the side of his neck.

Flashes of a strange white light, a bathroom, something red, and then... the smell of freshly moved earth and rain, and... startled sadness, and pain. He didn't quite remember exactly, though... and he didn't want to. It had not been a pleasant dream.

He got up to refill the glass, not feeling up to go back to sleep quite yet anyway. Walked to the bathroom in silence, not turning the lights on; he knew the apartment well enough that he didn't need it to find his way.

The darkness was soothing. He didn't want the harsh white lights of the halogen lamp.

He filled his glass, gulped it down, filled it again, got back to his room.

Too sleepy to care for long about the broken shards of silver coated in red that had flashed where his reflection should have been.