Oh, I like this! Poor Cloud, not only having to deal wiht all the ways he knows he's biased and emotionally unbalanced by this situation, but also having to face the chance that Sephiroth is trying to pull the puppet thing again. And just the sheer depth of how much he needs Zack and Aeries... *pets him* It makes such a lot of sense for him to turn leadership over to Cid. I also like that Tifa is trying to let the others reach their own conclusions, and that Barret insists on taking Denzel somewhere safe. Yay for parents thinking about children!
A few editing notes:
He'd really fucked up if Barret had gone from loud complaining to this kind of steely-eyed restrain. You're missing a T at the end of restraint.
"Yeah, do it on the landline," Denzel replied, grouching but not managing to hide his worry. "Phone reception gets shitty back home."
"It's always been."
It feels as though you're missing a word in Cloud's response -- I'd advise switching to "It's always been like that," or just "It always has been." It isn't technically wrong as written, but it sounds awkward and most people wouldn't construct a sentence that way.
no subject
A few editing notes:
He'd really fucked up if Barret had gone from loud complaining to this kind of steely-eyed restrain. You're missing a T at the end of restraint.
"Yeah, do it on the landline," Denzel replied, grouching but not managing to hide his worry. "Phone reception gets shitty back home."
"It's always been."
It feels as though you're missing a word in Cloud's response -- I'd advise switching to "It's always been like that," or just "It always has been." It isn't technically wrong as written, but it sounds awkward and most people wouldn't construct a sentence that way.