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Monthly Word Count -- April
... @_@
27 262 words.
Holy mother of God.
It's, I think, pretty much all Battlefield Terra. *stares at that fic* >_>
But anyway.
POSTED:
-Homestuck: Adventures in Collaborative Storytelling John/Jade(/Karkat) awkward cybering (2 562 words)
-Homestuck: Battlefield Terra chapters end-of-3 and 4 (16 617 words and also linked to on AO3 because too many pos on lj i am a lazy asuka.)
-Naruto: Spin Me Right Round Baby SasuNaruSaku drunken fun (2 885 words)
-Naruto: Sai/Sasuke, crowd pleaser, kissing (715 words)
-Naruto: Kisame/Itachi, adoring, kissing (184 words)
-FF7: Daemon AU: City of the Ancients (150 words -- THERE WERE SO FEW WORDS MISSING FOR SO MANY MONTHS WHY oh well I have beaten that bitch.)
(I also posted Lone Wolf and Pilot chapter 1 part 1 but it had been complete for a little while already, I just got tired of sitting on it and cut the chapter in two.)
WORKS IN PROGRESS
-Gundam Wing: Lone Wolf and Pilot (1 138 words)
-FF7: Daemon AU: zack prequel (559 words)
-Homestuck: Terezi/Dave/Karkat rping harem pr0nz. (yes seriously.) (2 452 words)
--
Lone Wolf and Pilot
--
Wufei gave him a slow blink, and then a dry chuckle. "I'd forgotten you could be quite that pessimistic."
Didn't deny it, though. Duo quirked an eyebrow. "Fair warning, buddy. Tell me you're just staying to socialize during work hours and I'll laugh my ass off at you. Might give myself a hernia."
"It's nothing horrible, I just figured you'd prefer hearing it from me than from the drill instructor in two days. First there's the uniform regulations--"
"I'm not cutting my goddamn hair."
An unimpressed, ironic look. "Has my own ponytail suddenly become invisible? No, shut up about how tight it is and that you thought my skull was just painted that color, I've heard it all before."
Duo obediently closed his mouth. He pinched his lips, too, else he'd probably start laughing. Now which suicidal idiot had said it in Wufei's earshot? Even Duo had never dared to go that far.
"Preventers was funded by three women, two of which have long hair. It was never even in the regs. I don't see you going on assignment with your hair loose anyway, so it won't be a problem. No, it's about Killer."
At the other end of the room, nose in a bunk that most certainly did not belong to him, Killer rotated his ear in their direction. Keep out of there or they'll probably bite you, Duo sent, knowing better than to bother trying to get a wolf to understand 'don't do it to them if you wouldn't like them doing it to you'.
"What about the Furmeister?"
"He looks like he was dragged backward through a hedge," Wufei threw bluntly. "And he's dusty. I don't know your old grooming habits, Maxwell, but he needs a wash, and he most certainly needs a brushing."
Duo's cheeks started burning.
The next second Killer was trotting back to him, head low and looking like he was about to revoke Wufei's tentative 'non-edible' status. For a second Duo hadn't been able to help remembering being eight year old in borrowed clothes and being told he smelled. Killer hadn't liked it much better back then; Father had to lock him in the cellar for the next week as Duo went back to school, or half-grown, awkward cub or not there would have been an incident in the school yard.
--
Daemon AU: zack prequel
--
The worst thing is Zack is starting to get used to seeing daemons explode into golden motes before their person's body has even hit the ground.
He's never been in the backwash of one before.
Second Class Ulweiss sprawls at his feet like a lump of clay, a dull thud and then total, heavy immobility. Zack falls to his knees and shudders and fights not to scream, bathed in death-sparks, in dissipating bits of soul-stuff, as what used to be a coyote washes through him, already turned shapeless, already forgetting itself.
Callie roars beside him, heavy drake tail thrashing around them in wide circles; it might help clear enemy ninja, but it's nothing but reflex. She doesn't have the presence of mind to fight. He doesn't have the presence of mind to do anything but kneel and shudder and try to grasp at Ulweiss and Kisa, at what they are, were, at least keep an imprint of them. He didn't even know them well but now he knows them as he has never known anyone, soul-deep.
