Life and Times of Teh Asuka

Warning for sexual harassment.

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Troll wifi sucks, is what Dave decides after twenty very calm, very rational minutes spent sitting on his ass in slimy heart-patterned boxers fiddling with his iShades, then his iPhone, and his suddenly not floating anymore turntop.

(It still works, it just won't stay up, and it's heavy on his knees.)

He'd use the desktop but his house has no power either. The lights won't turn on. His blinds aren't the best, though; outside there's billboards and shit, so he can see fine.

Maybe a little too fine.

He ain't complaining.

"Okay," he says to the walls -- good walls, best listeners, they didn't even mind when he was flipping his sh -- no, he was calm from the start, yes, he was. Anyway the walls are cool, they don't judge. "I need to go and fix this shit, if it can be fixed, and if I can't I need to find someone who can. Yep. That's the plan."

Interacting with strangers isn't something he looks forward to, but who knows what happened to Jade or John, the naive bastards, they know even less about trolls than he does and they're sure to land themselves in deep shit. Someone needs to come to the rescue.

( Read more... )

WHO WANTS NINETEEN PAGES OF SOLLUXNESS.

Last time I ever write that asshole. By the way. This thing was supposed to be a quick prologue to some other shit entirely and then he just kept babbling, and I don’t even think my grasp on him is all that good. Bluh.

This fic slots right during/after the first two Karkat and Signless-centric fics in the series, where they’ve just emerged into the new world, almost everyone is still in the cave, and over half of them are asleep.

Contains: Sollux <3< Roxy, Sollux <3 Feferi, Signless/Psii, the Life girls duking it out, and a chatlog.
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With half of everybody still asleep or so groggy they might as well be, Feferi busy sitting vigil by her horrorterror of an Ancestress, thankfully still conked out, Terezi chatting up a storm with her own, Karkat having fucked off for parts unknown, and no internet connection...

You'd be bored enough to cry like a little bitch without Roxy. Maybe enough to blast a second tunnel to the surface with your brain. Either/or. (Then again, after that you'd be outside but apparently outside there's plants and nature and shit. Nope.jpg.) When Roxy's awake, though, it's hard to remember that the walls are boring and rocky and the floor is hard and rocky and you are surrounded by boring hard rock and slumbering assholes and just about nothing else.

When she's awake you're too busy wanting to slap her across the snout. Only that'd be way too cheap.

"Choke on my hot long self-replicating worm, you script kiddie!"

"Iyaan, Solly-baby, what is this, it's too big, it'll never fit -- whoops I chomped it in half with my rad as hell firebirdwall. Hi there, nice files you have in that li'l folder!"

"Yeah, have fun with my dummy session while I slide all nice and tight in your backdoor--"

"You guys are the filthiest," says that other human girl, the short-and-round cerulean. ( She adds a sadly disappointed shake of her head... )

It's not like I have enough fics to write already, after all. :D

As always!
-You take a fic or ficlet or multipart I've written, and choose whether you want a prequel or a sequel, and/or which character you want to concentrate on (not necessary but always appreciated) and/or a timeframe (i might tell you nothing interesting happens at that point, alas) and/or some aspect of the plot you were curious about idk etc.
-They shall be snippets or ficlets or otherwise roughly comment-sized, which means there's an even chance I'll come out of this post with yet another sprawling, all-devouring 'verse on my hands.
-I make no promise to actually write your prompt. I'll give it a fair try, is all I can offer.
-You can post up to five prompts. I might write one, I might write all five, I might write none.

Not as always!
This time on top of prequels and sequels you're also free to choose a scene and ask for a different POV on it in the same timeframe, or ask what Other Character was doing at the time. (I reserve the right to reject the prompt if the answer is "nothing that interesting.")

Eligible fics:
Just about any of them, teamworkverse, restoreverse, my ofics, even Garou. Random drabbles, fics that already have a sequel, weird crossovers, blahblahblah.

Yes, that means Crossed Wires too.

My ffnet page
My homepage
The archive for all those ficlet that already have a sequel or three. (note, if the ficlet isn't in there that doesn't mean it's not eligible. I'll add it later, no prob.)

Non-eligible:
-Locker Room Therapy (got a few in progress already!)
-Tripletsverse (Naruto/Naruko/Kyuubi) in general (you can ask about a specific fic in the series but you can't just say "tripletsverse! Dude, it spans months and I haven't yet decided some things, I don't think it'll ever officially have an end.)
-Detective Conan/Magic Kaito fics, sorry Jo. .__.
-Duo in Firefly. I have no clue on earth what to do with that one, sorry.
You can try for Heero in SGA but the prompt will have to be awesome, because the inspiration for this one doesn't fly high. Sorry.



Fics so far! :D
NaruSasu... IN SPACE!!, Sasuke meets some more clone-y in-laws (three comments! This is off to a good start. >__>)
Psychic wolves: Heero & Mary prequel
Jet/Zuko sequel from that Jet/Zuko/Katara thing
Byakuya POV from Ichigo Has Two Girlfriends : Brother In Law Edition
Amateur Palemates Smuttin It Up!! now featuring kinky!auspistice!Karkat. Gamzee POV.

Waterbender!Heero, training. (GW/AtLA fusionthing)
Sasuke/Juugo sequel to the Team Hebi Does Sasuke fic


Teamwork: Itachi stabbing Sasuke from Sakura POV

On AO3
On the Kink Meme
Original prompt.

This was for a prompt that, translated from Homestuckese into plain english, is basically "asexual BFFs 'porn' plz!" only the actual prompt was more like "okay the trolls are stuck on a meteor for a year or three so they don't have internet so they don't have PORN so they start kinda watching each other." Since this is about the BFF relationship (moirallegiance AKA pale quadrant AKA the one where your buddy keeps you from losing your shit) and not either lovesex or hatesex, it's not actually porny or naughty or all that kinky. For human values of such. Okay where was I going with that.

-I hate writing Sol's lisp, let's pretend he still lacks a few teeth and only uses it when stressed out and not paying attention. Yes. Let's.
-Some kind of Veil limbo where all trolls are alive (again?) yet Gamzee and Karkat are already together somehow. Don't think about it too hard.
-for supposedly genfic, this has a bit of a voyeur/exhib vibe going on. Just saying.

~3 000 words.

( Of course he'd caught the little glances. Sneaky or not, they'd been going on for perigees now; he would have had to be blind, and also to be hit on the head with something heavy and not skull-friendly. )