He can't hold anything back, of course. It feels wrong and bad and wrong but he can't abandon a comrade, he can't.
Callie's blind-thrashing tail slaps into his flank and he topples to the side with a cry of very physical pain and she yowls in turn as his pain echoes; she broke one of his ribs.
More ninjas than the rocks ought to be able to hide pour out into sight. They're surrounded. They're fucked. Zack stumbles to his daemon; Callie makes a circle, a wall of herself, she tosses her massive ox-horns. The ninjas dodge and charge back in.
Zack's hand is on his sword but all he can think is that it feels wrong, that it isn't a spear.
Ulweiss is dead he likes tea and he had a completely tortuous sense of humor and was a bit of a sadist but only in purely consensual situations and he volunteered at an animal shelter when on leave and Zack now knows all the people he's ever loved in heart-aching detail, and how at the last second Ulweiss' last thought was a faintly surprised, disgruntled 'shit, I'll never know how that book ends now'.
Zack's own thoughts are a scattered mess and at the center is dismay that he can't think of anything better but some other man's death thoughts, that it feels more real than his own.
--
Terezi/Dave/Karkat rping harem pr0nz.
--
-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] began trolling turntechGodhead [TG] --
GC: TH1S M1GHTY L3G1SL4C3R4TOR MOST HUMBLY R3QU1R3 YOUR COOL3ST 4SS1ST4NC3, S1R COOLKN1GHT
TG: sounds serious
TG: assistance with?
GC: TH1S MOST 1MPORT4NT QU3ST.
GC: 1T W1LL B3 GLOR1OUS, D4V3, YOU SH4LL B3 L3FT 1N 4W3
TG: boy i am sure convinced sight unseen and all i just trust you that much tz it has never led me wrong
TG: so what is it
TG: spit it out already are you trying your seer wiles on me so i convince myself from pure curiosity
TG: dirty thats roses trick imma tell on you
GC: YOU M1GHT C4LL 1T 4...
GC: S3XP3R1M3NT.
It comes to no surprise to you that you are in fact fucking whipped. You are the mayor of Whippedtown, it is you. You have renamed yourself Dave W. Cream; Strider was no longer an appropriate descriptor. You are so whipped that whipped doesn't apply anymore, because it implies she needs a weapon to train you into following her every whim, when in fact all she needs is to snap her fingers, and there you are, going "okay why the fuck not." It'll be written on your tombstone some day.
You don't get how anyone can pity this fierce bitch. She is boneringly terrifying.
At least one thing you never are is bored. She likes to drag you miles over the borders of your comfort zone, dump you naked and confused in the middle of rainforests the White Man has never touched.
Hey there, mysterious tribe guy from a possibly cannibal society. "Sup," you say. "I come in peace."
He gives you the stinkeye over his shoulder, just about telegraphing that he can't be bothered to turn away from his crabtop for you. You amble closer, hands in your pockets. If he wants to make it easier on you, hey, whatev'.
"What do you want, Strider? I'm busy."
You think idly that Karkat never used to be too busy to hurl insults at you, or possibly play dick ouija, it's weird to get a whole answer without a single bulgemongling shit-stick in it.
"Busy playing troll solitaire. I see how it is. I feel so jilted right now you have no idea. Here I was, extending the hand of peace and cahootship."
You didn't really notice yourself, but Terezi was right that the little fuckhead's been drawing away. He twitches a little when you speak but he refuses to even look at you.
If this can't draw him back then nothing can. Not that you care much, but.
Terezi does. Welp. That's it, then.
"What the ever-loving hell do you mean by cahootship."
He's so busy trying to sound bored, and still not turning around. Oh well.
You lean in over his shoulder. "Terezi and I are FLARPing. We need a third, you're it." And then you slip your arms under his and lock them behind his head, and he's still squawking in shock when you pull him straight off his chair.
Walking backwards is awkward but you don't have to drag him far, just a couple doors down from the hub where the transportalizer dumps you. Terezi waits there, sitting on her plush pile like it's a throne. It might as well be.
"Strider you let me go right this instant or I swear to the horrorterrors I will end you!"
He's been yelling insults from the computer lab to here. You've been tuning them out. You turn around so he's facing Terezi and you let him go.
"The captive, Sahib." You slap the door control panel, making it woosh closed.
She grins and crooks her finger in clear invitation. When Karkat notices what she's wearing he freezes in mid-word. You have to admit it's pretty epic, deserves a spittake or two.
The turban is particularly huge and utterly ridiculous. Especially with the fake stone on it, bigger than your fist, and the feather that could be used as an umbrella. You kind of love it.
The strapless band around her tits mostly serves to highlight the bare, smooth skin of her stomach, toned and lithe and ending in the most appealing belly ever. Her hips jut out; the pants hang almost indecently low. If Karkat's anything like you he's got to be hoping she'll get up at some point, because surely there's no way those can stay up under their own power, not unless she glued them on.
She's also lounging in a purple fur coat styled in the purest pimpdaddy tradition. You could have told her that harem master and ho wrangler weren't really from the same time period or corner of the globe but the sheer magnificence of it is enough to make you not give the tiniest shit.
"... Uh."
"Yeah," you say with a slow, reverent nod.
Karkat can't tear his eyes away. He seems halfway to a heart attack, only in a very unusual departure from all the times the lot of you give him heart attacks it seems he's having trouble speaking as well. "You -- FLARPing. You said. What?"
Terezi waves her hand expansively; candy stone rings glitter on her fingers. She probably licked them until they were shiny. "I have generously decided to go with human storytelling frames, since Dave is going to be otherwise outnumbered. There are some fascinating things in Earth's history!"
You've mentioned that you're not even the right ethnicity to her, but you're human, the stories depicted humans, apparently that's close enough for government work. "Woohoo exotification."
Terezi's grin widens dangerously. "Enough backtalk! Bring the captive to me, Captain."
"Oh, I'm a captain now?" you say, while grabbing Karkat's upper arms from behind. Once again he only thinks of struggling once it's too late. His brain seems to be lagging from the massive blow to his synapses that represents a half-naked, decadently lounging Pyrope.
"Captain of my guard, my most trusted lieutenant..."
"Hm. Sure, I can dig that."
"Hey -- what the fuck -- what are you two -- hey!"
27 262 words.
Holy mother of God.
It's, I think, pretty much all Battlefield Terra. *stares at that fic* >_>
But anyway.
POSTED:
-Homestuck: Adventures in Collaborative Storytelling John/Jade(/Karkat) awkward cybering (2 562 words)
-Homestuck: Battlefield Terra chapters end-of-3 and 4 (16 617 words and also linked to on AO3 because too many pos on lj i am a lazy asuka.)
-Naruto: Spin Me Right Round Baby SasuNaruSaku drunken fun (2 885 words)
-Naruto: Sai/Sasuke, crowd pleaser, kissing (715 words)
-Naruto: Kisame/Itachi, adoring, kissing (184 words)
-FF7: Daemon AU: City of the Ancients (150 words -- THERE WERE SO FEW WORDS MISSING FOR SO MANY MONTHS WHY oh well I have beaten that bitch.)
(I also posted Lone Wolf and Pilot chapter 1 part 1 but it had been complete for a little while already, I just got tired of sitting on it and cut the chapter in two.)
WORKS IN PROGRESS
-Gundam Wing: Lone Wolf and Pilot (1 138 words)
-FF7: Daemon AU: zack prequel (559 words)
-Homestuck: Terezi/Dave/Karkat rping harem pr0nz. (yes seriously.) (2 452 words)
--
Lone Wolf and Pilot
--
Wufei gave him a slow blink, and then a dry chuckle. "I'd forgotten you could be quite that pessimistic."
Didn't deny it, though. Duo quirked an eyebrow. "Fair warning, buddy. Tell me you're just staying to socialize during work hours and I'll laugh my ass off at you. Might give myself a hernia."
"It's nothing horrible, I just figured you'd prefer hearing it from me than from the drill instructor in two days. First there's the uniform regulations--"
"I'm not cutting my goddamn hair."
An unimpressed, ironic look. "Has my own ponytail suddenly become invisible? No, shut up about how tight it is and that you thought my skull was just painted that color, I've heard it all before."
Duo obediently closed his mouth. He pinched his lips, too, else he'd probably start laughing. Now which suicidal idiot had said it in Wufei's earshot? Even Duo had never dared to go that far.
"Preventers was funded by three women, two of which have long hair. It was never even in the regs. I don't see you going on assignment with your hair loose anyway, so it won't be a problem. No, it's about Killer."
At the other end of the room, nose in a bunk that most certainly did not belong to him, Killer rotated his ear in their direction. Keep out of there or they'll probably bite you, Duo sent, knowing better than to bother trying to get a wolf to understand 'don't do it to them if you wouldn't like them doing it to you'.
"What about the Furmeister?"
"He looks like he was dragged backward through a hedge," Wufei threw bluntly. "And he's dusty. I don't know your old grooming habits, Maxwell, but he needs a wash, and he most certainly needs a brushing."
Duo's cheeks started burning.
The next second Killer was trotting back to him, head low and looking like he was about to revoke Wufei's tentative 'non-edible' status. For a second Duo hadn't been able to help remembering being eight year old in borrowed clothes and being told he smelled. Killer hadn't liked it much better back then; Father had to lock him in the cellar for the next week as Duo went back to school, or half-grown, awkward cub or not there would have been an incident in the school yard.
--
Daemon AU: zack prequel
--
The worst thing is Zack is starting to get used to seeing daemons explode into golden motes before their person's body has even hit the ground.
He's never been in the backwash of one before.
Second Class Ulweiss sprawls at his feet like a lump of clay, a dull thud and then total, heavy immobility. Zack falls to his knees and shudders and fights not to scream, bathed in death-sparks, in dissipating bits of soul-stuff, as what used to be a coyote washes through him, already turned shapeless, already forgetting itself.
Callie roars beside him, heavy drake tail thrashing around them in wide circles; it might help clear enemy ninja, but it's nothing but reflex. She doesn't have the presence of mind to fight. He doesn't have the presence of mind to do anything but kneel and shudder and try to grasp at Ulweiss and Kisa, at what they are, were, at least keep an imprint of them. He didn't even know them well but now he knows them as he has never known anyone, soul-deep.
He can't hold anything back, of course. It feels wrong and bad and wrong but he can't abandon a comrade, he can't.
Callie's blind-thrashing tail slaps into his flank and he topples to the side with a cry of very physical pain and she yowls in turn as his pain echoes; she broke one of his ribs.
More ninjas than the rocks ought to be able to hide pour out into sight. They're surrounded. They're fucked. Zack stumbles to his daemon; Callie makes a circle, a wall of herself, she tosses her massive ox-horns. The ninjas dodge and charge back in.
Zack's hand is on his sword but all he can think is that it feels wrong, that it isn't a spear.
Ulweiss is dead he likes tea and he had a completely tortuous sense of humor and was a bit of a sadist but only in purely consensual situations and he volunteered at an animal shelter when on leave and Zack now knows all the people he's ever loved in heart-aching detail, and how at the last second Ulweiss' last thought was a faintly surprised, disgruntled 'shit, I'll never know how that book ends now'.
Zack's own thoughts are a scattered mess and at the center is dismay that he can't think of anything better but some other man's death thoughts, that it feels more real than his own.
--
Terezi/Dave/Karkat rping harem pr0nz.
--
-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] began trolling turntechGodhead [TG] --
GC: TH1S M1GHTY L3G1SL4C3R4TOR MOST HUMBLY R3QU1R3 YOUR COOL3ST 4SS1ST4NC3, S1R COOLKN1GHT
TG: sounds serious
TG: assistance with?
GC: TH1S MOST 1MPORT4NT QU3ST.
GC: 1T W1LL B3 GLOR1OUS, D4V3, YOU SH4LL B3 L3FT 1N 4W3
TG: boy i am sure convinced sight unseen and all i just trust you that much tz it has never led me wrong
TG: so what is it
TG: spit it out already are you trying your seer wiles on me so i convince myself from pure curiosity
TG: dirty thats roses trick imma tell on you
GC: YOU M1GHT C4LL 1T 4...
GC: S3XP3R1M3NT.
It comes to no surprise to you that you are in fact fucking whipped. You are the mayor of Whippedtown, it is you. You have renamed yourself Dave W. Cream; Strider was no longer an appropriate descriptor. You are so whipped that whipped doesn't apply anymore, because it implies she needs a weapon to train you into following her every whim, when in fact all she needs is to snap her fingers, and there you are, going "okay why the fuck not." It'll be written on your tombstone some day.
You don't get how anyone can pity this fierce bitch. She is boneringly terrifying.
At least one thing you never are is bored. She likes to drag you miles over the borders of your comfort zone, dump you naked and confused in the middle of rainforests the White Man has never touched.
Hey there, mysterious tribe guy from a possibly cannibal society. "Sup," you say. "I come in peace."
He gives you the stinkeye over his shoulder, just about telegraphing that he can't be bothered to turn away from his crabtop for you. You amble closer, hands in your pockets. If he wants to make it easier on you, hey, whatev'.
"What do you want, Strider? I'm busy."
You think idly that Karkat never used to be too busy to hurl insults at you, or possibly play dick ouija, it's weird to get a whole answer without a single bulgemongling shit-stick in it.
"Busy playing troll solitaire. I see how it is. I feel so jilted right now you have no idea. Here I was, extending the hand of peace and cahootship."
You didn't really notice yourself, but Terezi was right that the little fuckhead's been drawing away. He twitches a little when you speak but he refuses to even look at you.
If this can't draw him back then nothing can. Not that you care much, but.
Terezi does. Welp. That's it, then.
"What the ever-loving hell do you mean by cahootship."
He's so busy trying to sound bored, and still not turning around. Oh well.
You lean in over his shoulder. "Terezi and I are FLARPing. We need a third, you're it." And then you slip your arms under his and lock them behind his head, and he's still squawking in shock when you pull him straight off his chair.
Walking backwards is awkward but you don't have to drag him far, just a couple doors down from the hub where the transportalizer dumps you. Terezi waits there, sitting on her plush pile like it's a throne. It might as well be.
"Strider you let me go right this instant or I swear to the horrorterrors I will end you!"
He's been yelling insults from the computer lab to here. You've been tuning them out. You turn around so he's facing Terezi and you let him go.
"The captive, Sahib." You slap the door control panel, making it woosh closed.
She grins and crooks her finger in clear invitation. When Karkat notices what she's wearing he freezes in mid-word. You have to admit it's pretty epic, deserves a spittake or two.
The turban is particularly huge and utterly ridiculous. Especially with the fake stone on it, bigger than your fist, and the feather that could be used as an umbrella. You kind of love it.
The strapless band around her tits mostly serves to highlight the bare, smooth skin of her stomach, toned and lithe and ending in the most appealing belly ever. Her hips jut out; the pants hang almost indecently low. If Karkat's anything like you he's got to be hoping she'll get up at some point, because surely there's no way those can stay up under their own power, not unless she glued them on.
She's also lounging in a purple fur coat styled in the purest pimpdaddy tradition. You could have told her that harem master and ho wrangler weren't really from the same time period or corner of the globe but the sheer magnificence of it is enough to make you not give the tiniest shit.
"... Uh."
"Yeah," you say with a slow, reverent nod.
Karkat can't tear his eyes away. He seems halfway to a heart attack, only in a very unusual departure from all the times the lot of you give him heart attacks it seems he's having trouble speaking as well. "You -- FLARPing. You said. What?"
Terezi waves her hand expansively; candy stone rings glitter on her fingers. She probably licked them until they were shiny. "I have generously decided to go with human storytelling frames, since Dave is going to be otherwise outnumbered. There are some fascinating things in Earth's history!"
You've mentioned that you're not even the right ethnicity to her, but you're human, the stories depicted humans, apparently that's close enough for government work. "Woohoo exotification."
Terezi's grin widens dangerously. "Enough backtalk! Bring the captive to me, Captain."
"Oh, I'm a captain now?" you say, while grabbing Karkat's upper arms from behind. Once again he only thinks of struggling once it's too late. His brain seems to be lagging from the massive blow to his synapses that represents a half-naked, decadently lounging Pyrope.
"Captain of my guard, my most trusted lieutenant..."
"Hm. Sure, I can dig that."
"Hey -- what the fuck -- what are you two -- hey!"